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Original poster

To have bought ds's teacher a giant kestrel?

365 replies

SilverLining17 · 04/07/2017 11:55

I mean at least she won't get a duplicate and it make a change from 'best teacher' mugs?!

Asked ds what she liked - gardening apparently. DS's class is kestrel class so aha I thought. A little kestrel ornament for the garden. Except it is not little. No no. It is a gigantic genetically modified kestrel. Maybe she can put it at the bottom of the garden so it looks smaller?!

To have bought ds's teacher a giant kestrel?
OP posts:
Thread gallery
20
LogicalPsycho · 04/07/2017 12:51

I love it!

As a trainee teacher I aspire to receive a Kestrel of Doom from a pupil Grin

Original poster
SilverLining17 · 04/07/2017 12:51

He's sat on my kitchen worksurface. Every time I go in he makes me jump.

To have bought ds's teacher a giant kestrel?
OP posts:
MyPatronusIsAUnicorn · 04/07/2017 12:52

"Thanks so much for all the help you've given ds. Here is a horrific kestrel as a token of our appreciation'"

Please write this in the card! 😁

Original poster
SilverLining17 · 04/07/2017 12:52

Yes I guess so - she enjoys her garden though apparently. Or she did pre Kestrel of Doom anyway. So I thought she could sit out there and, erm, admire him.

OP posts:
LogicalPsycho · 04/07/2017 12:56

The DVD is only £2.99 on Amazon. Maybe you can stand him on it as a perch? Grin

To have bought ds's teacher a giant kestrel?
Nikephorus · 04/07/2017 12:57

I think it's a great present. And I bet he gets pride of place in the classroom. The other teachers will be dead envious and secretly hoping that they get their own mascot. Could you make it a habit as DS goes through the school? He'd definitely be remembered then!

rupert23 · 04/07/2017 12:58

Hahaha love it sure the teacher will too

littlebird7 · 04/07/2017 12:59

Hilarious - that is one lucky lucky teacher!!!!!!!! Grin

AllTheWittyNamesAreGone · 04/07/2017 13:00

Teacher:Kestrel is disappointed in your behaviour Jacob, can we do better or does kettle need to sit on the desk?

Jacob: no miss, I will do better, don't bring the kestrel.

Teacher: ok Jacob, but next time...Well you know what happens

MERLYPUSSEDOFF · 04/07/2017 13:00

It can be the class Kestrel that is taken home at weekends Grin. I want one.

HotelEuphoria · 04/07/2017 13:01

I wouldn't expect her to take it home, but if the class are known as the Kestrels it can sit wonderfully on a shelf.....in the classroom.

AllTheWittyNamesAreGone · 04/07/2017 13:01

Kesterel not kettle

littlebird7 · 04/07/2017 13:02

Mypatron - I am going to tenner lady after this thread!!! The accompanying message is just so funny - made my day thank you!

Our class bought a cricket bat for the teacher, not sure if it is to be used by us or by him :) or both depending on whom is being more annoying!

Original poster
SilverLining17 · 04/07/2017 13:02

A really BIG shelf...

OP posts:
SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 04/07/2017 13:03

He's got a very Stern Gaze! He's making me feel a bit worried, and I am only looking at his picture.

He will be the best, and most random Teacher Present in history, @SilverLining17!

BestestBrownies · 04/07/2017 13:03

It could lay a daily 'egg fortune' to keep the little bastards darlings in line e.g. plastic kinder egg innards with cryptic hand-written threat pearl of wisdom inside

Madcats · 04/07/2017 13:03

Was it expensive?

There are 2 sets of magpies trying to defend/take over my garden in a territory battle and I'm getting fed up with the daily cackling/screeching. Something like that might deter them (though probably not).

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE give it to the teacher. DD's school have all manner of mascots (including "Grumpy" from Snow White who sits scowling in the messiest cloakroom each week).

MadMags · 04/07/2017 13:04

Please, please, PLEASE send it with

"Here is a horrific kestrel as a sign of our appreciation."

Please!

rightwhine · 04/07/2017 13:05

I used to have a little chappy that the kids used to compete for. The winning table would win the pleasure of him sitting on their desk. Great to motivate them to tidy their table, get changed for PE etc. Made my life so much easier.

Eolian · 04/07/2017 13:06

I can't stop thinking about kestrel-related lesson ideas now. Thanks for that.

Clearly each half-term the child with the best behaviour/marks/hairdo/fidget spinner skills etc should be allowed to have the Kestrel of Doom on his/her desk for one lesson and therefore sit in judgment over the rest of the class.

SequinsOnEverything · 04/07/2017 13:06

I love him! Please give it to her. No one ever gave me a giant bird when I was teaching Sad

chipscheeseandgravy · 04/07/2017 13:07

If your giving the kestrel a hat, he needs a waistcoat. Can you buy a kestrel waistcoat?

Eolian · 04/07/2017 13:10

Our class bought a cricket bat for the teacher, not sure if it is to be used by us or by him

Ds' (hilarious) primary teacher (who is also the headteacher) has a wooden mallet hanging behind his desk called 'The Attitude Adjustor' Grin. It's a joke, obvs, and the kids adore him. But a parent complained so he took it down. Should have got a kestrel instead.

ShmooBooMoo · 04/07/2017 13:12

ChipsCheese Never mind a waistcoat. What he really needs is one of these:

qi.com/media/14485416791448541646monocle.jpg

ShmooBooMoo · 04/07/2017 13:14

I also love PP's idea of having the Kestrel produce an egg every day, with a little note inside eg riddle, proverb, name of child who's done a kind deed, tried hard that day!

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