Intestate question

[WingingItSince1973]

My dad died on Sunday. We didn't have a close relationship. I did try and keep up one with him but he was a stubborn man and I don't think really like me as we are very different people. My mum was a victim of dv and left him when I was a toddler (am 50 now). I had close relationship with aunties and grandparents on his side of family so saw him sporadically during my teens but nothing much during my adulthood. Anyway I was called to the hospital by my aunty and was with him when he died. He wasn't awake and I'm not sure if he knew I was there. So here's the thing. Aunty messaged me to ask if his name is on my birth certificate. It is and I sent her a screenshot. Now he didn't have a will and I'm and have been for the last 10 years his next of kin. No more children. He outlived his partner and they weren't married. There seems to be no legal papers anywhere to suggest anyone is next of kin. I'm being told now that a verbal agreement was my aunty and another uncle to have any money left over and treat myself and 3 others whatever that means. My aunty had a very close relationship with him along with my remaining two uncles. My question is would I be contacted regarding his 'estate'? He didn't own property and I have no idea of his finances. They are emptying his council house this week and have turned down my offers of help. There's also a chance now of compensation as he died with a condition bought about by his working environment and we are waiting for post mortem. My aunty wants to take over everything. Morally and legally what should I do? I'm not one for confrontation and it would be easier to give my aunty legal powers but then part of me thinks my dad owes me for never ever providing anything for me. I hate this though as I'm not at all materialistic but if there's a good amount of money it would really help my situation as I don't work due to illness and my poor dh shoulders the burden of earning a living and we live week to week. Sorry it's long. Hope someone can help advise what I should do xx

Thanks for all your replies. I'm getting there slowly. Latest questions have been was I adopted my step dad. No is the answer. Anyway have taken legal advice. Made some phone calls. It's all really waiting now on the coroner so not much more I can do. Just not answering anymore questions. I've been called all sorts today. Been told I've not treated my dad well. Told I'm a rubbish daughter. Told I should be ashamed of myself, that I'm pathetic and childish. So many things. But it's just making me dig my heels in more now. Whatever my relationship was like with my dad I can't change the fact he was my dad. Xx

Well done for standing your ground OP.
Their toxic behaviour towards you shows the sort of people they are.

They're behaving like this because they know they haven't got a leg to stand on OP, don't budge an inch.

@PamPamPamPam @AGovernmentOfLawsNotOfMen Thankyou. Any sympathy I had for them is dwindling. I never did say I wouldn't give them any money from his estate but they keep reminding me what his wishes were. Now they are just being nasty. This is won't be the last of it. They will be seeking ways to take it away from me. I wouldn't put it past them to order a dna test. X

They don't get to just "order a DNA test". Were your parents married when you were born?

I'm sorry they are acting so dreadfully to you op. Money really does bring out the inner arsehole in people ☹️

Good for you digging your heels in. I really wouldn't give them anything after this, why would you reward this terrible behaviour?

@KeepYourFingersOutOfMySoup My parents weren't married. My mum fell pregnant with me at 16 in early 70s. My dad was 20 at the time. They only stayed together for a couple years. It was a very turbulent relationship. I was in touch with his side of family all my life and used to stay over at my nans. He lived there too. I also used to stay at this aunt's house when I was a teen then we kept in touch via messages then Facebook so we all drifted really. I reached out loads to him and he responded the odd times. When I did see him at family funerals he was always nice. Drunk. But pleasant enough. Promised to keep in touch but I didn't hold out hope. Anyway that's just family stuff. Thank you xxx

Hi OP. As I said on your other thread, if I was your aunty I’d make sure you got every penny of your late dad’s estate.

If my DB had a child he hadn’t bothered with for the last 50 years, I would want to make things as right as they can be now.

Got to wonder why your dad didn’t make a will. He’s been ill for a long time. Maybe he DID want you to inherit and make things right after he was gone? All his promises to your aunty either didn’t happen, or he was just stringing her along.

Hopefully your solicitor will set your mind at ease.

good luck

OP you have my sympathy. Your aunt and cousin are behaving atrociously.

You may find this guide useful and I hope that the solicitor you spoke to today will also help you, as a matter of urgency.

https://www.gov.uk/when-someone-dies

@WingingItSince1973 dna?? omg how fitting would it be if it came out that this auntie was not even a full sibling of your dad?? It always boils down to greed

Do not agree to a dna test!
Also, how are they going to get his dna now? And if they said it has come from something in his house I'd worry it was someone else's entirely just to get the answer they are clearly after.

In a way it's good that they have shown their hand early. I'm so glad you have taken advice - well done. You have got fire in your belly now given then behaviour.

You got this. Don't let them get in your head - keep that anger at them. You got this.

I'm so sorry you are being treated this way .
I hope they've not cleaned out his bank account and taken anything off value from your father's home .
Good luck . Keep your head high and stay strong .

I'm sorry you are being treated like this by your own family OP.

Know that you are in the right.

Your dad was apparently ill for a long time and had mental capacity. Plenty of time to put his wishes in a legally binding will then. You only have their word on "what he wanted".

They're calling you all sorts. Well, they're crooks (and not very smart ones) so you win on the character side of things.

Your solicitor can swoop in now. I used to work for a probate solicitor. One of the biggest messes I ever saw involved intestacy and numerous people from pretty much every qualifying angle putting in their claim for a share. It was clear from the witness statements who the grabby ones were.

