D'y ever wonder how life got like this?

[FrumpyGrumpy]

New to MN but like what I read so far. Struggling to get by day by day at the minute and feeling isolated but not enough to make the effort to join in the 'groups' the whole world seems to think are just what I need!!!!

Have daughter of 4 and girl and boy twins of eight months. Not had time since they were born when all three kids have been well, am I just cursed? Throw in a house move that took 6 months, a partner that works away most of the week and a mother-in-law I can wait another lifetime to deal with and I've ended up the sort of person I used to look at and wonder how life got like that.

Anyone give me hope that when the babes are eighteen months I'll feel better?!! If not, anyone tell me that alternate nights of gin then chocolate is an ok passage through?

Thanks lovely girls. I should be in the shower and preparing to bed early since DT1 really not right and DD had big runny bottom and sore tummy tonight and prob wont make it to school tomorrow. Thanks for kind words and practical advice. It all makes sense, I just get hugely frustrated and worry that I will regret this time. I find this age the hardest, was fine with newborns up to around 10 months then this age til around 2 I find tough. Maybe I just have to accept that and move on. I also hate feeling on my own with it all for most of the time but we have lots of things in our lives we wouldn't have without the sacrifice of dp being away and its not forever.....

Mars I take dd to a gym and ballet class once a week, the walk is our time. Last week I tried to make xmas angel decorations with her in a time pressured 45 minutes, by the time we started it was time to tidy up and they remain unfinished. None of it feels relaxed or spontaneous and thats whats tough. However, I maybe need to build on it somehow so we feel we have something just for us and I need to bite my lip if I get uptight. I feel I have sooooo much more to offer and no patience or time, its frustrating but I need to remind myself that 20 minutes rolling around the floor is as good if not better than the other stuff.

Shakespeare shhmakespear!!!! I'm ashamed to say I don't know any apart from R & J. Did watch the modern adaptation on Monday night of Much Ado and did like it but its not really our man is it! Good on you doll. How long till the move?

Kelly, wise words, beautifully put and it saves me again. Thanks honey.

Off for a shower and a cry to get the rest out, then I'll think about the poo/sickness laundry and food - but not together!

Ah, no rain, no rainbow x.

Cheers TMP I guess we all ride this train together!

Kelly I reread your post and you are right, the future is so much brighter with them all together and it would be nothing if she grew up without them.

Have done nothing tonight so far and DT 2 now coughing his lungs up!!!!! Must do some work before someone wakes .....

FG.. snap, just read your post and you have put into words what I have been going through lately. Dd 4.5, dts 11m and I find myself doing exactly the same, I expect so much from her as does dh and we just forget she is only 4, she has always been an angel, everybody tells me what a lovely child she is but at the moment all I seem to do is nag her and scold her for the slightest misdemeanor and in return I can see her behaviour changing towards me and I know it's because she's frustrated and angry. It's so hard to find a balance and be able to share yourself equally among the three of them and I hate myself for some of the things i've said to her and how I keep trying to curb her from doing the things children do just to make life a little easier for me. Today we all visited a friend and dd ran absolute riot with her two friends, the house looked like bomb had hit it and they had a blast just being kids, I was totally on edge thinking look at the mess and god knows what the neighbours are thinking and my friend was "Don't worry, it only takes ten minutes to clear up!" and she was right and dd was the happiest I've seen her in a long while

draper... this too will pass.

Don't worry honey. We all say and do things that we regret. DD2 is currently the butt of everything in this household. Poor babe is only 7, but like you all, we expect more of her.

Haven't the energy to beat myself, but know I must do better.

They are amazingly forgiving and resilient. It will all come good. Try thinking about all the good things you've done with your DD. Bet it outweighs all the bad. We're not good at looking at the good things are we? Only takes one bad thing to throw us.

You're doing well!

FG:somehow I don't think my tutors will like Shakespeare Schmakespeare.... however, will endeavour to use your terminology whenever and wherever I can! lol

I wanted to see that modern adaption of much ado, but dp isn't a shakespeare fan at all. Did u see it mars? When I did a level english we were told to watch all sorts of diff adaptations to get a feel for different interpretations. I love much ado - so funny. I really enjoy shakespeare full stop. Wonder if I could get away with doing aa306 for my third year.

