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Really inappropriate funeral thread

243 replies

Wh0dathunkit · 29/07/2014 21:51

So, I'll share mine first.....
Had to decide (without a great deal of getting to know said deceased) what would be the most appropriate music....
We were doing really well. We found "Wish me luck as I wave you goodbye" as the out-tro...
Unfortunately, the CD we used was one of those odd old school ones where it wasn't just the song you were looking for but 2 other songs as well on a single track.
The other track was "Who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler".
Whilst we warned the funeral directors, and they did a great job the first few repeats, a few slips happened. I'm not sure if the rellos found it funny (she was a game old bird), or if they were just too polite to say anything...

Please share, you'll make me feel better!

OP posts:
DuchessofKirkcaldy · 30/07/2014 13:24

My DM just told me she went to a funeral where the priest fell asleep Shock
The whole church was sat quietly, heads bowed in a moment of reflection that seemed to last too long. Mourners were getting fidgety and giving each other the Hmm look when they realised the priest was indeed sleeping. A quick prod from an alterboy and normal service was resumed!

SistersOfPercy · 30/07/2014 13:25

One of the strangest was the funeral of a friend of ours who'd always claimed to have a lot to do with several footballers from our local prem team.
My jaw was on the floor when several of them indeed walked into the crem and afterwards one of them said to DH 'mind if I follow you to the wake, not too sure where it is?'. He then proceeded to lead footballers in their big fancy motors across the city in our little old car DH was of course in awe and the wake was an absolute riot which friend would have loved. I found a lot of respect for those players that day. Lovely bunch of lads but incredibly surreal.

CundtBake · 30/07/2014 13:27

My grandad had a lot of older siblings who were quite close in age so a few years ago there was a period where there were lots of funerals.

We attended one that was very packed, and my 80 year old great uncle had had to stand for the whole thing.

He died a week after and as we left his funeral, my grandmother surprised us all (she had quite full on dementia at the time) by saying 'at least he didn't have to stand for this one.. Grin

thenightsky · 30/07/2014 13:37

At a friend's funeral someone had brought his satnav in, as the crem was notorious for cars being broken into. Just as his DS got up to do the eulogy a disembodied voice announced "you have reached your destination".

The poor boy choked out "Dad would have loved that" and sat down in floods

Grin
Piffpaffpoff · 30/07/2014 13:37

Leaving my Grans funeral at the local crematorium, my brothers and I all got in the same car leaving our parents to go in the official car. We got in, saying nothing, brother 2 in the passenger seat says 'a bit of music I think' and put the radio on. Out boomed ' Ashes to ashes, funk to funky....' I've never seen anyone move so fast to turn a radio off. But it made us laugh anyway on a pretty crappy day.

GwenStacy · 30/07/2014 13:45

At my gran's funeral we came out the crematorium to see a row of wheely bins which, in huge white letters, proclaimed NO HOT ASHES

I got the giggles and the funeral director having also noticed it said he might have a word to get them moved, or at least turned round…

RyanAirVeteran · 30/07/2014 13:56

A friends father died and they did the church and then the crem, when they were leaving the crem the driver indicated right and pulled into the petrol station and promptly filled up with diesel, then got inside realised he had the wrong fuel card, came out got the other one and then could not remember his pin and had to call the office. They were the last to get to the wake. They got a healthy discount.

Windmillsinthesand · 30/07/2014 14:04

At my mum's funeral ,I was 9 months pregnant.
We had the service in the church then had to walk up to the church yard,which seemed like miles,the funeral director said if you need to stop we will.
So puffing and panting and getting a stitch,I had to stop so did everyone else and the coffin.My brother says ,I always knew mum would be late for her own funeral.

edamsavestheday · 30/07/2014 14:07

On the way to my Step-Grandad's funeral, we were delayed by horrendous traffic and really stressed about possibly being late, even though we'd allowed loads of time (very long journey).

Then the tyre blew at 80mph... fortunately just as we'd pass the bit without a hard shoulder. My sister tried to change the wheel, but we'd borrowed my Mum's citroen with weird suspension and couldn't jack it up- Mum had taken the special jack out for some bizarre reason. By now we were in hysterics laughing at how terrible our journey was, because no matter how hard we tried we were doomed.

It was before mobiles, so I got out and walked down the hard shoulder to use the public phone. The only black suit I had back then had quite a short skirt... and I had high heels... and my sister and I were in our early 20s... as I walked back, two cars, a van, and even a lorry pulled into see if they could help us! I'm sure these knights in shining armour would have stopped anyway but can't help thinking the skirt and heels and youth might have had something to do with it.

Managed to change the wheel and arrived at the church just as the doors burst open with the coffin coming out. We flattened ourselves against the wall and filed in behind the crowd, hoping to pass off as merely late rather than having missed it. All afternoon my Gran kept talking in detail about the service, trying to work out which bits we'd seen and which we'd missed.

