Based on our salary can we afford a child ?

[Fitness247]

I live in Scotland with my partner of 6 years in a 1 bed council flat in the city centre, I’m nearly 30, partners 35 and we’re thinking of having a child but I’m worried about finances.

I work in the healthcare/care sector getting £16k partner is on £17k so pretty low salaries but our city/lifestyle is very cheap. When we have a child I would work p/t as obviously childcare would cost more then my salary so not worth it. We are able to buy our flat then in 5 years we can sell it and buy a 2-3 bed flat/house in cash due to council discount. My family are able to help for childcare if I work part time.

I can try to increase my salary but that’s not guaranteed in my sector as it’s badly paid even at manager level but obviously will try to get better pay in the future.

I’ve done the sums and this is the result: salary per month = £2,300 (roughly)

Rent/or mortgage = £300
Water/gas etc = £250
Cars x 2 (if I have too can manage 1 car) = £500
Phones/gym (gym not nes.) = £80
Food = £280
Misc. (clothes, shamp, baby stuff etc.) = £100
Savings = £50
Child support for 1 child in previous rel. (4 more years) = £400
Sending money home (parents/sister in partners home country in Africa - not negotiable) = about £200 sometimes more/less
Social / going out = £280

I grew up pretty poor and while I’m okay with not being rich I hate the thought of barely scrapping by each month and not being able to afford even going out for dinner. The biggest problem is my partners culture ! He came as a migrant and has to help his parents + sisters/brothers who live in a poor village in Africa and also visits them for 1 - 2 months a year. Makes things very hard financially.

But I love him obviously and don’t expect him to leave his family to possibly die as they’d have no income but is having a child going to be too difficult? Everyone poor and rich seem to manage I just wonder how !

What’d you guys think 🤔?

I live in England now l like I’ve said I used to live in Scotland and put it by mistake sorry for all the confusion everyone !

We have less income at the moment due to me developing a degenerative condition in pregnancy and both our work hours needing to reduce a lot because of it.
We manage. We are happy.
Like others have said there is a lot you can cut back on. We ditched gym & other subscriptions, have 1 car, utilise the free groups at children's centres and libraries. We don't spend much money on "social" but still socialise - had a picnic today in the park with 5 other families from our antenatal class (babies are 1 now) and it cost us about a fiver.

Wilding - we definitely need to look into the buying our flat further from what I read on gov website it said they take the discount instead of a deposit and to be honest we may be able to borrow the £20k from family but it’s a maybe

I’m sometimes so tired I forget my own name, but I have never forgotten where I live ....

That aside, why on Earth are you spending £500 pcm on cars now let alone planning to spend that on cars when you have a child?

Don’t be - why ? Because I made a mistake of saying I live In Scotland when i moved to England ? Strange story to make up no ? But okay

Danigrace - thanks for your reply ! That sounds lovely Im pretty thrifty and picnics sound so nice

This would be the same family who five minutes ago havent given you so much as a fiver since you were 16. But now youre ok to borrow £20k if you need to to buy a flat in a country you forget you live in

Never twerk - well I moved from Scotland so it didn’t come from no where anyway maybe my memory’s not so good at this time !

I know it’s a lot my boyfriend has a car on finance so can’t get rid of it, it costs about £120 per month and I’ve never had a car but plan to get a cheap, the £500 is for instance, maintenance, breakdown petrol etc maybe it’s less idk yet

Some people seem to be very harsh on you. I think the bottom line is you can do it. It would no doubt require some financial sacrifices to be made - maybe you could give up gym membership. Being a mum is a pretty physical job so you can get free exercise that way, plus you would have 9 months (or longer depending on how easy or hard it is to conceive) to get things sorted.

My advice is to try not to stress about money and to go for it. They say in life you regret the things you don't do more than the things you do :)

Snicledon - my brother is very rich (like lived in a million pound house in London) and has offered but I don’t like asking for money from family and have never got anything from my parents and wouldn’t even ask. But I doubt I’d have to as I said I’m sure you don’t need a deposit for a right to buy. Lol geez I guess big mistake saying Scotland instead of England huh. I MOVED to England I made a very little mistake in my op so sorry for the confusion lol.

Don't worry op you can make it work if you plan and budget, being thrifty can actually be quite fun! Have a look at what free baby groups and days out are available near you and make a list - that gave me more confidence. Babies don't need lots of extra cash, as long as you can cover the basics and have a lot of love to offer you'll be fine

Kay - thank you ! Internet forums tend to be very harsh but I asked for it so !

I came back expecting this to have been deleted and it's still going

Danigrace - thank you, I’ve looked at lots of baby groups and I’d love to go to those and they look cheap and I hope I can make new Mum friends and enjoy it :)

Ham - that’s stupid why would it be deleted jeez it’s not like I said I lived in Australia I’ve explained so much if you don’t believe I made the op mistake of England/ Scotland then okay, thanks and bye !

I think some lenders will take the discount as deposit but many will require some deposit from you. I'd work on making sure you can buy your place before they remove right to buy in England as well!

I think you should look at whether you are mature enough to have a child tbh

You know - I will definitely check thanks !

Charity - you don’t even know me I’ve said nothing immature in fact I’m planning everything I can before making big decisions. So thank you and bye.

The OP is immature because they said they lived somewhere they don't...? Or am I missing something?

Sorry OP but you don’t seem to have a clue about anything

You don’t seem to know exactly where you live
You don’t have any idea on the costs or process involved in purchasing a property - or if your even likely to get a mortgage

Go and sort yourself out
Go to the bank regarding mortgage
Speak to council regarding purchasing the flat

Find out all the information- then plan out what you want to do.

But it doesn’t sound like your in any position to start trying for a baby....

Also not sure why you keep throwing in comments about having a millionaire in the family - it’s not relevant at all to your situation.

I think buying a council flat for 50% of its market value with the sole intention of selling it on for profit is reprehensible

Particularly as you are hardly on the breadline

You know - I know I’m trying to figure out what I’ve said that’s so immature apparently getting Scotland and England mixed up is a cardinal sin around here

I never said you shouldn't send money to Africa, I said why should you get benifits if you can afford to send money away. It all reads like rubbish anyway