I need to get myself in gear, I haven't applied for next year yet. I'm still kind of debating whether to do two courses with mobile dts would be too much. I'll def do at least one tho.

tmp - i say 'why did I get two?' at least once a week! Today I was thinking it when Akshay managed to finish a bottle, two biscuits and a large jar of food before deciding he was full, when I have three others who also want tea. Akshay is just a sitting, laughing poo making machine - eats and poos all day long, great fun.

didn't see it either. Can't remember what I was doing. Am spending a lot of time awake at night with cold filled twins though!

poor dts, hope they better soon.

I was up last ngiht with ds, vommitting and poo-ing everywhere. My life seems full of poo atm.

how come all the dt's are ill? is it just the time of year? 1 of mine has had chicken pox in the last 2 weeks and I am just waiting for number 2 to get it. It has been 16 days now. Still am glad it's only chicken pox, feeling sorry for you kelly, i'm not good with poo and vomit.

hello ladies thought I would check in and have just been reading all the latest posts. I seem to be spending most of my time these days pulling the DTs off the wine rack/sofa/glass cabinets/fireplace etc etc. They now spend their days pulling each others hair and hitting each other on the head. One of them bit another child at nursery the other day.....and they turn 1 on Sunday. Somebody please tell me it gets easier.

I wish I could harrogatemum lol..... I'm sure it must do.... round about age 25

I think it's the time of year. Wishing all the DTs better!

yikes - am just feeling sorry for myself as had big night out with work last night and trying to look after DTs with the DTs!!! Ha ha!

number 2's got it! think he is going to be covered as he has far more spots after 1 day than his brother had in total. Will now not be able to take him to his cousins birthday party tomorrow.

How are they doing tmp?

Are you feelign better fg?

Harrogate mum, mine are heading towards that - isn't it fun? Dt1, Ravi, is getting quicker at crawling. He is getting all over the place now, trying the stairs too. He is trying to pull up on things. He spends most of the day either attacking the coffee table, or the stuff ont he tv unit. He learned how to open the ps2 dvd drawer and loves that. He also loves jumping on the others - climbs all over them laughing manically. He's only 7 months! I'm dreading it when dt2 starts as well, he can get around well enough rolling as it is.

crawling seems such a long time ago, it makes me feel really old! mine will be 3yrs next month. no 2 is really unwell, crying all the time, he is covered in the spots, they are in his ears, on his eye lids, on the rims of his eyes, he's not eating so am presuming they are in his mouth aswell although he won't let me look. his glands are also up, am not sure if this is because of the chicken pox or just aswell as?
hope you are all ok

Hey girls, just checking in but not for long. We too are in the middle of poo/vomit syndrome (so far 4 out of 5 of us had it (I've escaped so far, must be the gin!!! ). Its neon yellow and very sour. DT2 has a cold as well, anyone for migrating for winter? Thinking The Seychelles ....... wanna? Go on, you know you want to. Isn't it tedious wearing layers of coats and feeling like the honey monster. I mean some of us have lithe, supple, soft, hair free bodies that no one can appreciate LMAO!

Just done the Tesco shopping online and snuck on for a quickie but I see you girls are off being REAL mums . Have lost very important tickets for a ballet that dd and I are going to tomorrow night (first time she's been out to a show after bedtime) and panicking a bit, I remember putting them in a safe place and have been looking at them for weeks and thinking how good its going to be. Now they are not there . Going to breathe deeply and calmly begin again.

Repeat after me, think it and it will happen, think it and it will happen .......

have you found them fg?

I'm so amazed at ravi. He is now pulling himself up on everythign and starting to cruise. He's a monkey, wants to climb everything. Looks liek he will be walkign well before his birthday. Akshay is doing well too, up on all fours now and can sit up from being on his belly, so hopefully he will get there soon.

Are yours on the mend tmp?

