Intestate question

[WingingItSince1973]

My dad died on Sunday. We didn't have a close relationship. I did try and keep up one with him but he was a stubborn man and I don't think really like me as we are very different people. My mum was a victim of dv and left him when I was a toddler (am 50 now). I had close relationship with aunties and grandparents on his side of family so saw him sporadically during my teens but nothing much during my adulthood. Anyway I was called to the hospital by my aunty and was with him when he died. He wasn't awake and I'm not sure if he knew I was there. So here's the thing. Aunty messaged me to ask if his name is on my birth certificate. It is and I sent her a screenshot. Now he didn't have a will and I'm and have been for the last 10 years his next of kin. No more children. He outlived his partner and they weren't married. There seems to be no legal papers anywhere to suggest anyone is next of kin. I'm being told now that a verbal agreement was my aunty and another uncle to have any money left over and treat myself and 3 others whatever that means. My aunty had a very close relationship with him along with my remaining two uncles. My question is would I be contacted regarding his 'estate'? He didn't own property and I have no idea of his finances. They are emptying his council house this week and have turned down my offers of help. There's also a chance now of compensation as he died with a condition bought about by his working environment and we are waiting for post mortem. My aunty wants to take over everything. Morally and legally what should I do? I'm not one for confrontation and it would be easier to give my aunty legal powers but then part of me thinks my dad owes me for never ever providing anything for me. I hate this though as I'm not at all materialistic but if there's a good amount of money it would really help my situation as I don't work due to illness and my poor dh shoulders the burden of earning a living and we live week to week. Sorry it's long. Hope someone can help advise what I should do xx

Well obviously I had to provide my identification & I had signed the death certificates in both cases

@WingingItSince1973 I've been following this thread with interest! How is it all going? 🤞🤞

Hi. Well my cousin has been absolutely vile and sending me awful messages telling me what a failure of a daughter I was and that my dad had reasons for not seeing me and I'm a low life! Anyway I'm sat on school run and just had the coroner leave a message as the post mortem has been done and I need to call him. Can't do that for another half hour. My aunty has insisted she's clearing the house and will leave it clean and empty. I guess she's holding out for some money. Anyway my dgs is out. I'll update when I know. Thank you xx

I suspect the vile messages are partly because they know they have acted illegally. Keep going OP and try to ignore it.

This. All their messages of abuse and refusal to cooperate will be there for the courts to see if needs be. You have followed all the steps to the letter and are going through official channels-keep focusing on that OP.

And I completely understand you wanting the keys. Your aunty's behaviour makes me think that there aren't any valuables in the house anyway, as she seems very fixated on the bank account, so while she may have already stolen some valuables (unfortunately), the majority of his estate is probably in the bank which she cannot access.

Gosh how awful. Keep going and ignore messages from your cousin. You are doing nothing wrong. I'd also ask for a list of the contents of the house from your aunt . She shouldn't be clearing the house without your permission and is acting illegally. You are the legal next of kin and the only beneficiary of your Dad's estate and your cousin and aunt will just have to accept it. Good luck and keep us all posted!

you can also complete an online “lost bank accounts” trace. I think it also checks for premium bonds.

A lot of banks were pretty quick to check, others took a bit longer.

pretty sure I got the info from the money saving expert website.

Thank you so much for still helping and listening to me. The coroners office is now closed so will have to wait until tomorrow. But they've asked me some questions via email which makes me think they are filling out his death certificate x

It's good that it's over email OP, it gives you more of a paper trail. Of course, call them in the morning too, but I would respond to their email in writing as well so it's clear you're the next of kin and are cooperating with them.

@LaurenOlivier yes I've responded on email and left messages. Thank to so much x

You can afford a solicitor OP - it will come out of your dad's money x

Only if he had any money! Otherwise OP will be liable to pay the solicitor because she engaged them.

Yes but it sounds like he did have money. If she can at least ascertain that...

@WingingItSince1973 Solidarity with you doing an amazing job being strong with such abuse being thrown at you. Stay strong, you’re doing the right thing.

Thank you all for your support. I've arranged his cremation. The coroner still needs to conclude his investigation but hopefully will release him soon. My aunty sent me over the forms she was sent by the bank to fill out for his finances. She's still insisting on cleaning and clearing the house. But now I'm getting nicer messages from her despite what she's sharing on Facebook about me. I will just block them all after this. I am still thinking about sharing some of dad's money but I will take my time to think about it. My children's needs come first as they all at different stages of life where some money would help them out. Anyway that's the update so far. I'm hoping the rest will be simple enough. Thank you xxx

Sounds like she has realised the bullying isn't working so she's going to try being nice to see if that guilt trips you into sharing the money.

I hope she understands that you need all the paperwork from the house to enable you to administer the estate. Utility bills, bank statements, letters about pensions, etc.

That's great OP. I'm glad she sent you the forms !

I wonder why she's so keen to keep the clearing of the property so exclusively to herself .

Hi OP, I have just read this thread, please stick with this, your family were trying to steal from you. Your dad could of easily left a will if he was so concerned as to who his estate would be left to. If you feel you need to share the estate then do but please let it be a token amount. Please keep the the majority for yourself - I hope it helps you and your family.

Why is your aunt so desperate and determined to clear the house? What's she hoping to find?

My guess is she's looking for the will which she knows left it all to his daughter and stupidly thought she'd get away with a 'verbal agreement ' overriding it
or for other accounts , building societies etc.

I'd suggest she's looking for cash and anything of value!! A lot of older people seem to hoard cash around the house. Please don't weaken op none of them deserve any money if there is any, keep it and make your life easier💐

Yes , could well be !

OP, Is it possible that your dad had other accounts as well as the bank one that you know about? Could your aunt have got hold of any building society accounts or insurance policy, etc. while clearing the house. There is a way to check if someone held accounts with different organisations. I would do this when the immediate problems are dealt with. I hope you are OK.

@WingingItSince1973 I completely agree with@Cantalever .
There must be something driving your aunt's actions in clearing the flat and I think it will be money.