Potential grandparent requesting DNA test..

[user1499775533]

Hi, was wondering if anyone knows if a potential paternal grandparent can request DNA by starting the mediation process etc. Any advive would be appreciated.

@Greensleeves my ex partner has said today that our elder Daughter is going nowhere, he said her home is with me and this is where she should be. She's at pre school nursery 5 days a week too so the weekends are our times, not for a narcissistic grandparent. Our Daughter would hate having to be there alone and would see it as a punishment. This is why I'm fighting tooth and nail this time, i have to for my kids freedom or she'll be forever trapping them with her on court orders. And in regards to my baby there is just no way! Who would want to hand their baby over in these circumstances. My ex is not supportive of her at all and i know he won't be agreeing to anything. Just a shame it has to be like this and i feel bad for him that she behaves like this, but she'll never change so i have to forsee it through this time for the sake of my children and my emotional health.

my ex partner has said today that our elder Daughter is going nowhere, he said her home is with me and this is where she should be....... .......My ex is not supportive of her at all and i know he won't be agreeing to anything.

So he's dropped the "keep me out of it" attitude and is finally going to support you and tell his Mother he doesn't support her.

He's going to step up and treat his children equally and have contact with them both or only continue parenting only one of his children or be a twat and stop contact with his eldest and leave you to pick up the pieces from two adults in her life not having contact..

Will His views have any weight with Cafcas given that he has zero involvement with the baby, doesn't financially support them despite having the funds to do so and doesn't see his eldest very much. Will they give his wishes and concerns as much weight as yours as he has minimal contact with only one child and isn't around them much to see the emotional impact of contact with gran?

I don't know what cafcass will recommend. Last time they did go in my favour suggesting that our Daughter should visit with my ex as this was part of our arrangements. My ex does work 6 days a week too so makes visits hard as he is busy like most of our lives. I hope he will stand up to his mother finally but i feel he should of done it along time ago like his other brother did. Her behaviour and court applications all come down to lack of boundaries and her refusal to accept or respect that I'm the mother to my children. She feels she has special rights and anyone that dares to put healthy boundaries down is the enemy because she feels she should be able to act like a parent and override the actual parents. She is a piece of work and i don't want to be around her at all but i know an order could possibly be made in my absence if i don't attend court.

Since the birth of my elder Daughter I've had to deal with her behaviour. She has said you have to share your children and believes i should hand my Daughter over at her request or she'll take you to court. I've been living like this for 3 years never knowing when she'll strike again, i told cafcass too that my biggest fear was agreeing to something with her because she would keep applying to the courts for more and more. It isn't just your average gran wanting visits, this is a woman that has to have her own way and it's more about the fight than the children involved. The more orders that are put down on my children for her, give her the fuel for her fire, and make her believe she has some form of parental rights. When i have tried communicating with her she will either ignore you or tell you she has no idea what you mean or tell you you must have mental health problems because basically you stand up to her and try and put boundaries down. She doesn't seem to acknowledge or appreciate how important these are. It's like hitting your head against a wall. I have tried and tried with her but unfortunately the person she is you just can't get anywhere with. She's an extremely abusive woman too so it is hard. At this point i don't trust her and if you offer her an inch she'll take a mile which is why I'm sticking to no contact with my baby and hopefully to get the order suspended with my Daughter.