Fanny condensation

[ClopySow]

On plastic chairs. Just me?

Please tell me it's not just me. It happened tonight at school parents meeting. Stood up after a nice chat with the maths teacher and there is it, the diamond shaped condensation patch of doom.

I nearly name changed because i am very embarrassed, but fuck it.

So if it's condensation why don't men get it?

And some of you must be walking around with wet knickers if it's so common.

Not sure i've ever uttered these words before, but being a wheelchair user obviously has its perks

That did make me laugh

It's really nothing to do with secretions at all, any more than condensation on a window is.

Warm moist air gets trapped under you when you sit - when you get up it rapidly cools and forms droplets, aka fanny mist/diamond of doom!

I came here via the MN daily email where i misread the thread title as 'fanny condescension '.

I... don't know what i was expecting...

Perhaps men do get it, or the area that comes into contact with the chair doesn't get as warm as the same area on women, or there is naturally less moisture trapped in that area. Like I say, a seemingly bone dry hand will leave condensation on a cold window, so a seemingly dry crotch can on a cold chair. It isn't caused by wet knickers

If it's all to do with condensation, then why don't all women get it?

I sit on my fair share of cold park benches, plastic office chairs etc. It's never happened to me.
I assume my body temperature is normal.

I love fanny farts and haven't had one in years, which is quite disappointing.

I remember my first one, I had no idea such a thing existed and I gasped and then started laughing because it was funny and mental and sort of tickled. As I laughed more came out and it felt as though my fanny was playing the Reveille. It felt like a rite of passage into womanhood.

I am woman, hear my fanny roar!

shatners- no I don't get it.

I don't believe in this condensation theory.

It's sweat,discharge or urine.

Presumably not all women experience it because we're not all anatomically identical?

If it's all to do with condensation, then why don't all women get it?

I imagine it's to do with the topography of your undercarriage - a completely flat undercarriage wouldn't trap any air.

Or if you are 'fortunate' enough to have one which allows a tunnel of free air flow from back to front, you might also avoid the problem

Noel speaks sense.

Why does it have to be a secretion? Is the steam from a pan of potatoes 'potato secretion'?

Secretion sounds more repulsive, which is important when you're trying to make strangers feel bad and in turn make yourself feel better.

glass- the moisture has to come from somewhere,. In the case of a pan of hot potatoes it is undrained cooking water evvaporating,

In the case of making a seat wet it must be vaginal secretions, urine or sweat.

What would you call it then? Sweat? Urine?
Has to be one of these three things.

It's sweat,discharge or urine.

No. It. Isn't.

Seriously.

I've said what I call it.

Minge Mist.

Ordinary air contains water, that's why you get condensation on windows. But yes, I imagine a damp warm undercarriage might contribute some water molecules to the trapped air. That still doesn't mean that the damp patch therefore contains secretions, unless any have actually flowed through your clothes.

Sounds like one of the Impulse body sprays, Noel.

sapphire= it has to come from somewhere- presumably your body. What could it be then? Prosecco?

It must be something exuding from your body.

glasscircles- if it is coming from the air then why doesn't it happen if I leave a cardboard box on a table?

I wonder if my lack of fanny condensation is because my arse is so cold all the time? Fanjo stays warm, but I'm thinking the cold of my butt is enough to cancel it out and ensure I stay condensation free? At last, I've found my chilly bottom's purpose!

Any other non-condensationers care to comment?

The cardboard box isn't warmer than the surface it is sitting on, so it isn't trapping warm air under it.

It is just the way some bodies trap a small amount of air on non porous surfaces when they sit. Really.

If you want to think that it's discharge, urine, sweat, whatever- you crack on. Still not sure why you'd feel so threatened by it though.

Mindtrope - if you put a hot cup of tea on a cold surface for a while and picked it up, it would leave a damp ring, wouldn't it? But the damp ring is water from the air, not tea.