MIL and her picnic hamster

[insancerre]

On a visit to MIL for her birthday
She told us SIL has bought BIL a picnic hamster as a present
After several silent moments during which DH and I tried desperately hard to contain ourselves and not look at each other, she finally announced it was in fact, a picnic hamper
DH calmly said " a hamster is a small, furry creature"

It's comedy gold here
Any good MILisms where you are?

Years ago, a colleague told me her Irish granny had seen in the news years before about Daniella Westbrook's cocaine troubles and the fact that her nose fell apart. She went to visit her and her granny was shocked beyond belief and said [imagine strong Irish accent for full effect] "Can you imagine?! Her scrotum's completely fallen out!" She meant septum of course

My MIL old and Irish. I invited her round on Sunday and she had to go somewhere. She apologised and said she’d jump at the chance normally and would be “there like a car bonnet”.
I think the accent makes it funnier, she comes out with some crackers just cant think of them right now.

My dad referred to a jacket as bisexual, instead of unisex

My dm also is a fan of glory holes. We walked into a small walk in storage room and she announces to a room full of strangers “ooh, there’s a glory hole in here!” I had to bundle her out whilst laughing and quietly whisper in her ear what she had just said. She now uses it on purpose to see me squirm.

My step grandmother also loves talking about pussies! “Oh what a lovely pussy you have. Isn’t it big!”

Years ago when my 6yr old cousin was playing Moon Patrol on the Atari he kept saying he had a "boner" when in fact he meant "bonus".