Went through our finances and we're fucked.

I was 29,000 in debt.Got a debt relief order.No mortgage planned for me,housing association rented house.can finally sleep at night.Unsure if you are keen on a mortgage,hence being apprehensive, but honestly.Things can her sorted.Debt can be sorted.Please keep going xxx

Can you cut back on anything? We have a bit less income than you but both work & drive 14 year old car, just have fire stick with Netflix, rarely eat out, careful with wasting food etc.

Can you work? I went back when mine were 4 months & 6 months as DH had only just qualified as teacher and salary was really low.

You need to look at what you're overspending on. Do you hire expensive car, get lots of take outs, spend money taking kids out instead of doing free stuff like museums, parks etc...

Can I suggest you get some advice, my father use to volunteer for the citizens advice (he was an accountant before he retired), he would spend hours helping people in your situation. It sometimes helps for a new set of eyes to look at the problem and work out a solution

Can you speak to step change?

They can help deal with your creditors and may be able to stop the interest on your debt

From the debt listed the priority is the CT, is it still with the council or has it been sent to debt collectors?

Also the payday loans, the interest on those is really high, how long have you got left to pay on them?

Agree with @ZeroFucksGivenToday

Get selling on vinted. I used to have to sell on eBay to get money for Christmas. My kids now sell on vinted & it's really easy.

Also do cheap Christmas. I hate all the pressure to buy big gifts.

Phone Step Change 0800 138 1111. Monday to Friday 8am to 8pm and Saturday 9am to 2pm
https://www.stepchange.org

So clear the CT debt first, forget everything else
Then you will feel loads better and it's a priority. Pick the highest interest one next and clear that

Christmas - what I loved most as a child was little rituals
So we would always watch the same film, with duvets and popcorn and some hot chocolate on Christmas Eve. And another day we would have a meal of "scraps" (oven beige food!) laid out like a buffet. Obviously it depends how old they are and it sounds cheesy but that's the stuff they will remember. Or that one present they've wanted and wanted, you don't need to get loads

Food - any room on cutting that down?
It's not always practical but cash helps me, I draw X amount out for a week and that's it, I can see what I have. I budget food for the month so £240pm for me, if I overspend one week I tot it up so I know next week needs to be cheaper

Speak to step change and get yourself on moneysaving expert website on the forum debt free wannabe. They will help you so much there and loads in much worse debt

I'd recommend getting in touch with CAP they do lots of work around helping negotiate more manageable loan repayments, they take on the contract with lenders so you only deal with them and they'll work out a repayment plan that's liveable and help you develop a better budget.

eBay!

If your chronic over spenders I guarantee you have 2-5k worth of crap in your home. Google the price of everything! You would be amazed! That empty iPhone box -£20.

I racked up quite a bit of debt, living above my means
I downloaded this app called " debt pay off planner " its american but you can change the currency to £
entered all my debt amounts and how much I pay back monthly and it works out a plan for you and shows the date you will be debt free

its such a simple thing but I like that you can see all of the debt organised and a visual end date of when I'll be clear of the debts

that and a spending budget, the app encourages you to want to spend less so you can throw more money at the debt and watch it get smaller and smaller

Have a look here for ideas too: https://debtcamel.co.uk/

When I was skint, We lived out of the freezer one week a month. I shopped at cheap places like Farmfoods for as much as I could, then Aldi, I only bought absolute essentials from the more expensive supermarkets. Do you have a market where you could shop for meat, fish, fruit & veg? You can save money if you can, I had a butcher who had a lorry on the estate I lived on one morning a week, I used to try & buy meat packs that I could freeze. A pack usually had a kilo of beef mince, a roasting joint, pork chops, bacon & sausages, I could split the pack between probably 8 meals, split the mince in half, cook bolognaise & chilli with one half which started as bolognaise & then added spices & chilli for the second night, I always had some to freeze, then the other half I made burgers & shepherd's pie. The roasting joint did Sunday lunch, then Monday tea cold with chips & enough left for sandwiches, the sausages did two nights with either chips or mash, the pork chops did a mid week dinner with roast potatoes, stuffing, apple sauce, veg & gravy. With everything I bought from Farmfoods & Aldi plus the meat pack, I could feed me & ds for £100 a fortnight, we never went short, Friday night was pizza night, pizzas were only £1.50 from Farmfoods, garlic bread £1, so for £4 I could give us a treat night. Do you have a slow cooker? They are brilliant for cooking cheap meals. Look on moneysavingexpert.com for more ways to save money.

Stop…..and breathe….. it is solvable….not by panicking and it will take time.

i have had credit scores on the absolute floor, and have been made bankrupt which affected me for years but it is recoverable, this is from someone who has been there and couldn’t get a phone contract, or a normal bank account etc and had to play the ‘game’ the get back up and running - it really can be sorted

Debt Payoff Planner – The #1 App to Plan and Track Your Payoff here is the link, just change the setting to £, its free x