My BF wants to sue me for custody of unborn child

[Figuresofdelight]

I need advice on this one. I found out i was pregnant after being for one year with my BF. I told him the day i found out and he looked horrified. The next day he declared i had to have an abortion because we're not ready. I am 35 and have been wondering for some time if i will ever be able to have a child. We don't (yet) live together with my BF. Of course i disagreed with him. It quickly turned nasty. He's been harassing le by phone and stalking me at my place for me to have the abortion. Now he says he will get revenge if I go through with pregnancy and refuse to have the abortion. He has seen a lawyer, and he intends to sue me and get full custody of the child the moment it comes into the world. He will say i have a history of MI.
All this is crushing me. How could he be so full of hatred and revenge, when he used to joke nonstop about having a cute baby to ourselves.
Can he really get custody. Should i have the abortion?

If you decide not to keep it you still need to cut him from your life. He is a dangerous and unstable man.

will this ever end?

No, you've got at least sixteen years of this ahead of you.

Why are you involving him? The more he knows about the pregnancy the more he will threaten and control you. Just block him, have the baby (if that's what you want) and stop all contact. If he keeps pestering you report him to the police. Going back and forth will not help you. He will not change and you will never get a moments peace while he's on the scene.

He sounds like he’s already married.

Are you still planning on having an abortion?
I’m mot sure why you even told him the date and time of the scan.

No it will never end. He has made that quite clear.

You either terminate the pregnancy or resign yourself to dealing with ALL of his shit for the next 18 years (and as much of his shit as you can't dodge after that). You are tied to him for the life of your child. The best case - if unlikely - scenario might be him just disappearing but your child will still want to know who his/her father is and may well reach out in the teen years and wham he is back in your life.

If you intend to keep this pregnancy, please do it with your eyes wide open. Believe his behaviour - it is telling you how he will be/how he is. In fact, his words are telling you the same thing.

I often tell my children that the single most important decision you make in your life in my experience is who you decide to have your children with. nothing is more important.

@Figuresofdelight

Hello all, I'm back on here and seemingly back to where i started. After a week of calm, i asked him to come with me to my first big scan. He was cold and hard throughout. Now he's back to threatening me with the courts if i keep the baby... will this ever end?

Why did you ask him to the scan ? He's showing you who he is , he won't change. Please don't tie yourself to him.