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Original poster

Blackbird in my bedroom! Get it out! Get it out!

399 replies

HumperdinkFangboner · 12/05/2011 07:12

what do I do?!

I have NEVER moved so fast, was in bed it flew in the window like a bat out of hell and I've ran out slamming the door behind me.

Now tell me it's likely to fly out on his accord whilst I do the school run?

OP posts:
Bohica · 12/05/2011 13:04

Don't feed it it will shit even more everywhere.

Does anyone know the mating call of a big black bird? You could try to woe it through the bedroom window.

Suncottage · 12/05/2011 13:12

OP

Get the box set of Worzel Gummidge dvd's and then go out for the afternoon with one playing.

Jackdaws are so clever he will work out how to use the remote to change the disc over and make himself a sandwich.

moominmad · 12/05/2011 13:15

Is it out now? aw bless

NotShortImFunSized · 12/05/2011 13:20

I am in hysterics here, not the same kind of you though Humperdink, sorry Grin

Hope he's gone soon.

KatieMiddleton · 12/05/2011 13:22

Start roasting some potatoes OP. He might get the hint...

HippyHippopotamus · 12/05/2011 13:34

i was quite dignified til i read about getting bird seed out of OP's hair. sorry, now i'm laughing

SwearyMary · 12/05/2011 13:34

Poor bird must be terrified. Are any neighbours around yet? I would be tempted to ring the fire brigade (and hope they bring the big red truck) Grin
Hope you are ok, OP!

BaronessOrczy · 12/05/2011 13:43

Oh bless you OP, I'd be terrified too. My cat once bought in a magpie. Fortunately a neighbour was around and he dealt with it. So I don't have any advice.

Sorry.

Poor bird though, he must be terrified.

keep · 12/05/2011 14:03

Are any of your children being bullied at school?

If so, entice the bird into a large gift box and go and visit the bully with your 'peace offering' telling the parents that you hope their child will enjoy playing with their new Furreal Jackdaw.

Firkytoodle · 12/05/2011 14:07

You need to get hold of one of [[http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=www.charlievegas.co.uk/uploads/items/image6451.jpg&imgrefurl=www.charlievegas.co.uk/products-645.htm&usg=__pll8cQcbleZgrricFEs0Ac-Ca5w=&h=600&w=433&sz=59&hl=en&start=78&zoom=1&tbnid=5z9klPe2C2p-dM:&tbnh=154&tbnw=109&ei=0trLTdapEoSGhQfDkuCoAg&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dcrow%2Bcostume%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26hs%3Dk7q%26sa%3DX%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-GB:official%26biw%3D1503%26bih%3D633%26tbm%3Disch0%2C1328&itbs=1&iact=rc&dur=347&page=4&ndsp=29&ved=1t:429,r:3,s:78&tx=74&ty=109&biw=1503&bih=633 these] OP.

Go in, sit quietly on the bed and gain its trust.

Then perch jauntily on the window sill so it can see where the exit is.

If this fails you may have to fly out of the window to properly demonstrate both technique and escape route.

But that has to be better than waiting until 6pm with a marauding child devouring demon blackbird in your bedroom, surely?

boilingpoint · 12/05/2011 14:12

Op have you tried reasoning with it?

Like proper eye contact soft words etc?
There could be a reason the crow is acting out? I ran over a pigeon the other day, the next day there was bird shit covering my car!!

Bird karma!

Fimbo · 12/05/2011 14:15

We had a pigeon who flew into dd's bedroom once. It lay dying under her desk. She called down to me and told her not to be so silly. But sure enough there was the creature. I called dh home from work. Twas easier because it was dying.

Anyone think this is worthy of classics? Grin

MrsPlesWearsAFez · 12/05/2011 14:18

Have you considered serenading it with ?

It may be both suitably charmed and susceptible to the underlying message.

Original poster
HumperdinkFangboner · 12/05/2011 14:26

I wonder if letting it out of the bedroom would be a good idea? I could open the French doors.

I do run the risk of it trashing the rest of the house and/or snatching the baby as we run for the front door.

I feel uneasy knowing it's up there.

OP posts:
keep · 12/05/2011 14:35

The problem you have is that birds usually come in flocks.

If Captain Beaky up there decides your bedroom is much nicer than spending another freezing cold night up a tree with the branches waving wildly in wild, not to mention those ruddy squirrels having the music turned up waaaaaay past 11 most nights, it stands to reason he will stay put and it won't be long before the rest of the flock come looking for him and you end up with a flock of Jackdaws squatting in your bedroom.

keep · 12/05/2011 14:37

Wind no wild ^^

It's such a shame that no one uses bellow anymore. They'd be perfect in a situation like this.

MrsCampbellBlack · 12/05/2011 14:39

Good lord - its still there!! Do you not have neighbours - go and get someone to get it out - it will destroy all your stuff and insurance will not pay out

MoreBeta · 12/05/2011 14:42

OK here is the plan.

Run dwn to local estate agent and put your house on the market. Then go to a local hotel and book in. Accept the first offer you get before DH gets back form Scotland and you'll never have to go back to the house again.

Honestly your DH will never figure out what happened. Grin

Bohica · 12/05/2011 14:45

Fimbo I popped back to sugest Classics.

Sorry op, not much help & I do feel for you as I scream out loud & duck if a pigeon flies anywhere near me.

I phoned our local fire station station on a non emergency number when a bird flew down our chimney, they sent a man in a red van to help. I thought he would be really cross with me but when he saw the state I was in he was actually very calming & nice Blush

ImeldaM · 12/05/2011 14:53

Open window as wide as poss, close door & don't scare it any more, it will go out. Crows etc are very clever

Once went into my spare room to find pigeon sitting on sofabed, window was open really wide so just flew in.

Suncottage · 12/05/2011 14:57

Can we name him?

Wordwork · 12/05/2011 14:58

I think so Suncottage -- no superinjunction as far as I know.

BaronessOrczy · 12/05/2011 14:59

This has reminded me of the time I woke up at university to find a seagull sitting on the end of my bed looking at me.

I screamed and threw the duvet over it.

Cue half the corridor rushing in to see if I was being murdered.

I wasn't wearing any pj's...

Not sure who was more startled, me, the bird, or everyone else.

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