Oooo I received an anonymous letter this morning...from THE VILLAGERS 😬

[FlybirdFly]

Will post a pic later but need to redact info first.

An A4 page complaining about rubbish outside my house, that they’ve been picking it up for months, I have a responsibility to secure my rubbish and I have two weeks to get 2/3 wheelie bins or “measures will be taken”

It’s actually quite polite tbf if you ignore the subtle threat

Only problem is....it isn’t my fucking rubbish! We locked the gate to the field a few months ago and everyone now flytips outside the farm instead (by everyone I mean a few wankers) usually black bags that have missed the bin men/women. They use to chuck them on our farm bonfire but as the gate is locked they throw them on the bondary of my property. My rubbish is kept on my property until bin day.

Unfortunately they’ve missed all the signs saying we have CCTV so I’ll be having a look to see if I can see any pitchforks and angry villagers when I get back from the school run

WOw re CCTV info. I have no idea as one of the men on the farm set it up.

It is definitely triggered by spiders though as one set it off repeatedly last night walking over the lens. So they could’ve “walked” around the beam and been missed? But a car etc would set it off? It records permanently between 8am and 6pm but only records movement after that. I know the trees and stuff trigger it as he’s blacked out some of those to stop the cameras going off.

In other news I just met ‘Nigel’ as mentioned upthread in the Local KFC (which had just opened and is a bit of a hit when you live out in the sticks) He was wearing the requisite polo shirt/slacks and parked so that my passenger couldn’t get out to get food. And then checked his car for damage when he returned . When I pointed out it was an arsey thing to do to park right up against someone’s door he suggested i ‘shouldn’t have a big car if I couldn’t drive it’ Definitely the sort of chap who’d write a blue crayon letter

Good luck finding the culprit!

So the fly-tippers could be disguising themselves as trees...

Never mind Hot Fuzz, it's starting to get like Dad's Army now

It's analytics then, not beams. You can't black off beams and the spiders are normally on analytics (you can get spray to deter them, but putting your infrared away from the camera works better - the heat from them attract insects, which in turn, brings the spiders). I don't think I'm familiar with the platform you are using though because I don't recognise that set up from your pic (although I don't normally be looking at them from a mobile).

The rules, sensitivity, lighting or masking will be the reason for non detection (unless he avoided the camera entirely). Vehicles tend to always be picked up on account of their size and headlights.

Or it could be a system that combines both types of detection. Hikvision can and there are numerous clones of it that do the same.

Ooh I live in a village near tiptree, but mine has a pub and shit all else. I'm very intrigued as to where you are OP.

Awaiting your CCTV footage tonight. How about a bit of entrapment OP? There's two villains we need to catch. We need to catch the flytippers and we need to catch Nigel.

How about pretending complete ignorance and gaily tripping around the village talking about this and that. DO NOT MENTION FLY-TIPPING

Then crank up the cctv to the max and secretly film all night

My money's on Juliet Bravo - wandering around the village in a stab vest - it's the perfect cover for fly-tipping. In fact she might be Nigel as well. Double whammy.

I love this thread.

I wish I lived in a crazy village. I live in a suburb and what we call 'the village ' has two supermarkets and more pubs and bars than you can get through in a crawl without risk of death

We do have a ridiculous facebook page though.

CCTV is scratching his head at how they avoided cameras so I’ll let him know it may be sensitivity. He says he’s moved back road east camera to focus more on the entrance so it should pick up more movement. My app is called “SwannView link” that’s all I know. Thanks for info though

CCTV man

Ooh @Thesearepearls can we set a trap? Put something out there right by the camera that a Nigel simply can't leave alone and has to get out of his car and have a good look at? Garden gnome maybe?

NeverTalks sounds very knowledgeable about CCTV. If vehicles usually trigger it, does this suggest that our perp/Nige/The Moving Finger came on foot? Does that narrow the field at all, OP, or are all Villagers within walking distance?

FlybirdFly, does your post office have a photocopier?

Trust me Queen, I know more about CCTV than I ever would have wanted to. I work for an Alarm Receiving Centre. Basically we have a room manned 24/7 where we receive cctv alerts and fire/burglar alarms etc from all over uk/Ireland and if we pick up intruders, you'll get a phone call. My job is connecting to remote sites, troubleshooting, reducing false activations etc. It's very niche, very random, very nerdy, relentless but actually enjoyable.

I've seen Swann before. From what I can tell it doesn't work with ARCs though. Must check in the morning. If it does, would you be interested in remote monitoring fly? Just thinking of the commission.

What i will say though, is that the Swann systems definitely seem much cheaper than the ones we normally work with (Not trying to imply you are cheap , I can't afford my own cctv (we had one customer spend £18000 on his house alone)), so it might be a case of them just not being as effective as others.

Ooo I grew up in Tiptree! Is the village in question Tollesbury?

I’m jealous of the G&T and your nail polish, mine only stays put for about an hour

@ohfourfoxache...er yes 😬 I am in one of those villages think you can probably guess which one! Please don’t say on here, as much as I am anonymous NDN and village bobby probs wouldn’t want a whole thread about them and RVM is probably lovely and not at all guilty of poison pen letters

Remote monitoring might be a bit beyond us but that’s a fascinating job!

(Vaseline around the cctv lens deters spiders 🕷)

I can’t make up any good comment to place mark.

Biscuit anyone?

I am GRIPPED!

I know where you are too. Am gripped.

Well obviously it was Dcat who delivered the letter. Who better to get around avoiding the CCTV.

ohfourfoxache - looks like a string of swear words to me

Don’t worry, my gob is well and truly shut and I’ve asked HQ to delete my last post just in case