d'ya every wonder how life carried on and on and on.....

[Kelly1978]

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Too much waffling, you know who you are

I jsut wanted to psot to say good luck hm, hope you can hold out, but it really sounds like things are moving. Jsut think you could be cuddled upw ith your baby by tomorrow morning!

Glad to hear dt2 is better, fg.

Oh overrunderthemistletoe you poor thing, sounds like you're having a pretty crappy time of it at the moment, my 2 love calpol and would have done exactly the same.

I'll tell you what DT1 said this morning, should make you smile at least! They were playing together whilst I was faffing about, tidying, washing etc, heard a couple of squawks from them, so I said 'are you being good girls?' 'well' said DT1 'I was being good a minute ago mummy' I had to run and hide before she heard me laughing

Im sitting here singing frumpy the grumpy reindeer now! I think dd will like that.

overun, I would guess but I've had a glass of wine already and my brain isn't on it. Will check out your link in a sec tho.

charleymouse, is that you? Hope everything is going ok for you?

sw was round on sat in the end. I ignored him as much as poss (one of the advantages of being hearing impaired ) and off he went on his merry way. I got an update from my lovely hv in the end. No real news to report, except that I am stillg oing to have my childminder for the next few months so I am planning a haircut on thurs (not had it done since august) to pamper myself. I think I am finally getting myself together again - even wearing contacts again AND quitting fags, after starting again when the whole ss thing erupted. Please send your best fag free vibes this way! The only thing left is to sort the not sleeping. I did stop the pills but I'm still regularly waking between 2-4am. Why does everything always seem so much worse in the middle of the night?

and anyhow, the dts - they've swapped shifts. dt1 is being an angel and dt2 is a menace. we've rearranged the lounge again to make more space and are having regular dance competitions to wear them out!

Hope everyone else is well. hm, I don't have cat, never got round to setting it up, but I would love to see a piccie, can you email me on [email protected].

kelly I always wake around 2-4am, I have done for as long as I can remember. I tried Botanics (Boots) lavender gel on my pulse points and that seemed to work til I got used to it...glad to hear the sw has been and gone & you get to stick with cm for a while longer good luck with the fags!

Kelly my love, I'm so glad you are seeing things from left of the middle again, and put those damn fags down, I'll never kiss you under the mistletoe stinking like that . Overrun, I'm off to read your thread.......

p.s. my DP is being very grumpy tonight and I've no idea why...life is as crap as it always is and I'm smiling

Kelly, it is worry that does it. You need to manage it somehow. To get back to sleep, either :

(1) make a brief list and tell yourself you will start ticking things off in the morning

(2) write a detailed list along with physical outcomes

(3) imagine all that is worrying you, then surround it inside a large balloon with a string, imagine cutting those strings and watch it float off

(4) other such things that a more valued person could come up with, how about asking if you could have a couple of sessions with a counsellor to get you through all that has happened?

(By the way on the feeling depressed threads (me? never?!!!) someone posted a free, online CBT trial (cognitive behaviour therapy, its what I had last year), might be quicker than NHS.....)

Sorry if none makes sense, I need a wee and DP is nearly upstairs and Im typing soooo fast....

tell me abt it, fg, my dp 3was like that on sun. I have to put up with them for 5 days and he was stressed on the second!

I'm all fresh, on day 3 now!

I'm immune to boots lavander too. I have soem herbal tablets which are helping a bit, but I did sucumb to a tamazepan last night

Hi Kelly, thanks for posting on my thread. its funny how dts do the good cop bad cop thing? Well done about the fags, I am an ex smoker and its easy to go back in times of need. Unfortunately mine are both the bad cop atm. I didn't know that you are hearing impaired, if anything that should work to your advantage with ssd, being a bit cynical I would say, they would fall over themselves not to be seen to discriminate against a mother with a disability iyswim
My dts are driving me mad, I spent the morning screaming at them. I can see exactly how dt1 got the capol now btw. I had to repeatedly get him down from the arm of the sofa, he then leans over with his arms outstretched and lands on the mantlepeice, and then works along with his hands. Until his body is completely extended over the gap. Just picture the mission impossible music and you get the idea lol

oh and hm, I've forgotten twice now but the best ever recomendation I ever had for sore nipples is kamisolan. It is made from beeswax and works wonders.

Hm, I second the kamisolan recommendation. Hi Frumpy, I can't understand how I managed to keep previous boyfriends when they didnt smoke, must have been shit hot in bed lol

how do they do it! I've found tht with my dts though, they really do manage the impossible. Hope it makes you feel better about yourself though - no way you could have foreseen that!