Here is a bit of information on bank accounts after death.

www.thegazette.co.uk/all-notices/content/103884

When you spoke to the coroner, did they say if they had issued an interim death certificate?

Either this or a full death certificate (which clearly hasn't been issued if the coroner is still involved) is required to show the bank. So if there isn't one, they are lying about his accounts being frozen.

They also can't withdraw money from his account before it is frozen, that's illegal. This happened when my FIL died. He had a will, DH and BIL were executors. Money was transferred out of his account before it could be frozen. Turned out SIL and her boyfriend had transferred it to a friend or relative of his. We found this out when we all found a message on their answerphone from somebody having an absolute tantrum over their bank account being frozen while an investigation was carried out. No idea what happened after that, as the bank paid back the missing money and never reported back on the theft. But yeah, they can't do that...

@WingingItSince1973 If your aunt has bank cards or internet access to your dads account, she maybe hasn’t informed bank he has died (despite what’s she’s telling you).

Try ringing the big banks (RBS, Barclays, NatWest etc) bereavement department to try to track down your dad’s account. Or even some advice on what you should do given the circumstances. I doubt they will give you any info, but just makes them aware of the circs pending receipt of the death cert.

when I was dealing with my late mums bank, they asked for the death cert serial number, so there must be a register they can refer to.

Hi. Thank you. Ok so no death cert yet but coroner said she will issue an interim one if there needs to be an inquest. My aunty said she went into Barclays Bank and they were happy to talk to her and freeze his account. I really don't know how they did that on her say so with no death cert but she does have a ref number for when there is a death certificate. They are still being awkward with dad's house keys. I spoke to council yesterday and said I'll receive a call in next 5 days. I'm going to insist the keys are given back to me this weekend although they say they are still clearing stuff out. I did stress that any money taken out of dad's account would be illegal and she went a bit mad at me for even suggesting it but still hasn't given me any banking details. I've asked about his debit card and hit a brick wall with that. Also she won't tell me his utility provider so I will need to access his account to find out his direct debit information. She's being a pain and deliberately awkward. X

Aunt can be as affronted at suggestions of impropriety as she likes. The fact is that in being obstructive, she is giving the impression that there is impropriety.

She's the one throwing roadblocks down and creating an air of deviousness.

Well at least you know it's Barclays. Call them up and explain that dad has died intestate and you are awaiting death cert and that you will be applying for probate. Explain to them that other relatives do not have authority to act so they should not be acting on those instructions

Totally agree. Wonder if the Bereavement Dept is open on a Saturday?

Well, we know the Aunt says it's Barclays.

Depending on bank policy, it's possible anyone can 'have the account frozen'. Banks do this to stop any untoward activity. Think about it, have you ever gone abroad to then find your bank card gets blocked when you try to use it?

In really simple terms, banks have a duty to stop everything in its tracks if they have any suspicion that someone might be using the account when they shouldn't.

If someone for some bizarre reason told a bank someone was dead when they weren't, they would probably freeze it until they account holder proves that actually they're alive.

Anyway, at this point, the main thing to sort is just making sure the account is frozen. Either by you or someone else.

We also experienced someone accessing a relative's account after they died but like the other poster, the bank investigated and repaid the money, probably because it was less trouble than pursuing a theft prosecution.

OP, I really think you need to meet a locksmith at the house today to arrange for new locks to be fitted. Even if your aunty gives you the keys back, she could have made copies. Have you asked her what she has removed from the house? Surely anything she has taken would amount to theft?

I agree with @Growlybear83 . I suppose they might be clearing quickly to avoid any rent liability but they n could also be looking for building soc accounts, cash,. Even a will that they can dispose of .
For people like this low will never be sufficiently subterranean.

They are t even trying to hide their greed are they. Asking if you were adopted my God
They deserve nothing. You and your CHILDREN do

I spoke to the bank today. As it was my aunty who informed them of his death they will only speak to her unless she phones them and gives them permissions to speak to me. But when the death certificate has been issued, whoever is named on that (as in next of kin) then the bank will only deal with them. Now I know why my aunty was so keen for her to keep liaising with coroner. I've been reminded today by that side of the family how I've devastated my aunty taking that side of things from her. Anyway an interim death cert doesn't name anyone so if it goes to inquiry I don't know how long after that the real death certificate will take. I need to ask the coroner again on Monday. I will also make sure the coroner confirms I'm her first port of call. The bank said if a dispute is raised any funds in his account will be frozen until it's sorted out. I'm worried my aunty can convince the coroner it was my dad's wishes for her to be on his death certificate. Is that possible?

My cousins had asked if my aunty can still organise his funeral. The direct cremation, no service. Apparently it will crush her if I don't and he wanted to be with his deceased partners ashes which I have no issue with whatsoever as I know he loved her.

Regarding the house I've been told that my aunty will clean it as she knows my dad would be absolutely devastated for anyone to see it in the state it's in. I know this would be true. He was very proud. But he couldn't look after the house properly and his dogs were allowed anywhere. It wasn't in the best state when I last was there so can imagine being in his own the last few years and just drinking and smoking himself to oblivion it's not nice so I do think she's telling the truth.

The bank did say all his direct debits and standing orders would have been cancelled but I still don't know the utilities despite me constantly asking. They are being very awkward. I don't know how I can force them. Anyway thanks for keeping replying. It's not the most exciting of topics but I do appreciate it xx