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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

Recurrent Miscarriage Support - tests, treatment, trying again - thread 10

988 replies

bakingtins · 02/06/2014 08:07

Welcome everyone - pull up a chair! A thread for anyone who has suffered multiple miscarriages and is in need of information, moral support, tea or sympathy. Newbies very welcome.

Can we start the thread with a recap of where we are all up to again, please?

OP posts:
Catlover2014 · 02/07/2014 22:21

triple I've had some basic mc tests that have come back clear (autoimmune, blood clotting, thyroid etc). We are waiting for chromosome tests but that's unlikely to be cause as there's no family history so not going to wait on those before ttc. If we mc again then they will do content analysis, at the moment I suspect that's what will happen.

Consultant has suggested aspirin from BFP (if I ever get one again) that's top of the progesterone, Letrozole and 5mg folic acid I've already been taking for my fertility issues (also unexplained).

Sorry to read that you're concerned about your job security at the moment. Not what you need right now! When will you know more? Life just keeps biting sometimes doesn't it?!

XxX

Catlover2014 · 02/07/2014 23:09

Homelander glad to hear you're feeling a bit better. You've had such a difficult time and I can't imagine how hard it's been.

I have everything crossed that you will conceive soon and all will go well. It's such a difficult balancing act between giving yourself time but also not leaving it too long. If it helps a girl I work with has just had her #2 and is 43!

Hope you can get answers and help from RMC soon.

Hugs xx

JBrd · 03/07/2014 13:43

Sorry to hear that some of you are struggling with bad days at the moment Thanks

It's very common and very normal when you have suffered from recurring mcs - those days were suddenly it all comes crashing down on you! For me, and it's usually a really minor thing that sets me off. Doesn't help if everyone around you is popping out babies left right and center. I have a 'friend' who has just started mat leave, and all her Fb comments are about how rough she is feeling, how she can't move, how much pain she is in, how bored she is etc. She knows about my mcs and has had two herself, and I sometimes feel like leaving a really shouty comment Angry

home I'm also thinking about starting ttc again, but the thought fills me with dread Sad I just don't know if I could cope with it all again...

So, I went for my first class of Pre-conception and Fertility Yoga yesterday. I had done one class of antenatal yoga, and when I told the teacher I wouldn't be coming anymore because of my mc, she suggested I might want to think about joining this other yoga class that she runs (once I feel up for it). I thought I might as well try it (given that I had already paid for a course and she was happy for me to transfer). Hoping that it might help to re-connect and, more than anything, relax.
It was a lovely class, and will probably be relaxing at some point - once I can stop crying for pretty much half the duration!
They did a little introduction round at the start (completely informal, and you could say as little or as much as you liked), and I got as far as saying my name and that I've recently had my 4th mc, and then I just could stop the tears anymore! Blush No one bat an eyelid, thankfully, I guess they are used to this - but still! Then again, everyone there is in a very similar situation to me, there was lots of sympathy (which made my crying even worse).
I thought I'd be OK, but there is clearly a lot of stuff going on that I have been pushing away, instead of dealing with it. It's one way of coping...

I will probably now dig out that leaflet for counselling that I was given... Might as well. Has anyone had counselling after their mc? How does counselling work? I've never had any, I have no idea.

TinyTear · 03/07/2014 13:49

JBrd I had counselling after mc4

I emailed them and i couldn't trust myself to talk on the phone and had 5 sessions (i could have had more but by the 5th I was feeling better and had actually (unknown to me) got pregnant again (which what would be MC5))

The counsellor was ok and helped a lot, dug up a lot of issues, but by the end as she was - after all- a miscarriage counsellor, I wanted to talk about other things and didn't want it all brought back to the mc and that is why I stopped... but i felt much better in myself, more accepting in a way and it helped me realise i don't need to be strong all the time...

only issue was the sessions were on the same floor as the EPU, which is the same floor as the labour and ante-natal and post-natal wards... ahhhrgh! so pregnant women and new babies on the lift...

TinyTear · 03/07/2014 13:50

also, mine was around november / december so becasue of work trips and christmas and so on i had at times 2 or 3 weeks between sessions. it was actually good in a way to help me process things for longer...

barkingtreefrog · 03/07/2014 13:50

JBrd my clinic does counselling, not just for mc but failed iui/ivf cycles or dealing with them in the first place. I went for a session and having just started reading a book called 'The Mind Body Fertility Connection', recommended to me by another mner, I think I'm going to book another one. My counsellor just let me talk, asking some questions but mainly just listening. Given space to just splurge it suprised me what I was most upset about. I found it very cathartic. If it's been offered to you I'd grab it - can't do any harm and could help a lot.

