lost in translation... is this the most embarrassing comment someone could make in all innocence?

[oricella]

Posted this before in bilingual, but it deserves a wider audience..

My dad recently stated that my lovely 2 year old was acting like a cat, 'giving heads'.... (the Dutch expression 'kopjes geven' describes the way cats nudge you with their head)

That one had me under the table... (and blush at having to try and explain to him why!)

Anyone else have any good mistranslations?

I can remember my first winter here in France. Unlike in the UK when it's cold it's a very dry cold, and I suffer from dry skin. I can remember meaning to say that my cheeks were dry and cold, and somehow, managed to say that my arse was instead . No doubt in 50 years time dd will be pointed out as the lady whose English mother had a cold arse in winter.

My friend, while in Italy, wanted succo di pompelmo (grapefruit juice). In fact they asked for succo di pompino (juice of a blow job)

friend of mine asked in French if she could fuck the radiator. 'to turn down/lower' and 'to fuck' are very close in pronunciation

FIL was in a meeting in Geneva once and was a lot of talk about "onus" . At the end the Swiss MD said "Can you please explain onus to me. I know anus but not onus".

My friend asked a barman for a wank in Spain when all she wanted was a drinking straw... Paja means wank but it also means straw as in hay bale, pajita is the word for a drinking straw I think.

fuck the radiator - just put me over the edge,i;m literally crying laughing now

Not exactly a mistranslation but.....

I work for a telecoms company and sat in a meeting once, where my Dutch speaking colleague insisted that we needed a server based solution as he couldn't "have his guys wasting their time playing round with their dongles when out in the car"

I nearly turned purple with mirth and the poor guy had no clue why I found it so hysterically funny.

At language courses in the foreign country we were living in a relative mixed up the words television and fiancee - when asked do you have a tv to entertain you in the evening he replied no I have my wife. a friend of mine mixed up little tea spoons and nipples - the girl in the jewellers was a bit surprised when this weird english guy asked if he could buy some silver nipples.

I want to know what a mars bar party is too

An Australian girl at work was complaining to her stuffy rather grand English boss that the builders kept whistling and leering at her. She commented "if it carries on Im going to have to start wearing pants". English boss turns puce and flees room in embarrassment. Other colleague has to explain the pants/knickers thing we have in England

do you want to actually know what a Mars Bar party is? This being MN and all? Because at the moment, I'm thinking it's a chocolate bar themed party, with say, melted mars bars on ice cream and all that. Much like a lemon party used to be a lemon-based one. I would rather live in innocence, thank you very much.

Me too! WTF is a mars bar party?!

My friend once tried asking for batteries in a French hotel, but ended up asking the receptionist if he had piles

A mars bar party is something saddos talked about at school to make themselves sound cool and grown up. I am sure no one ever actually went to one. Why ruin chocolate.

Loving this thread btw

Also a bit when my Aussie friend talks about men being a real 'spunk'

a german friend in the us at a big wedding. when asked how the best man's speech was: "pathetic"...
in german "pathetisch" means with lots of emotion/with emphasis.

MIL once told me she nearly reversed her car into a bollock .

I think she meant bollard.

My uncle was abroad somewhere and was out for a meal. He was asked if he would like any more to eat. He replied that he was replete. This was received with gasps and stares. In that country replete means pregnant!

My mum's friend went on a foreign exchange (french I think), when the host mother came to her room to ask if she was settling in ok she replied what she thought was "yes I'm getting myself organised" but the daughter explained to her later she had actually said "yes my periods are regular"

from what i have heard - not having been to one - a mars bar party is when a mars bar is apparently used to give sexual pleavure and then it's eaten afterwards

the lady next door is an aussie and i was also weak when she started talking about real spunk

In Afrikaans, a doos is a box - it is also slang for c**t : I didn't make a good impression at all ...

My American boss once caused a great deal of suppressed mirth when I turned up in her office for an appointment and she was in the middle of an unexpected phone call:
(hand over the receiver) "sorry guys, I'm afraid I'm going to have to blow you all off!'

in more transatlantic hilarity, I inadvertently caused a similar incident by complaining loudly that a particular corporate procedure was a total FAG. which, in my defence, it WAS.

lol @ "if it carries on Im going to have to start wearing pants"

Instead of saying 'it's very warm' to my gruff Hungarian FIL, I came out with 'you're very gay.' There's only a single letters' difference.

oh, transatlantic hilarity is great - I had a friend in the Czech Republic who always asked his american colleagues if they knew where he could bum a fag. He said it sorted out the wheat from the chaff fairly rapidly :o

Oh, and I asked a czech police officer if he was a shelf once - then when I explained I was foreign, he said "I know" :o (police = shelf, policie = police in czech...)

Apologies for the misplaced apostrophe!