Help.......... Ex related CSA and extra payments......

[Reginaphalangey]

Can anyone offer me some advice please........

I have no biological kids of my own (yet) but My wonderful partner of 6months has a 4yr old child from a previous marriage,

His ex left him, and since the split he has had 50% custody of the child and has faithfully paid monthly amounts over half extra to the amount required of him by law through the CSA......

His ex however is challenging him that he does not contribute enough...... And over and above him paying extra to her per month, she now expects him to pay half of all extra curricular activities!!!

To me this seems unreasonable, and that she will continue to want more and more from him.....
But my querie is, what do the child support payments cover, and can anyone else offer their opinion on my dilemma??

Should he drop back to paying only the required monthly amount??? And should she be demanding any extra above the figure given by the CSA???

Thanks for reading

We do 50-50 shared-care. We worked out the costs, divide it in two and pay it.

We split the child-benefit 50-50.

Not everyone can do it, but it keeps it amicable.

Nicky - you seem to be of the opinion that women should just have the babies and then STFU.

I hope you don't have daughters.

people like Nicky really exist outside of Eastenders/Jeremy Kyle then???

they do toothbrush. i've had the misfortune of meeting people with these attitudes. it's sad. there is so much to be said for education. and i dont mean spelling and grammer. i mean people educating themselves in what goes on beyond the woman in no 46 who shacked up with the husband of her in no 27. there are so many different reasons why a person would be using CSA, the fact that you happen to associate only with the type of person you describe nicky does not mean that this is the case for all users of the service. open your mind, move outside your comfort zone, meet people who you dont normally associate with and find out a bit about the world outside of your close circle. it might help you relate to others with a bit less venom and a bit more understanding.

Op, your oh sounds like a really decent parent wanting to pay for the upkeep of his dc, if she needs more money for activities then possibly your oh can ask if they can sort out what they are going to do now and in the future for extra activites as they do get really expensive.

if your oh doesn't want to pay then that is his choice - but if he was still living with the mum he perhaps needs to think would he still say no? Could he pay a third perhaps to contribute something and ask if a grandparent could help out?

nicky what makes you think i don't work? Because i have no TV to watch Jeremy Kyle on?

On the contrary, I own my own business, just like you - I set up after being made redundant from my FT job I'd been in for 12 years (although I did take 4 months out when DD was born). Unlike you, i don't have an accountant to minimise by liabilities though, maybe that's where I'm going wrong .

Your business must be doing well if you can take time out to watch daytime TV; that's why I got rid of mine - no time to spend watching it, my precious free time gets spent with family

well. 1 i live in exactly the same size world as you? 2 i clearly do exist...? 3 well done on your business and yep doing brill excelnt trn over thus far thanks! 4 the circle of ppl i mix in are non of ur bees wax 5 i have girls and will teach them to stand on their own two feet and not to be spongers dependant on benefits unlike some! and 6 IF YOU ALLL READ THE COMMENTS I HAVE NEVER ONCE SAID ALL MOTHERS!!!! FFS READ THEM PROPERLY!!!!

are you from NI nicky?

no not from NI but regard of the location i live the WORLD is still the same size....

i was just asking as they way you post comes across familiar. (i'm in NI) just thought it was a 'dialect' that i was recognising. scotland?

the earth is the same size for everyone. your world is as big or as small as you want it to be. yours seems small based on what you have posted.

Nicky your pretty bonkers.

That's all really.

I hope your business has nothing to do with teaching anyone to write Nicky.

He would have to pay 20% of his income minus a percentage according to how many over nights he has the child. I would get something in writing as to how much he would have to pay if going through the CSA, maybe there is an online calculator and then show that to the ex and go from there.

Mind you I get a measly amount from my XH and more would be handy but if she is asking for a lot more than she would be entitled to it would give him some wiggle room when negotiating.

Keep in mind though that he is financially responsible for the child and has to pay a fair amount.

hmph, well where i was taught in an acutal real school (not a gold diggers or rince a man for life college) we lrnt that earth (that stuff found on the ground) is one of the substances which form the world (the big thing we ALL live on).... maybe my teacher got it wrong.

They could have done some spelling. I did rinsing men and spelling.

I did slaggy gold digging and spreading my legs.

And now I'm rich! RICH off the CSA money I get for my children.

Oh. Wait.

do you really actually not get what i'm saying? genuine question. i will explain if you want me too.

madame have CSA rates gone up recently? i thought it was 15% for 1 child and 20% for two or more children?

yeah good one vagaceratops. you clearly must have a degree in witt had me lmfo. and what is your line of work? presuming you actually provide for you own children?

I have a degree in rincing, and mincing too.

Thats how I provide for my children.

I rince mince.

Who provides for their own children? Mugs!!!

nicky do you work with the general public in your line of work?