Quirky house rules prompted by bitter experience

[KERALA1]

No under 8s allowed to use cling film (rendered unusable)

Windows always to be closed when you go out for day however high up you are (pigeon lays egg in bedroom drama)

Cheap feather boas not allowed in house (purple feathers everywhere for weeks)

Hi folks,

We're sending this thread over to classics now. Brilliant!

Yay! Thank you LornaMumsnet

I love this! I've been reading over some tricky nights.

Ours:
No balls to be thrown at the TV.
No standing on the window ledges naked or in just pants.
Loo brush out of reach.
All small objects to be in a container a 17 month old can't open or up high.
No standing on the dining table triumphantly (17 month old).
DD (3.5) not to carry her brother.
DH must don a top before sitting at the table.
Always lock the front door so the children don't escape.
Some interesting sticks and leaves may be brought into the house in a reasonable quantity, but no feathers.
DH not to ride on the micro scooter.
DD is not to be allowed to hold any cream or lotion as she will slick her entire head of long hair down.

Ooooooh, classics! Do we get a special badge or medal?

No houseplants within reach of toddler
No cat food within reach of crawling baby
No tool box within reach of 4 yr Old in vicinity fathers' sports car

Melanie like a MN version of a Blue Peter badge? For posters who start a thread that ends up in Classics? Great idea

The badges itself will be a simple motif of a stunt pineapple.

And another one.....

Do not leave the wet room door open whilst showering or youngest cat will get in it with you and meow continuously when you turn it off! thought cats hated the shower

No whistling. Ever
Toothbrushes must be rinsed after use before putting back in mug
No wheels in the kitchen
No channel hopping

Driver chooses the tunes.
The cats lie, they have been fed. Don't let them take the piss.
Look interested while DM is interrupting.
No going outside wearing only underpants. (DH)
No Jeremy Kyle when I'm in the house.

No washing the wooden floor with a broken leg.
No petting dogs near radiators.
No running in pyjamas
Enough crockery and cutlery left to eat meal that's been cooked
No Darth Vader balloons
No building work to be done pre march
No slow cooker on carpet
No emptying the weekly shop on the floor
No hairspray near the downstairs window