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Original poster

My foof is buzzing

247 replies

ClopySow · 20/05/2017 09:50

I am not using a vibrator. My phone is not vibrating. No-one is doing mad drilling next to me. I haven't accidentally left an internal vibrating toy up there.

I've had a pretty constant buzzing/vibrating feeling in my groin for about a week now. It's neither pleasant or unpleasant. What the fuck is it?

Is someone phoning my foof? Stop phoning my foof. You've got the wrong number.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
whydoesitalwayshappentome · 20/05/2017 21:20

I just think my a fanny is going to have a voice (and let's face it that had not even occurred to me until today). Then I think a male voice is the way forward.

BelligerentGardenPixies · 20/05/2017 21:21

My foof sounds like Dot Cotton tits. It's forever exclaim "Oo Ar saaay" in the veg isle at Sainsbury's. A little disconcerting for the average unsuspecting shopper tbh.

titsbumfannythelot · 20/05/2017 21:23

Phew. Mine sounds like Dorothy from the golden girls. Thank you for being a friend.

NoTractorsAtTheTable · 20/05/2017 21:25

Jesus, they better not be uploading to the cloud, can you imagine the faces at GCHQ Shock

'There's a bit of odd chatter going on here, what's that noise?'
'Sounds a bit like Liam Neeson. Bit muffled though. Sounds like he's hiding somewhere'
'Who's he chatting to?'
'Morgan Freeman, I think...hey, is there a bee in here? I'm sure something's buzzing...'

Original poster
ClopySow · 20/05/2017 21:33

I actually considered barbara windsor

OP posts:
RagingCunt · 20/05/2017 21:37

Another vote for this thread to go in classics!!

whydoesitalwayshappentome · 20/05/2017 21:44

NoTractors Then Brian Blessed yelling you are about to be fanny tasered!!!

I think GCHQ would completely shut down.

titsbumfannythelot · 20/05/2017 21:45

Do you oft' burst out of your bikini Clopy? Or is it the the screams of Paaaaaaaat during the wee small hours?

3luckystars · 20/05/2017 21:53

They left a bit of the mirena inside you.

That's what it is.

Original poster
ClopySow · 20/05/2017 21:54

I think pat would be better to be honest. Though i'd much rather have liam, but he's taken.

I love Dorothy from the golden girls. Inspired.

OP posts:
slimceagirl · 20/05/2017 22:15

I had that and it was fibroids

slimceagirl · 20/05/2017 22:16

Should have said fibroid pressing on nerves

Shockers · 20/05/2017 22:23

Ahh. I have fibroids and a buzzy foof.

Owlish · 20/05/2017 22:26

I think 3luckystars has it, your mirena is picking up your local taxi cab radio frequency.

whydoesitalwayshappentome · 20/05/2017 22:28

I don't have fibroids and my fanny buzzes and channels Liam Neeson.

(I think it is hormonal)

olderthanyouthink · 20/05/2017 22:28

Someone add Taser Fanny to the MN list of medical conditions. Put it just above Javelin Arse.

ocelot41 · 20/05/2017 22:31

Why not make the most of it? Introduce your foof to a kazoo!

Shockers · 20/05/2017 22:34

I also have javelin arse Blush

Original poster
ClopySow · 20/05/2017 22:50

I never get javelin arse. I get period pains in my coccyx though.

OP posts:
PokemonWanker · 20/05/2017 22:55

I get this and have fibroids too.

I just thought I was incredibly sensitive to passing traffic. Blush

titsbumfannythelot · 20/05/2017 22:55

I get javelin arse in the front bum 😱

Lofari · 20/05/2017 23:05

This thread is hilarious.
What about Michael Caine? Not sure how hed fit though in the world of foof voiceover but bet hed like a mention.

AtlantaGinandTonic · 20/05/2017 23:06

I've had this. I also have PCOS. Perhaps the little lumps in the ovaries are the bees? Shock

WallToWallBastards · 20/05/2017 23:12

I also have PCOS. Is it a PCOS thing? I assumed it would be something awful and deathy Sad

ZuzuMyLittleGingersnap · 21/05/2017 04:45

Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

(Sorry, couldn't resist) Wink

Do all your buzzing/ talking fanjos allow you to answer back, or is it more a case of The Vagina Monologues?

Think would ideally like mine to communicate in a husky, wry Kathleen Turneresque drawl.

OP,
Assuming medical reasons not the cause, I'm utterly baffled by this (non gadget-related) vibrating.
Never even heard of it, let alone experienced this phenomenon myself. Intriguing.
And my Google search history is now buggered...

Adding my vote for this thread to achieve the dizzying heights of MN Classics.
The immortal phrase "When you woke up this morning, would you have imagined for a second that by lunchtime, your fanny would have the voice of Liam Neeson?" deserves nothing less.