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A dog shat on my picnic

197 replies

marmaladetwatkins · 18/04/2011 12:55

So I threw all of my picnic food in the bin because it made me feel like vomiting my spleen out. DH says I was being a bit OTT but honestly, I do not like dog shit.

WIBU to waste food after a dog shit on my picnic blanket?

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GetOrfMoiLand · 18/04/2011 13:33


DON'T say that out loud.

I said i would kick a dog up the arse once on a thread with Valhalla on it.

Wasn't a good idea.
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GetOrfMoiLand · 18/04/2011 13:34

I hope you didn't throw the beer away.

I thought Rola Cola was an urban myth! Had no idea it actually existed.

i used to buy panda pops because I felt sorry for the pandas on the bottle (same as I used to cry about all the left behind teddy bears at car boot sales Sad)

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thefirstMrsDeVere · 18/04/2011 13:35

I had a three legged dog once.

It was very handy. He didnt have to stop to do a week.

Not having a back leg to cock he could keep moving.

{disaclaimer} He NEVER shat on a mat ever.

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geordieminx · 18/04/2011 13:35

PMSL

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KenDoddsDadsDog · 18/04/2011 13:35

I am trying not to collapse laughing at my desk. Bum gravy ha ha. This is like a letter to Viz.

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JarethTheGoblinKing · 18/04/2011 13:36

Hassled, I believe I clarifies the shit/shat pedantry further up thread


Grin

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washnomore · 18/04/2011 13:40
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Glitterknickaz · 18/04/2011 13:45

Don't want lunch now.

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Vallhala · 18/04/2011 13:45
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WalterFlipschicks · 18/04/2011 13:47

washnomore Grin I have face pain!

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marmaladetwatkins · 18/04/2011 13:48

The dog's front leg was missing rather than it's hind leg which made it look even more bizarre as he advanced towards our lovely country picnic...

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WalterFlipschicks · 18/04/2011 13:53

I know I should have learned but do not google three legged dog shit sorry

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GetOrfMoiLand · 18/04/2011 13:57

Waaaaah

Clings on to edge of thread 'Marmalaaade, help meeeeeeee...............'

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marmaladetwatkins · 18/04/2011 13:58

That little dog looks quite cute doing his three-legged cack, compared to the heaving, drooling, panting dog-pig-idiot that emptied his guts on my picnic.

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nonickname3 · 18/04/2011 14:04

YAB a bit U...if it was only the edge of the blanket and your DH cleaned it up then I don't see why you couldn't have got on and enjoyed the picnic and the rest of the day. But it is pretty gross!!

However - one of the best bits of advise I've ever been given is NEVER sit under a tree in the park as that's exactely where dogs like to do their business!!

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limitedperiodonly · 18/04/2011 14:05

I feel bad about saying this but you'll never get over an experience like that.

Twenty years ago DH (then boyfriend) inadvertently laid the picnic rug on some dogshit. I sat there for about an hour, scanning the surrounding grass, before it dawned on me that the smell was coming from under the blanket.

The smell of dogshit always takes me back there. It's like madeleines but not as highbrow.

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marmaladetwatkins · 18/04/2011 14:05

"However - one of the best bits of advise I've ever been given is NEVER sit under a tree in the park as that's exactely where dogs like to do their business!!"

Funny. That's precisely what DH said after the event...

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PinkFondantFancy · 18/04/2011 14:06

marmalade even more importantly, where do you get Rola Cola from????? YANBU BTW, I would have done the same, except I would have been dry heaving too....

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marmaladetwatkins · 18/04/2011 14:08

My mum said that she got the Rola Cola from Asda and it was a pound a bottle. A pound! I think that Rola Cola has got ideas above its station since Peter Kay made it part of his stand-up routine...

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picmaestress · 18/04/2011 14:09

There I was thinking that AIBU had got really weird and a bit dull lately, and along comes this thread. I just laughed non-stop for 10 minutes. Dog crossed with a pig, oh god, I have to keep taking my glasses off to wipe my eyes!

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diddl · 18/04/2011 14:09

Were you in a park?

If so, aren´t dogs supposed to be kept on a lead?

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diddl · 18/04/2011 14:10

(Sorry, not that that´s much helpBlush)

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Hassled · 18/04/2011 14:13

"It's like madeleines but not as highbrow." :o :o

And Marmalade, what you need to do now is draw the whole thing. Quick, while it's still fresh in your mind. We need the 3 legged dog/pig hybrid, the poppadoms, the pattern of the blanket, the pattern of the shit, the Munchian scream look on your face. Then scan it in, upload it and it will be as if we had a photo. If you can't do it, how about your DS? How's he with the felt-tips?

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WalterFlipschicks · 18/04/2011 14:18

The pattern of the blanket is bound to be generic green/red tartan at that price Grin

Did you bin it, god forbid you washed it

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PinkFondantFancy · 18/04/2011 14:22

A pound a bottle for Rola Cola??? What a joke!

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