Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 2. ALL welcome!

[AMS19]

Hi ladies

This thread is open for EVERYONE. To discuss the highs, lows, emotions, and experiences of us all going through our miscarriage journey. Together we will get through this!

Previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/4119053-Support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-MC-MMC?pg=1

To my incredible strong warriors...I cannot believe we filled a thread! We've got this ladies ❤
@DMT1982
@Scottishskifun
@glowingtwig
@mia2201
@Redfoxinthesnow
@Seasalt1984
@laurat94
@tamsin424
@cocoloco88
@SuzieDeLaTour
@Cordial11
@seasalt1984
@thehotelcalifornia
@TheDaydreamBelievers
@Pettylamby
@Lililou
@Enola41
@CocoLoco88
@Nicolamac1
@Sleeeeeepy
@Mellous
@Nicolamac1
@Semla
@Seasidestarfruit
@mummydoingamasters
@elm7
@MrsD1992
@CookieMonster3001
@Dryshampoo32

Sincere apologies for missing anyone xx

Morning all!

I'm sorry I've been MIA, I've just been all consumed by my desperation to ovulate so I'm in with a chance!

To recap for anyone newer, I had my MVA on the 14th January. So just over three weeks ago! I'm getting vvvfl on FRER and Wondfo cheapies - just a side note here, the Wondfo cheapies are just as sensitive as the FRERs?! And a million times cheaper haha!! They're advertised as 20mIU but I swear they must be at least 10 if not closer to the FRER level of 6... Lines are tracking the same on both.

So I'm CD 23 today and my temp has finally dropped quite a bit! So think I may ovulate tomorrow possibly? I think it tends to follow that trend. Have been DTD every other day so 🤞🏻

Sorry I've not properly read through all the new joiners but I'm so glad you've found this support group as everyone's so friendly and just all round lovely! And I definitely recommend these tests if you want to obsessively pee on sticks every other day to track your line regression like I did... ❤️

Wondfo Pregnancy Test Strips Early Detection 20xOne Step Pregnancy Tests for Home Self-Checking https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B081N9B9VQ/ref=cmswwrcppapifabccK9W9VR0N5RX5NPX41HNH?encoding=UTF8&psc=1

Did anyone's first period start with really sore cramps for over 24hrs before the actual flow!?

I've been having cramps since yesterday and expected my period to start overnight (it always starts when I'm sleeping) and I've woken up to nothing but the cramps again!

It's that feeling I had just after my MVA where my uterus just felt bruised especially when my bladder was full?

I only usually get very mild period cramps so this is a new thing for me!

Hi ladies. I still haven't been brave enough to test despite being a month tomorrow.

Also received the letter from the crematorium that the ashes are ready to collect. I think due to the number of weeks I was and the baby ashes scandal in Scotland they now provide them.
It has thrown me a bit need to decide where to scatter them. It's a bit of a tough day tbh.

@LauraT94 that's great it sounds like you're about to ovulate and things moving in the right direction for you! Good tip re cheaper tests as well!

@Pettylamby I didn't experience cramps but that sounds really normal from things I've read about first period after MC if you're AF is approaching? I was expecting bad cramps but had nothing really! Although my AF has picked up a bit after slow start and feels more like what I'm used to with AF.

@scottishskifun oh wow that must have been hard news to receive and process. Sounds like a really tough day for you. With tests just take your time and do it when you feel ready, try not to put pressure on yourself. Sending love and hugs your way x

Hi all
I've just had a my final scan after ten days to check all had come away. They did a preg test first and it was still showing g as pregnant. The scan has said otherwise. I was really hoping a miracle had happened. I'm like done emotionally now, I've had enough and no more, I can't take no more.

@Sherryxxxx I'm so sorry, be kind to yourself have a warm bath, get into some comfy pj's, have a cry or put something mindless on Netflix. Are you off work at the moment? If not maybe consider it and speak to your GP.
It's horrible, rubbish and unfair, it does improve slowly but take it day by day and be kind to yourself. I have found all the ladies here are a great space for support as you don't have to explain the feelings or why it's a certain way we all get it and I find that a great comfort of automatic understanding.

@Scottishskifun thank you for your lovely message. I actually lost my job in December due to covid but I hated the work place it had a toxic environment so it was a blessing really, I now have my own little company I run from home which is covering the bills and keeping us all happy. Do you know, I was sat in the waiting room and a woman was sat there clearly pregnant but she was acting off her head, stumbling all over the place, mouthing off and looked a junkie. I thought how do you deserve that baby and I don't 😔 it's awful to feel like that against someone I don't even know but it really added to the upset x

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I couldn't even begin to imagine 😔

@Sherryxxxx I think everyone on here has thought why me along the way it's perfectly normal feeling. I also struggle with friends announcements like many here not because I'm not happy but it's a reminder of what I've lost. You are grieving it's perfectly normal reaction please don't feel bad about having that thought.
Make sure you give yourself time and also amazingly well done on getting a business going!