Oh god did I look and look and look and had really not many places to look because the safe ones are so limited. In the end I found them in my banking folder at the back with my chequebook and doctors stuff. They were very safe and if I ever need somewhere to hide or be safe in I'll remember its a really, really good place that is difficult to find PHEW!!

So guess what! I'm going to the ballet with dd, tonight, might put on something nice (like Chanel No 5, my fav). We'll be leaving just as the DTs go to bed and dd is gonna love that, just hope she can stay awake! The online shopping arrives when we're out so dp will be the one to put it all away (he's great and would do it without thinking but its just lovely for it not to have to be me).

Oh Kelly, your man Ravi sounds like he's going to be 'helping' you with so much very soon. DD used to run to me and say "quick mum we've got an andrex puppy" because DT2 loved getting hold of the end of the toilet roll and running! It does look fantastic but isn't very nice having to drip dry . How's the house coming along? Not too quiet?

Hey Mars, how's life treating you?

Oh that's good, glad you find them. Have fun. I doubt you'll have any trouble keeping her up.

The house is still waaay too quiet, but I'm workign on it. Found a twins club in Bracknell I'm going to go along too and looking for more mother and toddler groups too. Once I start meeting people I'll be ok.

hiya FG.... have been busy packing for my move next week. I can start moving things in next week before the official date on Saturday.

Can't move for boxes here! Have packed the kitchen down to the bare essentials. 1 plate, 1 bowl, 1 cup, 1 glass each lol

Getting so so excited. Can't believe it! Can't wait.

I'm really looking forward to putting my gorgeous lovely desk in my childfree lounge... by the window. [sigh]

Gotta run. A Christmas Bazaar to go to and also my friend's jewellery party... with lots of lovely mulled wine.

See ya soon!

hi kelly, can't believe your little men are on the move, how time flies, wonder if ravi will walk before his birthday? fg, glad you found the tickets, hope you and dd have had a great time. Mars, can't imagine how you are coping packing up a house with 5 children! am hoping the chicken pox are nearly over here, dt2 has now had it for a week, he is much better. my house is freezing, this really must be winter, Had forgotten about the fights we had last year to put on hats and gloves... here we go again
take care all

Am getting PJs and rooms ready for bed and just want to say you girls keep me going more than you know. x Thanks.

toomany.... I never said I was coping lol.

Went to the new house today. Have bought some tester pots for DD1's room and the DTs room. Though I'm already convinced that I love the colours. DD1 loves the bright fuschia pink that I've bought for her room.

DS1 can't be bothered, but I'm gonna give some serious thought to his room. He's about to be 13, so I have to be careful not to be too twee in my ideas.

I've bought a second hand sofa and sofabed for my lounge. Lovely terracotta colour. I think I want a coffee table....ooh decisions decisions.

The DTs are happily unpacking boxes as fast as I can pack them. Ah the joys........!

The problem with moving is that I'm not sure if I've told all the people that I need to tell that I'm moving (and I don't mean personal friends.... I mean official people like the gasboard and electricity etc).

Can't believe I only have a few days to go before I'm in. The DTs love the house, as do the others. It has a real sense of peace in it which I'm sure we'll shatter within seconds of being there! lol

ooh u must be so busy mars. Good luck with the move and I hope you are all very happy in your new home. Sounds liek you've got it all sussed. We're gettign settled and it's much better now I have the car to explore. We're off to windsor today.

Did u have a good time fg?

My house is freezing too. Not used to this house business, the floors get soo cold! WE were in the top flat ebfore, and the floors were always warmer than this.

Hi girls. Kelly I hugely enjoyed the ballet, what a novelty to be out after dark, but dd nearly fell asleep in my arms!!

Over the last two weeks I've nursed all 4 other family members through sickness, diarrhoea and nasty coughs/colds. I was delighted to escape....... Today I'm nursing myself but thankfully only with a nasty chesty thing, sore throat and body. Roll on tonight when hopefully I'll send myself to bed early.

Mars honey, good luck with it all, there is soooo much to do on top of the usual routine. Remember to stand still sometimes .