Then we tried to follow the funeral cars to the crem, about 40 miles away as he was being buried next to his first wife (had been married to her for 30 years, met my Gran later in life when they'd both been widowed). I'd been expecting the hearse to go very slowly but once we got on the motorway it zoomed to about 80 and we were so surprised we lost it! More hysteria as we had No Idea At All where the crematorium was and had never been to the town concerned.

Plomino · 30/07/2014 14:23

Was on the way to a friend's husbands funeral , queuing in a line of traffic off a roundabout , when I get some prat in an Audi TT try to basically shove me off the road to get into my space . I stand my ground , and feed him into the oncoming traffic , for which I get treated to a barrel load of abuse and gesticulating . I ignore him, and go through a set of traffic lights , leaving him behind . Get to the friends house where we've been asked to meet , park the car , and meet my friend and her family , together with a large proportion of my work colleagues . We're standing there waiting for the cars to arrive , when the same Audi TT pulls up , parks across someone's drive , and the gesticulating idiot gets out saying 'sorry I'm late ( he wasn't) some stupid fucking cunt held me up . '

So I turned round , smiled sweetly at him , and said 'that'll be me then. Now I can hear you, what was it you were trying quite so hard to tell me ?" He went a bit white, and then went off to read the tributes . Friend turned to me and said "he was DH's friend , I always thought he was a wanker "

3dolls · 30/07/2014 14:37

dm called me to day my grandad's last surviving sibling had passed away.

me: gosh that was a bit unexpected

dm: not really she was nearly 102

we still laugh about that dopey moment!

tb · 30/07/2014 14:59

For those of you who are surprised by the speed of a hearse, don't be.

I used to stop at a paper shop on my way to work that was near the Southern Cem in Manchester, and the owner of the shop, I think, was a retired copper. The world of pall-bearers and undertakers is a small one, and he knew I liked cars.

The day before, he'd been out with his mates, test-driving a possible new hearse near Altrichcham crem out in the lanes near to Dunham Massey. The test vehicle in question had a 5 litre Cosworth engine in it.

Think about it, a hearse has to carry the deceased and up to 6 strapping blokes to carry the body into the church/Crem. It could have a payload of 6 x 16 stone - imagine 6 x 6ft ex coppers, built to be impressive in their pointy hats, plus the deceased in their chipboard veneered with oak etc coffin who could weigh 20 stone, dead weight if you pardon the pun.

Then after the Crem, they have to get back at the speed of light to the depot for the next one.

He told me I should let him know if I could go along for the next test drive.....

Then there was the one about the widow and the curate and the ashes.
A widow was in the car with the urn carrying her late husband's ashes for burial. Due to the sadness of the occasion she hadn't felt like driving, so the curate kindly offered to do this. On the way to the burial they were pulled over by the police.....the curate didn't have his driving licence with him, or proof of identity etc, and the police were about to ask him to accompany them to the station. The situation was saved by the lady presenting her driving licence to vouch for the Curate.

At the morning after a wedding at University, we were all discussing holiday jobs, as you do.
One student had spent his holiday working as a porter as Birmingham's main accident hospital. There had been a freak hailstorm in June, and the mortuary was at the bottom of a steep ramp. Unfortunately, the same day, a building worker of Irish origin had returned to work after lunch, and died after a wall collapsed and fell on him. He had weighed some 16 stone. The student had the body on the trolley and let go of it at the top of the slope, where due to ice - an unforseen circumstance - the trolley went out of control and hit the wall at the end. His opinion was that if the gentleman hadn't been dead after the wall fell on him at work, he would have been when hitting the wall at the bottom of the ramp leading to the mortuary.

Another student had a friend who worked at an undertakers somewhere in the Wigan area. He was sacked when his habit of re-arranging the faces of the recently-departed into gurning expressions was discovered by grieving relatives.

Mil My late mil's funeral was a complete farce. DH due to grief left discussing the arrangements with the vicar to his elder brother and sister, something he still regrets over 20 years later. Mil was a member of the Communist party at the time of the Civil War in Spain, but also had deep religious convictions, and loved both the prayer book and the King James bible. She was psychic, and a landlord died after she reportedly put the evil eye on him after he increased the rent - illegally. Just to give a rounded picture.

The service at the Crem bore no resemblence to any CofE form of worship I have ever encountered. The Crem had an organist of the type in pleated skirt, sandles and cardie persuaded to play during the organist's holiday. At any and every moment where you would have expected a prayer, tilly mint, burst into a rousing chorus of "Keep the red flag flying here". Just before the curtains came around the Vicar asked us to stand for a final moment - for prayer? No, to honour mil's commitment to the socialist cause and another rousing burst of the Red Flag. On the way out, looking at the flowers, and somewhat stunned, the Red Rev shot past in his Astra, winding down the window to apologise for his car being blue and not red, as he didn't have any choice in his 'business vehicle'.