Might have to play on my 'disability' a bit more now. They know, but it's easy for them to forget because I lipread and my speech caught up by the time I was 10 or so so it isn;t really noticeable. My only real worry now is that they are going to contact my (violent) xp. My sw senior supervisor thinks he should be contacted. I'm jsut praying that he doesn't decide to get in touch.

dp doesnt smoke. Originally he put up with it, but he hates it! It was him that originally nagged me to quit.

Now MUST stop thinkign abt smoking....

kelly, it is so shit that they feel they have to contact him. I take it you have been able to present them with police evidence etc, rather than just your word on it?
I think ssd end up having to follow the law to the letter and sometimes it can seem plain stupid even to the sw who is forced to implement this.

multiple mums please excuse my irrelevant rantings!

overun, I don't really want to full this thread with my problems, plus it gets a bit techinical in a ss sense, I know you offered me to cat you a few times and I never got round to setting it up. If you do get a chance to chat offmn, my email addy/msn is [email protected]. Don't worry too much tho, I know you have your hands full as it is! Plus if this is your job, I'm sure you don;'t want to be doing it in your spare time!
My sw is useless - hasn't provided them with any evidence. I don't think there are any records from police, or woman's aid (refuge) but I have suggested other avenues where i am pretty sure they could get proof. But they are saying they need evidence of current risk, which how do I prove when I left him so there isn't current risk, only on the basis that he doesnt knwo where I am IYKWIM. I would have thought that the fact that he abused 3 woman concurrently would be enough but evidently not. My sw said there is no statue that states that my exh shud be contacted, it is more a matter of protocol I think.
TBH i feel like attempting to cut off all contact with ss, but I'm not sure if I can really do that. I jsut feel so frustrated with them when I personally have done nothing wrong yet havin to listen to someone else telling me what is best for my kids.

oooh Kelly , I've gone all shy. Rant on.....

Overrun, I posted a book on your thread.....

DD's little friend whose daddy is terminally ill, is still at school, looking a bit pale. He has been taken into hospital and looks like it won't be long before he passes away. I know there is never a good time to lose your husband/daddy but why so close to Christmas? I bought the children some wonderful books (some recommended on here) and I took soup and muffins up last weekend. I wish I could do more.

Hug your husbands, DPs and children. We love them desperately no matter how much our patience gets tested.

Hello all, sos sorry to hear the sw are being a pain in the ass again Kelly. It is so frustrating that you have done nothing wrong but have to endure this.

FG that poor family, i dont know what to say. Im sure you are doing more than most to help them.

My Dh comes home this weekend, i go to the ball on Friday (night away from the kids) and we come back saturday... Am so pleased, exp is being about as awful as can be at the moment and im not handling it so well. I thought i might have cried the baby out last night.

I cant wait for xmas, i feel like i really need it this year

Am off to make snowmen cakes this morning, another xmas fair on friday! In laws are taking the kids though as i will be swishing about in my new dress looking all glam....

enjoy your ball largegin, sounds like you deserve a good night.

how terrible to hear that fg.

FG that's such sad, sad news. I'm sure they welcome all the support you give them.

My latest (and last) growth scan today showed both twins now measuring more or less on target. Consultant booked me in for induction just before xmas (21st) and has now washed his hands of me and about to go off on hol.

My "neat" bump has exploded out in all directions. And iron levels have finally dropped low enough to warrant supplements. Explains the renewed cravings for steak I've been having recently.

Everything is making me blub. DS latest nursery book mentions death and I couldn't read it to him without sobbing, (bring back the pic dictionary all is forgiven). DC and I sat down to watch The Snowman yesterday. BIG mistake, not sure which of the three of us cried the most.

Virgin, you enjoy that ball my love and don't give a monkeys about exp. Let your hair down and relax a while, and make sure you have the biggest fry up the next morning!

Pixi, my goodness a couple of little christmas babies!! I had lost track of your dates. What help have you for when they arrive? I totally empathise with crying at everything, I am a very emotional person and find myself welling up at the most inconvenient times. I found waiting for each of my babies to arrive was emotional because, although I wanted to see them, I was aware life was going to change and I've always found that a difficult thing. Allow yourself some weepy time, its normal and it keeps you sane. Watching The Snowman would just tip you over the edge, especially at this time of year!!!