@Scottishskifun oh gosh that must be so hard for you and a really difficult decision to make. Take your time - there’s no need to do anything straight away. Sending virtual hugs xx @
@Sherryxxxx oh I think it’s natural to feel that way, it doesn’t make you a bad person at all. I’ve had moments where I’ve thought “why them and not me?” and I think if you see someone acting so irresponsibly it’s bound to go through your head!! X

@Sherryxxxx we all totally understand how you feel. I'm feeling really p*seed off today I'm not pregnant and this happened. Nothing triggered me, I just am angry about it. Why me?! Why couldn't I just have a healthy happy baby like "everyone" else." It's so normal to feel what you feel. We all have good days and bad days. It's painful, hard and crap, but we will all get there xx

@Scottishskifun sorry I missed your message. Why not keep a little bit and have it made into jewellery? You could have have little necklace made and the baby would always be close to you then?

@ams19 yes lots to consider. I had thought about jewellery part of me is terrified of loosing it or my son breaking it.
It's a conversation I need to have with DH as well. Today and Tuesday when we go pick them up when DS is at nursery is too painful for that one though.

So got a negative pregnancy test 2 weeks to the day,strange dont know how to feel about it because it seems like a long time since it happened,I'm happy and sad as I remember how excited I was when I got a positive. Hope everyone is doing well xx

@Neady1980 a negative is definitely bittersweet. It's great to get the reassurance of no leftover tissue likely but also hard to accept not being pregnant anymore. It hopefully won't be long until you see those 2 lined again ❤

@Pettylamby I keep having cramps as it I’ve got a UTI and wee’ing lots. I’m nearly 6 weeks post D&C and assume I should be coming on soon. Have had a urine sample sent off just in case a UTI as these cramps keep me awake more and more now. It’s only really noticeable at night though. Weird! Xx

@DMT1982 fingers crossed its not a UTI 🤞 when do you hear back on your private health care?

Thanks @Seasalt1984 and @DMT1982.

Still nothing happening over here - cramps were just as bad yesterday but woke up to no period again today! If I did ovulate I'd be 13dpo now! I don't think it's a UTI as I checked the symptoms and I don't have any really! 🤷🏼‍♀️

So frustrating! I feel like my timeline in my head has been totally thrown off - worrying I'll go back to post pill me that took 95 days for a period to appear! Really can't deal with that again!

My rational brain tells me to give it another week but that does not help my anxious brain!

I just want CD1 to be here so I can FINALLY close this chapter and move on to TTC again!

Hope everyone else is okay!

Hi ladies, like most of you I’m feeling very frustrated, stuck in the limbo of stopped bleeding but still positive pregnancy tests! I’ve been wanting to get back into some exercise but didn’t know where to start. Came across a lady called Bettina who does fertility yoga on YouTube. She has had miscarriages and does yoga sessions and advice specifically about recovering from a mc. Also lots of yoga for ttc and pregnancy. If anyone is interested here is the link
m.youtube.com/c/BettinaRae?disable_polymer=true&itct=CAcQxyAiEwiL76ytn9XuAhWR5uYKHRXhCBE%3D
I’ve started doing these as something else to focus on Xx

@Tealchoc that's super helpful thanks so much for sharing!! My FRER never made it to negative, my other 3 have, so I'm going back to EPU for bloods. Like you I'm finding I frustrating not being able to completely draw a line under it. I've started tracking as a new cycle as my "period" has now stopped, but would have liked to have got a stark white FRER ideally! Xx

@AMS19 I hope you find the yoga useful too! Sorry you are still getting a positive too, it’s good your epu is on the ball, fingers crossed when they do your bloods it will reassure you x

@Tealchoc I'm hoping it's just a dodgy test. Wishful hoping I'm sure but seems too dark to me given all other tests are now negative. Would imply my hcg is 5-10 and the line seems to dark for that. But decided to step away from the tests and focus on OPKs and wait for the bloods instead xx

Hi all

I got a letter today saying the biopsy of my “pregnancy tissue” was normal. Obviously I’m relieved but also confused. If it’s normal then why did this happen??

@Mellous was it a full biopsy or just to check for molar? Do you have someone you can follow up with?

@Pettylamby I know exactly what you mean when you just want your period to come so you can close one chapter and start another. I would be 6 weeks post procedure on Wednesday and like I said think I have a UTI due to cramping and pains. Well I came on this afternoon and actually cried. I cried with relief that everything that had been all consuming since early December and was finally over, I cried with sadness that I wasn’t pregnant anymore and I just cried because I hadn’t given up hope of it all being ok.

Hang in there those cramps maybe your body sorting itself out as mine have been going on for weeks now and finally a period xxxx