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Original poster

Overheard in a change room yesterday

381 replies

Jacksmania · 08/07/2011 17:57

A mum telling her daughter that the style of dress she was trying on was called "UMPIRE waist".

I'm sorry, I know I'm a total caaaahhhh, but I was Grin and and covering my mouth to keep from laughing.

What have you overheard (not necessarily in a change room) that made you :o?

OP posts:
FreePeaceSweet · 10/07/2011 11:49

I'm actually quite proud of this one. ds who was 5 at the time had been present at a family do. My two brothers and mum got drunk and started having a go at me. I was boring...up my own arse etc. (I was pregnant and suffering from spd, so not really in a sociable or happy mood). The next time we saw them ds stood in the centre of the room with his hands on his hips. He then declared that anyone who was mean to his Mummy was nasty and had to leave. Then he said with a wagging finger. "That means you Uncle Simon and you Nana!" I was impressed that my son stuck up for me off his own back. He was only 5 at the time.

mythical · 10/07/2011 11:56

I overheard two young (not older than 11) girls in a changing room. Their mums were running around getting clothes for them

Girl1 : he totally ruined my valentines day so i'm going to ruin his birthday!
Girl2 : why. What did he do??
Girl1 : he gave me LIKE only 20 quid.. It was okay though, the Other guy gave me 30.
Girl2 : oh my gawd, 20 quid?
Lots of laughter

I was like...... I didn't get 20 quid for valentines, what the hell!

Raahh · 10/07/2011 12:08

I have said this before on here- but last year whilst pregnant, went to loo with dd (3 at the time). DD1 asks loudly why my bits are hairy. And carries on asking. To which i reply-
'to keep the baby warm'BlushGrin.

I couldn't make eye contact with anyone when I left the cubicle.

She is now insistent I am having another baby. DD2 is 10 months old- I am very conscious I look 11 months pregnant- so thanks, DD1!Grin

lemonmousse · 10/07/2011 12:11

When my DD's were about 5 and 4 we were waiting in Newcastle airport for our flight to Menorca an elderley couple started chatting to them about their holidays and told them that they (the couple) were off to Corfu.

"Oh" says DD1 "We've been there - haven't we Mammy? That's where Daddy pooed his pants in the sea wasn't it?"

Cue very red faced DH and a rather startled couple of pensioners Grin

Empusa · 10/07/2011 12:17

When I worked in a clothes shop we sold these awful t-shirts which said "3 some" on the front.

A small child had grabbed one off the rail and was waving it at her mum, while the mum was desperately trying to ignore it.

"mummy mummy!! mummy!!!! look at this!!! you like these don't you?"

StealthPolarBear · 10/07/2011 12:23

FPS, fantastic son. I hope they were siutable ashamed

Notquitegrownup · 10/07/2011 12:26

Nickschick Grin Grin - great Headmisstress!

SinicalSal · 10/07/2011 12:41

Oh jee had a genuine lol there at the round of applause for pooing mummy!

FreePeaceSweet · 10/07/2011 13:20

StealthPolarBear Yep. They went silent and avoided eye contact. This made ds worse as he just stood there going "Hellooooooooo? Any Bod-Dee hear me?" [hgrin]

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 10/07/2011 13:35

FreePeace - I love your DS. [hgrin]

shandyleer · 10/07/2011 13:48

Overheard in the fruit and veg aisle of the supermarket :

Lady number 1: "That's a strange place to put the tomatoes".

Lady number 2: "Yes it is, isn't it?"

Huh?

begonyabampot · 10/07/2011 14:21

DS in a busy shopping mall, 'mummy, what do you call those bomb things you fire out of ships and things... ah muslims! Me, 'no son, that would be missiles'.

LineRunner · 10/07/2011 14:34

Stealth RE: the woman who announced 'I'm sorry I'm late for my interview, but I've had rather a lot to drink' - given that she was quite posh, all flowing hair and long skirts, and this was in Newcsatle, we all pissed ourselves.

The Receptionist kept a straight face though and simply said, 'Room 5, please.'

Tas1 · 10/07/2011 14:53

I was bathing DD who was about 4 at the time. DH came rushing in to use the loo (he'd been holding on for ages but just couldn't hang on any longer). He tried to keep his back to her so she didn't see anything but alas it didn't work........."Mummy, whats Daddy doing to that slug?"

bunkers · 10/07/2011 15:13

I was listening to a carol concert last Christmas. The leader of the ensemble was telling the story of the nativity and told the whole crowd (which was in a popular tourist spot and therefore very large) that Jesus was 'born in a manger - a type of barn' Grin

StealthPolarBear · 10/07/2011 15:22

oh dear...
Did he also receive gold, a frankenstein mask and some brut aftershave?

chillistars · 10/07/2011 15:22

oh yes, put them in a changing room and they turn into little aliens. Is it just my three who can be little angels but then get them all in a family changing room and they turn into obnoxious brats who you want to disown?
Blush
Why do they do it? Confused

Cedise · 10/07/2011 15:26

When DD was about 5 she had no bum at all and any trousers/jeans just kept slipping down showing a couple of inches of bum-crack. I would point and say "Say no to crack!" and she'd giggle and pull them up. Of course one day we were in a car park, this huge builder-type guy got out of a car and his trousers were at half mast, and DD dutifully points and yells out "Say no to crack!" Blush

Original poster
Jacksmania · 10/07/2011 17:26

Overheard this at barbecue party yesterday: young bloke asking host, "hey x, where are the Hibachi balls?"

We were all Confused until we figured out he wanted the bocce balls... :o

OP posts:
Original poster
Jacksmania · 10/07/2011 17:28

Oh, and recently in a toilet cubicle:
DS: "Mummy, the flower on your bum is so pretty! Mummy, can I touch the flower on your bum? It's soooooo beauuuuutiful!"

I have a magnolia bloom tattooed on my hip. Heaven knows what anyone outside thought... another here who came out making no eye contact.

OP posts:
LadyClariceCannockMonty · 10/07/2011 17:36

In gym changing room:

Woman 1: Those are some serious boots.

Woman 2: Yes, well I'm going to kick some serious arse.

setara · 10/07/2011 17:44

stood outside a jewellery shop in derbyshire (where i live) having a nosey.

Smartly dressed woman next to us says to her husband

"Oh how quaint, i didn't realise they would have jewellery shops round here" Hmm

excuse me while i get back to my whittling Grin

nickschick · 10/07/2011 18:22

notquitegrownup ...the worst thing was she told me about this several times after (i worked in the school) it became a bit of a joke she thought ds3 was going to say something entirely different and had her answer ready unfortunately he shocked her so much that was the only reply she could think of.

lazarusb · 10/07/2011 19:39

Climbing the stairs in one of the towers at Warwick Castle. An American lady said loudly to her husband "You'd think they'd put elevators in these nowadays".

EverythingsNotRosie · 10/07/2011 20:00

A large gentleman by the name of "Uncle Gary" from Yorkshire waddling around the Louvre. When he finally got to the Mona Lisa (moaning the whole way that his feet hurt) he said "It's a bit fuckin' small!" There are no words.

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