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Infertility

Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

FET Sept/Oct

996 replies

Lolly2803 · 02/09/2016 17:36

Hi ladies,
I am due to start an FET in Sept/Oct and wondered if anyone else was too?! Had my first cycle of IVF in August but due to fluid in my uterus and thin lining had to freeze everything. I seem to always have fluid mid cycle, including natural cycles. Very worried that it will always be a problem and will never get to use my embryos. Having a hysteroscopy the week after next to check incase anything in there but doc suspects not. Would be great to have a few buddies! xxx

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Lolly2803 · 30/09/2016 19:21

How's everyone doing tonight?

I was meant to be out but left my husband to it with friends. I've not been sleeping well for the past 3 weeks or so. Taking hours to get to sleep and waking in the night. I've been so emotional and anxious. Worrying about everything and crying all the time when I'm alone but not wanting to be with people much. My job is quiet stressful at times and I'm not enjoying so that hasn't helped. I am actually really struggling at the moment and not sure how to get out of it.

Anyone else had anything similar?

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Bear2014 · 01/10/2016 06:42

Sorry you're feeling that way Lolly Sad this whole thing definitely puts a strain on everyone in different ways.

My OH is super stressed with work at the moment so I don't really feel i can offload on her about the fertility stuff... Hence Mumsnet etc! We've both been sleeping badly and it's hard not to niggle each other. You're not alone xx

HelloMist · 01/10/2016 11:33

Welcome, pinkapples! Glad you're feeling OK so far.

Has your rash gone, Bear? How was your West End visit?

So sorry you're struggling Lolly. :( Bear's right, this stuff is hard on us, and the lack of sleep must be getting to you. It's also difficult if you're keeping a lot of it inside and don't feel like you can talk to anyone openly. Not sure what to suggest but offering sympathy and hoping things look up for you soon Flowers

Hope there was some useful discussion at your appointment, banana.

Lolly2803 · 01/10/2016 11:46

Thanks ladies! The only person I can really talk to is my OH and he is great but he says he doesn't know how to make me feel better so just doesn't know what to say - and that's the thing there isn't anything anyone can say! I've told our parents about the IVF and they've been great but nobody else knows (apart from my boss) so it's quiet lonely. I'm sure all you ladies have felt like this and worse so I shan't moan anymore!! Think it's just the waiting that's the worst! Just got to wait for AF now which should be here in the next 2 weeks or less so not too much longer.

How are you ladies all getting on? Xxx

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Bear2014 · 01/10/2016 11:47

Hi Mist, marks are still there, they are like tiny insect bites which is odd. No more have sprung up so hopefully insect in question has left the building!

Cinema was good thanks, always good to have a chuckle (watched Bridget Jones, aka freakishly fertile 43 year old Grin)

Have you had any symptoms, Mist? I'm a little achy with a vague sensation that there might be something there, but could well just be the drugs.

Hope everyone is having a nice Saturday!

HelloMist · 01/10/2016 12:10

ah, didn't read movie and thought it was a show! (makes sense now why it was lunch). I'd like to see Bridget Jones. Glad you had some laughs and company. DD and I saw some friends yesterday for first time in a while. We kept missing opportunities because of clinic visits.

I've had similar, Bear! Some aches and the same sort of sensation. Feel like they could be good or bad aches though so it doesn't help. I looked back at my diary and apparently last time I had sensitive boobs and nipples - which I didn't remember. Hoping that perhaps because I breastfed my boobs now may not feel the same. (Or that it's still too early).

Our TV has broken! Well the colours are all wrong. Just at a time when I'd like to snuggle up in front of it more than usual. :( Bakeoff on a tablet isn't the same!

Bear2014 · 01/10/2016 12:13

I totally know what you mean about the boobs. I BF for 22 months so I don't think mine will ever be sensitive again! Why can't there just be a window in our tummies so we can peek in and see what's going on?! It's the only reasonable solution.

Gaah to the TV, how annoying! You'll just have to go to the cinema ;o)

bananafish81 · 01/10/2016 15:56

Hello all, gosh so much to catch up on. Will get my usual rambling essay over with to update you on the latest with my toxic uterus, then get the me me me out the way so I can reply properly to you all.

Had our WTF appt with my Dr yesterday. He was really sad for us about the outcome of this cycle, but didn't think I was a lost cause. He said I did propagate a pregnancy before (albeit one with sudden foetal demise) and we need to get me back to that place. If I hadn't been properly pregnant before, we might be in a different situation. But that gives him hope. He was really apologetic - we said well the facts are the facts, it's no one's fault and there's no sense in sugar coating it. And he said 'yes, but you're nice people and you've been through a hell of a lot, and I really want this to work for you!'. So we have someone batting for us really hard.