I'm taking dd1 to see the show in a couple of weeks (its silent like the film but with beautiful music and dancing, I saw it about 3/4 years ago when she was too little) and with me replaying my feelings about our last christmas I'm sure I will get through most of it with a couple of tissues stuck up each nostril, pretending all is fine, then explaining I have an allergy and that is why my face is red and swollen when the lights go up . AND I'M NOT EVEN PREGNANT!!!!! Take care my darling and come here and talk whenever you need to xxx.

FG wow I admire your bravery in going to see the show. I had to tell DS I was only crying because HE was so upset. Having kids has turned me into such a wimp, I used to cry without tears but now I'm like a fountain.

As for the immenent arrival, DH will have two weeks paternity leave and my mum will take a few weeks off after so I will have help for the first month. Although with DH it'll be more of a case of 5 kids to look after...

Home Start said they'll find me a volunteer for a couple of hours once a week from next month. I've been looking into finding a student but no luck as yet.

Not sure I like the idea of inducing so if I'm still mobile and coping I'll postpone till after xmas. Just wanted to get the consultant off my back.

DD is still sick. Her nose is streaming but it seems to finally be clearing her chest. She has turned into a screaming monster and I'm starting to run out of sympathy when I feel so crap myself.

Piximon fab news about those babies, how lovely to have them in time for xmas. You will be able to eat a full xmas dinner with all that extra space in there

If your iron levels are low dont take the nast iron tablets they give you or you will be all blocked up iykwim. Take fluradix, it is great, not tasting great but does work. Also nettle tea which is not too bad to drink is worth a go too, looks like grass!

FG you must have read my pitiful story, thanks for the kind words. Im trying not to think about it. Dh will be home with me on sat and he can do all the talking and thinking for a few weeks. I feel like ive had enough and dont have the strength anymore to deal with it. I just want someone else to take over for a while. Im looking forward to xmas and swithing off..

Hope everyone else is ok...

Pixi... I'm just off to work. Call me later if you want to talk through the whole induction thing. Will pencil 21st into my diary in case you decide to go for it, but... well probably easier if we talk. Glad the babies are a good size again. Can't stop must run, will probably text to remind you that I'm about later or I'll call when I get in.

FG.... just being the friend that you are is what will matter.

lg&t, HM, Overrun, Kelly etc... have been reading your posts but have been so busy. 2 births last week and lots of postnatal stuff to do.

Love to you all Keep an eye out for any newbies that I may have collared in the streets and sent here. LOL

Pixi, my sympathies! Kids dodgy health, pregnancy and christmas coming all adds up to a bit of a build up of stress. Are you using everything you can for your DD? Vicks on the chest, Olbas on the clothes, Calpol, Nurofen, plug-in thing at night for easier breathing.......I tend to go for everything to make it as easy as possible, including fruit juice ice lollies for sore throats. Good luck.

Virgin, you hang on, you will go to the ball and you will feel better for it.

I have so much to do, lists everywhere, head spinning and I don't actually know where to start. Lists are my best friend but I'm needing to shake some off.......

Hi Marsy

Pixi - induction right before christmas ! It sounds as if it would be something convenient for the consultant but not really for you.

Kelly, keep talking to us about your stuff. If I reply now I will be here forever, but i am reading and sympathising. I don't see what any of this situation has to do with your violent xp! How is your dp coping with everything now?

As for the crying - FG, you have said exactly how I feel at the moment, I've been feeling a bit low the last couple of days (partly because I'm struggling to fight off a bad cold which is draining me), but its more that as you say it 'I found waiting for each of my babies to arrive was emotional because, although I wanted to see them, I was aware life was going to change'.

As for me, today I had to go to do the whole big glucose tolerance test (drinking disgusting glucose solution, three blood tests etc). They were very nice and gave me a bed ot lie down on so I had a bit of a sleep while i was there. Yesterday for somereason I got really stressed and in the evening I had quite strong regular contractions for a couple of hours (but not painful, just like multipe bhs). I had a bath and they seemed to die down. At the hospital today they checked me over while I was there. And everything is fine (phew!), they lectured me abouthow important it is to not get stressed. i had a scan which was really wonderful as I could quite clearly see one of the babies faces ! He/she is of course beautiful :O! One babies is now head down, the ohter head up so the bum in the air time is working well, just got to get the other one to turn now and then keep them both head down for the next 14-ish weeks!

Mars is it ok if I email you? Can you remind me of your email address as if I start looking for it here i will be here all day!