We avoided the wake, bil being on one side of the holy river and sil being on the other, as it would have caused a row had we gone to one and not the other. We changed out of our funeral attire in Tesco's toilets in Allerton our own farewells down at the Albert Dock.

To top it all, sil kept the change out of the money that mil had saved for her funeral as she told me it was "owed to her" for looking after her dm who she didn't care two hoots about. She just felt entitled. Mil died without a will and just left the money in sil's care to pay for her funeral. Mil would have wanted it to go to her 7 grand-children, and 1 great-grandchild alive at the time she died in 1993.

ruby1234 · 30/07/2014 15:02

For my MIL's funeral, she had chose a certain funerally hymn to be played (can't think what it was now). The undertaker kindly said he had a copy and would bring it himself. The vicar announced the hymn and said MIL was very fond of it, and on it came...... sounded like it was being sung by drunkards and recorded in a tin bucket at the bottom of a well. Clearly the undertaker had provided a copy of a coy of a copy. Lots of shoulders going up and down as people tried not to laugh.

At my Grandad's funeral, he was cremated a long way from his home town, so my mum decided to have a memorial service back in his home town and invite all his old mates. Grandad's ashes were in a small wooden box for the service, and afterwards the box was solemnly buried in the grave of my Nana.

Obviously there was a small heap of soil which had been dug out for the box. The funeral director started filling in the hole and realised there would be too much soil, he called over his colleague who brought another spade, and between them they whacked the spare soil into the hole - think Tom and Jerry like overhead pounding - bit inappropriate but very funny!
Two very elderly gents were holding each other up and gingerly tottering back to the cars, another guest said 'I don't know why them old buggers are bothering to go home'!

LindyHemming · 30/07/2014 15:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Thumbwitch · 30/07/2014 15:23

Some real gems on this thread!

My nanna's funeral - I was devastated when she died suddenly of a massive heart attack and the funeral was one of the saddest days of my life - but was leavened slightly by one of the front pall bearers slipping on the wet grass and dropping his corner of the coffin just as he got to the grave - he nearly went in and they just saved the coffin from going in at high speed too!

A friend of my parents' - her funeral was held entirely in the crematorium as her family refused to hold a church service for her (contentious) but they had Guide me oh thou Great Redeemer as one of the hymns. Backed by a tape. My Dad is a great one for belting out the chorus of this, including the extra male-voice line - but unfortunately the tape didn't allow for this, so by the second verse, the congregation were behind the tape by at least a line. The chap presiding over the service (not sure if he was a vicar or not, tbh!) had the good sense to switch the tape off after the second verse and we carried the tune along without it.

Peaceloveandbiscuits · 30/07/2014 15:55

At my grandmother's funeral I didn't realise that no one else stood up to leave until the family had all left, and I wanted to sit and listen to the music playing, so I sat and had a little weep for a few minutes while everyone else awkwardly sat and watched me. No one told me I was supposed to leave first! Not funny but I still get embarrassed thinking about it.

OnlyLovers · 30/07/2014 16:14

At my gran's funeral we came out the crematorium to see a row of wheely bins which, in huge white letters, proclaimed NO HOT ASHES

That's just fucking fantastic. Grin Grin Grin

enormouse · 30/07/2014 16:16

I was extremely heavily pregnant at Dps uncles funeral.
I was being introduced to some relatives who politely asked when the baby was due.
"Wednesday"
"Oh. Goodness. That's so soon"
"I mean. Last Wednesday".
At which point DMil and Dp burst into fits of laughter.

The weirdest part of the day was DFil who came up to me shortly after this exchange and indiscreetly whispered he had been making enquiries and had found a paediatrician, a psychiatrist, a vet and the reverend. Who would sort me out, should anything unexpected happen.

squoosh · 30/07/2014 16:19

"Well at least she didn't die of anything serious"

HILARIOUS!

FatherReboolaConundrum · 30/07/2014 18:26

Mum and dad and I remembered it fondly for years afterwards squoosh until mum and dad also died from nothing serious.The same great aunt was also famous in the family for explaining the immaturity of some young male relative with the words "of course, a girl of 18 is much more of a woman than a boy of 18 is".

LetThereBeCupcakes · 30/07/2014 19:11

Before I begin, there are 2 things you need to know. One, my grandmother was 4 feet 11. Two, she had 2 sons, 3 grandsons, and 3 grandson-in-laws.

When my grandmother passed away, DH and I arrived at the crem to be told by my uncle that "all of the important men in her life would be pallbearers." This meant my Dad, my uncle, and all 6 grandsons. (including the married-in ones).