He said something definitely did implant and start to invade the endometrium, it wasn't failed implantation, it was a very early miscarriage - but as far as he's concerned the issue definitely lies with the endometrium and its ability to support a pregnancy (which I agree with). He said we've got the embryos and they're not going anywhere. So the plan is to work on my lining over the next few months.

Hysteroscopy is confirmed for Weds, but will thankfully be less of a D&C (and more of a light clean and polish) as amazingly, there's no crap left in my uterus, despite not having had a proper period (yes, apparently you can absorb uterine lining).

Copper IUD goes in on Weds when he's doing the hysto, and we do one month of HRT and see if I get a bleed. Probably repeat again then take IUD out. The copper generates an inflammatory reaction which causes the endometrium to thicken - it's why women who get a copper coil tend to have very heavy periods. So the copper IUD is used in cases of Ashermans syndrome (even if that's not what I have, we're treating me as if I do) to kick the lining into gear and restore menstruation.

Then we will do a mock FET. We'll do endometrial biopsies to see what the lining is actually doing from a histology POV, not just what the scan says it's doing - one in the first half of the cycle in the proliferative phase, then after starting progesterone he's recommended we do the ERA biopsy (the one which looks at the lining during the implantation window to see how receptive it is).

Depending on how they go, whether we have to try different combinations of FET drugs if I still don't respond well to oestrogen (eg Tamoxifen), maybe a few months down the line we could be in a position to actually do a treatment cycle for real and put one of our PGS tested frozen embryos back. Until then it's back onto the bench of boredom I go...

The universe has a funny sense of humour that HRT and contraception are supposed to help me to get and stay pregnant 🤔

Lolly2803 · 01/10/2016 16:18

Hey Banana! Great to hear from you, we'd missed you. This guy sounds like an absolute legend. Obviously this is a shit situation but there is so much to be positive about reading through your post. He's clearly "team banana" and rooting for you more than ever. All you've said makes total sense and I'm sure with every step he'll learn a bit more to get you to that all important FET. The boredom and the waiting is shit there's no getting away from it - it's worse than anything in some ways I think! But at least you're working towards a goal. With Christmas soon upon us I think the last few months of the year will go super fast then likely in the new year it will be time to try again. 2017 could be YOUR year - God knows it's about bloody time. We'll be here to keep you company. xxx

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Bear2014 · 02/10/2016 18:58

Wow Banana, your doctor really does sound great. If anyone can do it, he can, right?! You are so knowledgeable too, which I'm sure must help as you can make some very well informed decisions. Really hope you can move forward and make some progress. At least you do have those great embryos waiting in the wings.

I'm having a bit of an odd 2ww. I felt basically nothing the first few days, and i've had no spotting which has been my pregnancy giveaway in the past. But yesterday and today I just have that pregnant feeling, that i want nothing pressing on my belly and a bit tender and achy. It could be the Cyclogest playing cruel tricks but we'll see. What's the earliest you would test?? (FRER).

Hope everyone else is well and has had a good weekend Smile

Bear2014 · 03/10/2016 10:17

I tested this morning because I'm an idiot. Wasn't even proper FMU as I was up in the night with DD. 6 days past transfer. Please tell me it's far too early?!

Lolly2803 · 03/10/2016 11:43

Bear it is too early!! Hang on in there and give it a few more days. When is OTD? Don't get upset honestly, it's still too early to tell. I know it's hard to resist though but you're almost there! xxxx

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Bear2014 · 03/10/2016 11:46

Thank you for being the voice of reason Lolly! I kind of did it in a bit of a haze without really thinking. It's driving me crazy this time as I really can't call it either way. xx

Lolly2803 · 03/10/2016 11:54

I can only imagine you must be going crazy!! It must feel like the longest 2ww ever! Especially with how much investment goes into it both emotionally, physically and financially at times. But hang on in there, you're doing great. When is OTD? Im waiting for AF to start my FET meds and it's about 10-12 days away and I'm struggling to keep emotionally sane with only that so can only imagine it's X1 million in the 2WW!! xxx

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Bear2014 · 03/10/2016 12:13

Oh it's all about as annoying the whole way through, I reckon. I find the wait between attempts hard going as it just feels like time is marching on and you're getting nowhere.

OTD is Sunday. I was planning on holding out until Thursday so it's all very early days xx

Lolly2803 · 03/10/2016 12:40

Aw it's super early then! Do not worry yet or you'll drive yourself mad.
To be honest I agree with you! I've actually found the waiting in between treatment an absolute nightmare and haven't coped very well with it at all. I've actually found it emotionally harder than my IVF cycle. I wish i could just stay in bed till AF! So much easier.

