Hi everyone.
I’m 28 and was 10 weeks pregnant. When myself and my boyfriend found out we were pregnant - we were absolutely over the moon and couldn’t wait.
I had light brown spotting on Saturday night which became heavier on Sunday, so I called NHS 24 who told me to go to Out Of Hours GP at my local hospital. Waited 3.5 hours to be told “we don’t have access to the equipment so I can’t help you but don’t worry - bleeding is normal”
Went to work on Monday and was bleeding red blood. Got sent home and was told by the midwife to go for an emergency scan at the early pregnancy unit.
Went to the early pregnancy unit on Tuesday morning. At first she did an ultrasound on me. I knew instantly on the midwife and student midwife faces that something was wrong and I could see her turning the screen so I wouldn’t be able to see.
She told me she could not see anything but a sac so did a vaginal ultrasound instead in which she found a sac, a yolk but no embryo attached or heartbeat. She also told me that it was only measuring 6 weeks. Although she never told me it was going to be a miscarriage - I instantly knew. She printed off the scan for me and told me to come back next week for another scan.
I got home, and the bleeding and cramp became intense. I was in so much pain, and then just felt “it”. I ran to the toilet - and there it was on the pad I was wearing. I screamed, I cried, I instantly felt completely broken.
I am still devastated 2 days on. I feel like I can’t get out of it. My mind is going into overdrive - constantly googling why and how and whether it will happen to me again.
My parents have been the best support. My mum has took time off work to be by my side constantly which I am grateful for but I just can’t get over it and feel like I will never get over it.
Any help with the grieving would help me a lot. Thank you.