Did I mention my grandmother was 4 feet 11? Short people have short coffins. Fact. You cannot easily fit 4 adult men on each side of the coffin of a person who was 4 feet 11. They were unable to take full sized steps and were forced to shuffle instead.

I also should have mentioned that one of my cousins was of a similar stature to my grandmother, due to his growth being stunted when he had leukaemia as a child. In contrast, my dad is 6 feet 4. My Dad was positioned on the back right hand corner of the coffin. My shorter cousin was on the front left. This unfortunate set-up, coupled with the enforced shuffling, meant that grandma's coffin was perilously balanced and tilted alarmingly. As they shuffled up the aisle, the coffin was slipping further and further forward.

Everybody had been told that they were NOT to lift their arms to support the coffin. It must be carried on their shoulders. None of them wanted to be the person who broke the rules and grabbed hold of the coffin.

The shuffling was soon accompanied by shoulder twitches as everybody desperately tried to manoeuvre the coffin into a more stable position. The shuffling became faster and faster, the twitching more and more frantic, as the eight of them sped towards the altar (altar? not sure). They arrived at the front of the crem just in time to let Dear Old Grandma slide elegantly forwards and onto the altar. Everybody stood and stared for a moment, amazed that they Grandma had made it, before tugging down their shirts, turning around, and taking their seats.

Clutterbugsmum · 30/07/2014 19:14

I start by saying my dad didn't believe in the 'afterlife', but the minute he died my front door slammed but there was no one there. I was asleep on the sofa (I was 7 1/2mth pg with a non sleeping 15mth old). I rang my mum and said he had died.

At his funeral he had 'Hey you, don't sit on my cloud' by the Rolling Stones as the coffin went behind the curtains which tickled me.

At my granddad's funeral 8 weeks later the minister was upset that she missed him coming into the crematorium surrounded by my uncles Harley Chapter.

barrywhite · 30/07/2014 19:21

NC'd for this:
At FIL's funeral, the family had chosen one of his favourite songs, Barry White's My First My last My Everything to be played as we left the church behind the coffin for the burial. In itself it is probably not an obvious choice, as it is quite up-tempo, but was compounded by lots of confusion around the playing of it.

The vicar was a bit scatty, and forgot the last hym. So when the Barry White music started, instead of moving forward to walk behind the coffin, all the family were pointing to their order of service and gesturing to the vicar (I would have just gone with it, but MIL quite rightly wanted the whole service she had agreed!). So there was a slightly confusing scene whilst the vicar gestured to the church volunteer sitting at the back with the CD player to switch it off, and then got the service back on track. Then at the end of the hymn, when it really was time for Barry White, the church volunteer didn't understand how to go back to the beginning of the track now he'd started it once, so there was a long silence until DH got up, walked all the way from the front to the back of the church to operate the CD player, then all the way back to the front to walk behind the coffin. It doesn't seem as funny in the telling, but at the time the juxtaposition of the sombre occasion, bursts of non-sombre Barry WHite at the wrong times, and the sheer terror on the face of the poor old volunteer in the face of something as sophisticated as a CD player made me want to laugh.

My dad tells me the vicar also gave some comic relief before the service started. Dad was one of the first there, and the vicar and the organist were trying to time how much music could be played as the vicar walked in with the coffin. But everytime the vicar started walking in to the music, a new guest would arrive and the vicar woukld forget what he was doing and stop to talk to them, then have to go back and start all over again. Apparently this went on for ages before he got all the way

littlewhitebag · 30/07/2014 19:30

My first DD died when she was aged 5. My younger DD was 3 and my niece 4 at the time. At the tea afterwards they went into the toilets for ages and everyone who went in came out smiling. They then came out with all the sanitary towel bags which they had stuffed with loo paper and gave out "party bags" for DD's party! It really cheered up what was, frankly, a very shit day.

ContentedSidewinder · 30/07/2014 19:37

At my uncle's funeral, my aunty had requested a specific retired priest to preside over the funeral as he had taught my uncle at school.

Unfortunately time had not been good to the retired priest and his memory wasn't what it should have been.

When talking about my uncle, he clearly couldn't remember his name and kept looking at the coffin to read the name plaque! He also patted the coffin, in a jovial manner. Ah, John, John, John he said. He was clearly trying to commit the name to memory.

The whole bench was shaking with everyone laughing, as he once again struggled for the name and seriously peered at the name plaque Grin We are seriously considering him for the next funeral.

Just last week, my FIL went to see my lovely MIL laid to rest in the coffin before having the coffin sealed. As my FIL left the chapel of rest he said to the funeral director, right then, wheel her back to the fridge!

He turned to see a horrified couple who were in the waiting room. I bet they thought he had quietly seen to her demise. Sadly she had died of cancer and he loved her so so much. It was his way of dealing with it all.