19-year-old came out as non-binary

[MitchmumR]

Hello - please excuse the double post, I didn't see there was a specific page for LGBTQ+ children. I've only just made an account, and am not the most tech-literate woman out there!

Anyway, my 19-year-old came out to me as non-binary a few days ago. I love them so much, and am delighted that they felt comfortable enough to tell me - obviously I want to support them as much as possible, I was just wondering if any other parents whose children have come out to them (or trans/non-binary people themselves!) had any good resources I can use to make sure I'm as supportive as possible. Thanks 🤗

People don’t use pronouns about themselves and are never present when someone is using pronouns instead of their name. Think about it, do you use ‘they/them’ when talking to your child?
“Hey Sam, what would you like for lunch?”
”hey they, what would you like for lunch?”

Can you see how ridiculous it sounds?

You sound lovely and supportive - ignore the nasty anti trans people on here.

😂

Do you realise how old fashioned the notion of gender actually is? It’s the belief that males and females have to fit into certain boxes - girls have long hair, like pink, flowers, dresses and want to be nurses or teachers. Boys have short hair, like blue, mud, track suits and want to be astronauts or engineers. It’s purely about stereotypes. it’s a performance. One where boys and girls who don’t fit the stereotypical boys/girls list is made to feel odd and must therefore be ‘non-binary’.
There are many of us who don’t subscribe to a notion of ‘gender’ at all because we can see it for what it is - harmful and reductive. We use pronouns to indicate sex - nothing at all to do with ‘gender’. We know that a ‘she’ can be what used to be called a ‘tomboy’. I was always a tomboy as a child and probably still am. But I was always female, didn’t need to pretend that I was neither male or female, didn’t need to force others to pretend I was neither male or female.
Those who have fallen for this harmful ideology expect others to also believe it too - that’s as narcissistic as it gets!

Not just narcissistic, but also cringeworthy IMO. That’s my overriding feeling when people spout this regressive stuff. I feel embarrassed on their behalf. Who on Earth measures themselves against a daft, old-fashioned scale of socially constructed stereotypes nowadays? It’s like measuring how far the hem of your skirt is above your knees to see whether you’re A Good Woman or A Bad Woman. It’s cringeworthy and laughable.

The idea that intelligent people sit there earnestly pondering over exactly where they are on a ‘gender spectrum’ constructed by sexist, conservative farts centuries ago is just utterly astounding.