Help! My son just touched a working class boy

[fairyfly]

What shall i wash him with?

but pikelets are scotch pancakes, not crumpets

What's a dimp?

Ring Jeremy Kyle FF, he'll know what to do.

Or as Olive has suggessted - real life stories in Pick me up, Chat or Take a Break. Not that I read them of course. No. I'm off to a French Chateau this weekend to eat Foie Gras Mille Fuille. Very middle class.

Scotch pancakes are Drop Scones.
Pikelets have holes in them.

A dimp is a cigarette that has been smoked and thrown on the floor, the filter bit. Common people pick them up to get the last dregs and to make their fingers yellow.

I AM SUPPOSED TO BE A BLOODY ACCOUNTANT, GET ME OFF THIS FRIGGING SITE PLEASE.

I deduced that dimps were the left over bits from cigarettes

My Mum calls Crumpets Pikeletts. If she stays at my house and I offer her a crumpet she tells me off for being all posh.

'Back kitchen' is another WC phrase, I always say 'it's in teh back kitchen' asif I have a front one

I insist they are squashed crumpets, they are lovely and they are in the isles of M and S, i'm allowed to look through the window of my local one if i put all the trollies back.

Pikelets does sound sweet.

A dimp is a fag butt, if you collect them in a tin you can make a rolly out of the dog ends. Then you empty your kids money box and go to the workys for half a mild.

They were always pikelts in our house. 'Crumpets' sounded very Enid Blyton.
The ones from the baker were much bigger than the ones in packets in Tesco.

I would ring Geremy Kyle but he's busy enough trying to work out who is the father of my child.

And if your lucky, there might be a turn on in the worky's.

Geremy ?

That says it all really.

Slightly off track, but when watching Trisha once (I was b/feeding and couldn't reach the remote okay????), they did DNA tests on 2 men to see who was the father and it turned out to be neither of them!

The woman said "but it must be one of them, deffo" and Trisha had to kindly explain DNA to her and that it wasn't. Priceless.

im having an identity crisis dont know what class im supposed to be!! got very posh mum and dad lived in a big posh house (up north though so lose a few points!) went to a posh girls school went to polytechnic - to thick for uni! met ex who was terribly posh ! floppy haired rugby playing bloke who hates "commoners" became and air hostess(definately not posh) became single mum retrained as beauty therapist - providing a much needed service in fake tans fake nails ear piercing refuse to do babies though. dd wears lots of pink and had burberry type pram - is mamas and papas posh or chav? even had pink mothercare buggy, she eats sausage rolls drinks fruit shoots - but prefers fruit shoot flavoured water at moment dont know what a turkey twizzle is but if she would eat it then she can have it! has chicken nuggets if we go to mcdonalds but in my defence i do have an annabel carmel book so im not crap mummy all the time!
dont know what people define chav as anymore but if its someone who wears designer labels lots of sparkly jewellery then its me cant work out why posh, jordan, colleen whatsit with rooney are chavs and then dole scrounging scum are chavs!!

i really am confused from watford and if someone can help me i will be very grateful!

I met a producer for Trisha once and she told me that when the "guests" turn up they've often had their hair done/bought summat posh and the production team then gives them a "makeunder" to make them look more schemy/chav/common.

i kind of think that'd be a fun job.

Well that's the thing that I have learnt today - absolutely never realised that the term "crumpet", as in baked goods, was posh.

What do they do then? Knock a few teeth out and give them a hicky?

stick em in clothes 2 sizes too small and add some fake bling I guess!

Meowmix, have you been watching what I dress my kids in

As my friend used to say, 'I love Peasants.... each year at Christmas we string one up from the ceiling for sport'

(I can say that coz I is common- you lot can't coz you're all posh gits)

AS ong as we're taking the piss out of 'Private School posh idiots ' the that's alright sin't it?
All in the spirit of fun and camaradarie and that reverse snobbery thing that goes on everywhere.

Threads like this make me sick and you can all slate me if you will (and i'm sure you will, one will mock others will follow) am not really bothered!

and yes i can't type for toffee!

isn't it taking the piss out of all and sundry whatever their snobbery? we're all guilty of this, tribal instincts and all that!

I think it ha just been a piss take out of anyone in general tbh. Myself included.

Actually, if we are going to blast stereotypes, i currently object to people on the 'dole' as 'scroungers' who 'sit on their ass all day'.

But, am pmsl at this thread!