Catlover2014 · 03/07/2014 14:21

JBrd sorry to hear how upset you've been :(

I think it's great you've started that yoga class hopefully you and the other there can support one another.

There's no counselling available on the nhs where I live but I have just started to see someone privately and I think it's going to help me.

Re facebook, have you considered deactivating your account for a while? I deactivated mine two years ago and have never looked back. It's a total relief to not have to keep seeing other people bragging or moaning about their blessings! X

tannyLoo · 04/07/2014 05:58

Not really slept and feeling sick with anxiety. Just want a normal scan, not a bad news scan.

It's not until 2, so God knows what a wreck I'll be then.

JBrd I think counselling is a really good idea. I had amazing counselling years ago following a termination. It saved me and some of my relationships from all the pent up anger and grief I had.

Justonemoretime · 04/07/2014 06:15

Good luck today, Tanny. Xx

TinyTear · 04/07/2014 06:47

Thinking of you Tanny
Good luck!

Catlover2014 · 04/07/2014 06:59

Good luck tanny! Hugs xx

Triplespin · 04/07/2014 08:37

Good luck Tanny. Keeping everything crossed for you.

JBrd · 04/07/2014 08:48

Good luck tanny I hope that you'll get some reassurance! xxx

Original poster
bakingtins · 04/07/2014 15:30

tanny late to the thread today but hope you had good news at the scan and are feeling a bit more sorted with a treatment plan.

OP posts:
longestlurkerever · 04/07/2014 18:30

Good luck Tanny. Thinking of you

tannyLoo · 04/07/2014 20:48

Thank you all, it's been a really tiring day, but we have a blob and a plan! The blob is a tiny one, but I'm 4+3 today, so he said it was the right size and in the right place. My first positive scan since we started this journey, and I can't tell you how that felt...

Prof B has put me on prednisolone, 20mg, from tomorrow morning, and I start my heparin too, and continue with the progesterone.

The biopsy results aren't due back until the middle of next week, but goods news for you Tiny that they're working to clear the backlog.

We'll have a phone consultation next week, and he'll see me again in a fortnight for another scan and plan the next stages, if all is well.

Of course I'm already niggly doubty, but mostly I'm just pleased to have a plan.

Thank goodness for proactive, innovative and gung-ho consultants Smile

Catlover2014 · 04/07/2014 21:39

Great news tanny!! Hope you and the little bab get plenty rest tonight after that long day. X

Catlover2014 · 04/07/2014 22:21

Old article but it's a bit of reassurance maybe:

www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-13942992

X

TinyTear · 05/07/2014 07:23

That is great news Tanny. I have to test on Tuesday. Shall keep you posted.

tannyLoo · 05/07/2014 14:31

Tiny squeal! Am full of admiration for your self control... How are you feeling?

tannyLoo · 05/07/2014 14:32

And thanks Cat, it's good to remind yourself than it can happen!

Triplespin · 05/07/2014 15:51

Yes agree - tiny so much self control!! AF is due on Saturday for me and I have already tested twice!! Bfn of course but likely I am out this cycle too. It's annoying as I now have a diagnosis but finding trouble getting pg in the first place. Too many hurdles.

Tanny - hope you are enjoying an anxiety free weekend.

TinyTear · 05/07/2014 18:05

I only test once or twice per cycle!
I feel grumpy and hormonal so no idea if it's pregnancy or PMS...

Catlover2014 · 05/07/2014 19:16

Fingers crossed for you tiny.

Ladies, I've treated myself to an amazing dress for my friend's wedding in a few weeks. Wish it was big fat maternity dress though haha! X

twilightstruggle · 06/07/2014 19:11

Hey there,

I was wondering if there was room here for another? My history is four previous MCs (7, 10, 6 and 6 weeks), no DC as yet, early 30s, and first appointment at St Mary's at the end of the month. Feeling reasonably positive today because of having received the appointment but before that I was in a very dark place. It's all very rubbish.

Very sad to see so many others in similar positions and especially feel for those of you having a particularly difficult time at the moment. Fab news though Tanny, fingers crossed for one of these happy, healthy pregnancies I've heard about!

Has anyone here experience of St Mary's and was it positive. Not sure what to expect at the first appointment so
if anyone has any experience that'd be grand.