Based on our salary can we afford a child ?

[Fitness247]

I live in Scotland with my partner of 6 years in a 1 bed council flat in the city centre, I’m nearly 30, partners 35 and we’re thinking of having a child but I’m worried about finances.

I work in the healthcare/care sector getting £16k partner is on £17k so pretty low salaries but our city/lifestyle is very cheap. When we have a child I would work p/t as obviously childcare would cost more then my salary so not worth it. We are able to buy our flat then in 5 years we can sell it and buy a 2-3 bed flat/house in cash due to council discount. My family are able to help for childcare if I work part time.

I can try to increase my salary but that’s not guaranteed in my sector as it’s badly paid even at manager level but obviously will try to get better pay in the future.

I’ve done the sums and this is the result: salary per month = £2,300 (roughly)

Rent/or mortgage = £300
Water/gas etc = £250
Cars x 2 (if I have too can manage 1 car) = £500
Phones/gym (gym not nes.) = £80
Food = £280
Misc. (clothes, shamp, baby stuff etc.) = £100
Savings = £50
Child support for 1 child in previous rel. (4 more years) = £400
Sending money home (parents/sister in partners home country in Africa - not negotiable) = about £200 sometimes more/less
Social / going out = £280

I grew up pretty poor and while I’m okay with not being rich I hate the thought of barely scrapping by each month and not being able to afford even going out for dinner. The biggest problem is my partners culture ! He came as a migrant and has to help his parents + sisters/brothers who live in a poor village in Africa and also visits them for 1 - 2 months a year. Makes things very hard financially.

But I love him obviously and don’t expect him to leave his family to possibly die as they’d have no income but is having a child going to be too difficult? Everyone poor and rich seem to manage I just wonder how !

What’d you guys think 🤔?

Have you looked at what benefits you would be entitled to?

I have but I’m a bit worried to rely on them as you never know with the government!

I’d probably get working tax credits / child benefit maybe child tax credits

Why would you be entitled to benifits if you can afford to send £200 to Africa!

I think it can work OP. I didn't find the newborn stage very expensive. It's when you have to start organising childcare, so if there's a way you can avoid it then you should be okay. Maybe get rid of 1 car if you can manage with only 1.

Can you start saving money for being on mat leave and baby stuff?
Also have you saved money for buying your flat already?

Stroller15

Thank you I think it doesn’t sound so bad but of course I don’t really know how much kids cost!

Sonlypuppyfat - oh stop it, he supports his family would you rather he leave his parents to die ? You might do that to your parents but some people love their family.

I agree childcare is expensive but children especially v small ones don't really need that much stuff and nearly everything necessary can be bought second hand.

Ladybird - I’m planning on saving £1000 before getting pregnant for baby stuff, and either decorating our flat or putting money towards a deposit if needed but I don’t think you need one with a council flat which will cost us about £20k total. In the meantime I’m looking for a slightly better job if possible

Pebbles pony - that’s what I heard, I just want to enjoy the experience and reduce my stress as much as possible and I’m a planner !

How long do you want to be off work? You might want to look at future childcare costs wheb planbing. Personally I wouldn't be comfortable with £500 of car costs when my rent is only 300 per month and if I was trying to be financially prudent. But perhaps due to jobs / commutes they are a necessity.
If you have plans to buy in the future you might also want to look at some online mortgage calculators that calculate your affordability as again the 400 child support, 500 cars and 200 a month supporting your DPs family may impact this. Your DP has £600 overheads on quite a low income so you are supporting this before you even start paying for your own family outgoings.

There’s a child already. No travel costs? Is the child very nearby?

Snickleden - I know it’s so many dependants! I’ve just passed my driving this month and have never had a car and think it will help a lot with jobs but yeah I agree if needed we could possibly share a car.

I plan on working 2 - 3 days per week then probably going back to full time when school starts.

One episode- yeah the child is a 10 min drive away but like I said my partner pays £400 per month + drives him to school when he can as his mother doesn’t have a car/never worked

Op right to buy ended in Scotland in 2016

I think a lot depends on what your plans for childcare are (and if you'd get help with the cost of this).

Who decided on the £400 child support? That is way way higher than the standard for someone who only earns £17k. But then again if lowering it would negatively impact on the child then it's not something to consider.

If DPs ex has never worked then presumably if his current child goes on to uni then you and DP may be financially supporting the child for longer than the 4 years left of formal child support left to pay - another factor to consider in your planning perhaps.
Also is your DP still planning to use all his annual leave for a month home to visit his family when you have a baby? That's a very big financial and time expense.
Also remember that you'll probably have to plan for childcare costs when your DC has started school.

Obviously people do have kids on low incomes (Ive been there myself) but your DP has a huge chunk of outgoings that are going to make a tight budget even tighter. It's only for you and your DP to know if it's a compromise youre willing to make.

400 a month is that calculated by csa as seems a lot! And a child is as expensive as you want, I ended up with a toddler and only getting 8k a year, it wasn’t great but doable

If you live in the city do you honestly need any cars at all? Wouldn’t it be cheaper to get bus or train tickets than run cars?
I personally wouldn’t be impressed with the money being sent to Africa but if your happy with the arrangement then so be it,
If you have family who can provide free/cheap childcare then you should be ok,

Have you looked at what benefits you would be entitled to?

^Or how about not relying on the government to bring up your child. £280 on social/ going out seems a bit excessive

youknow - I know it’s too much but he doesn’t want to rock the boat and to be fair it’s for his child so that’s what it is

Snicledon - I know it’s pretty frustrating my partner having so many dependants but what can I/he do unfortunately that’s how it is.

When his son gets to 16 or 18 then he can get a part time job / child supports stops my parents earned a good wage and I got £3,000 a year while at university while no help from parents and as long as the current system keeps his son will get loads from student finance so no need to support him

Greenyagirl - I know ! I think he just offered / she asked for that much and she still wants him to pay for presents / even teachers presents and he she didn’t get housing benefit she’d want him to pay her rent. We understand it’s not ideal but she won’t let him see his child otherwise and obviously doesn’t want to go down the court route. It’s only 4 more years left of paying anyway and this was all before we met so

There’s a lot you can cut back on there. £280 on going out is a lot as is £280 on food for 2. Controversial, but £400 is an awful lot of child maintenance on such a low salary. And £500 for cars is definitely too much.

Not the point of the post but what makes you think you can buy the council house at a discount?