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pinkapples · 03/10/2016 14:39

I've been googling the earliest day to test too! Must stay away from the test!!! 9dpt is Sunday for me so I guess that's the earliest but I am going to hold out for next Thursday... no spotting or much feeling yet either way a little achey but nothing to write home about....
I made the switch to non caffeine teas too (I miss Costa) luckily I read before I drank as all the fruit teas I bought contain hibiscus so wasted my money there and settled for redbush tea! FAIL... tastes tolerable but if I am preggers I don't know if I'll survive Shock
Hope everyone else is doing ok? cx

pinkapples · 03/10/2016 14:39

I've been googling the earliest day to test too! Must stay away from the test!!! 9dpt is Sunday for me so I guess that's the earliest but I am going to hold out for next Thursday... no spotting or much feeling yet either way a little achey but nothing to write home about....
I made the switch to non caffeine teas too (I miss Costa) luckily I read before I drank as all the fruit teas I bought contain hibiscus so wasted my money there and settled for redbush tea! FAIL... tastes tolerable but if I am preggers I don't know if I'll survive Shock
Hope everyone else is doing ok? cx

Bear2014 · 03/10/2016 15:18

I think I'm going to go again on Thursday (9dpt). I would possibly have considered waiting til OTD but my in-laws are going to be here then and I can't really deal with all that at the same time. Very sensible to wait though.

I wouldn't worry too much about the caffeine thing - NHS says you can have the equivalent of one regular coffee or 4 regular teas per day. Which is what I did throughout treatment and pregnancy with DD. Along with the odd glass of wine. This time I'm being more cautious because it's been a shit year TTC and it's nice to feel like you're doing everything you can. That said, I still have one proper cup of Yorkshire tea in the morning to wake me up. Then I stick to Yorkshire decaf or decaf green tea. I hate redbush too - yuck. xx

pinkapples · 03/10/2016 15:49

Yea I gave up caffeine with my 1st as I'd had 3 miscarriages so wanted no excuses and I feel it's only fair to give this baby (if there is one) the same treatment lol Smile so it's redbush for me for the time being but if I get that far I may have normal tea towards the middle x

HelloMist · 03/10/2016 16:14

Echoing the others, Banana, really great your doctor is such a champion for you and has lots of ideas and optimism!

Bear, I really didn't have many obvious symptoms last time. for quite a while, even past the BFP. And they say each pregnancy can be different. Sorry you were driven to test (I had thoughts of doing so in the middle of the night but resisted once I was up!). I have heard that around this time some get faint results but that it's too early for most. Try and hold on until Thursday!

I've been having 1-2 cups of coffee (occasionally 3, occasionally 1 being a cafe latte type one) this time and did last time with DD all the way through. I feel it's important for me to feel myself and relaxed as much as to be "good" and I think I would struggle without caffeine! I do try to replace with tea or decaff where I can but am more a (proper) coffee drinker. I have some chocolate too.

I thought redbush was a bit nicer with milk than without but wouldn't choose it regularly. I like fruit teas but only now and then :)

Pinkapples, does your clinic give a later test date too then? mine is "only" 9dp5dt.

Lolly, the waiting is awful (at any stage). x

Lolly2803 · 03/10/2016 17:19

Ladies you are all doing SO well hanging in there!! I'm with you in spirit and sending positive vibes!

One of my team told me she is pregnant today. Obviously thrilled for her but felt a bit like a kick when I'm down type of feeling as id had an awful day yesterday being so upset. Spent the day with a friend who's almost 3 months pregnant and I was again absolutely thrilled but just kept thinking "I so want this to be me and feel as happy as you soon". Decided to feel positive today and then this has made me feel a bit more down. Never mind eh?!! Hurry up AF so I can get going!! CD19 today. xxx

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pinkapples · 03/10/2016 22:04

My clinic gave me a test to do 14dp5dt!!! I'll hopefully wait that long welll see... milk in redbush? May have to give that a try I had hot lemon water tonight which was a bit different so we'll see how I go :)

Bear2014 · 04/10/2016 06:08

I can't believe the different OTDs given by different clinics - it's crazy! By 14 days it should jump out of the pee stick and play its own little fanfare Grin

HelloMist · 04/10/2016 08:20

I like that image Bear Grin yes, I've been thinking that!

I've only got a basic test strip in the house.. Am allowing myself to buy proper tests tonight (feels like a milestone to get to) so temptation isn't there too early. I didn't sleep well last night Sad doesn't often happen but has a few times since ET. DD was hard work yesterday, hope she is better today as I know my husband will be back a bit later than yesterday.