This Morning - No mention of Little Arthur

[smileanddance]

The horrendous case of Arthur is at the forefront of all our minds this week, and all other live TV shows seem to be discussing the case, however Phil and Holly have not so much as uttered a word about him this week. They are so smiley and happy and I just find it really disrespectful and surprising that they haven't even acknowledged him. AIBU??

OP I suggest you brace yourself for the details that will no doubt be all over the media in the next week or so when the verdicts are delivered in the Star Hobson trial.

And hopefully This Morning won't be featuring it either!

I wouldn't say the whole country is in tatters. Some people are unaffected, others like me are very upset. I've been in tears for the last hour thinking about him (and many times before) but I don't think the whole country shares this level of feeling, although I know many do. I don't expect every TV programme to be talking about it. In fact I wish everyone would just stop. Every time I hear a new detail I find it unbearably painful. For those saying "You don't have to read every detail" Well I DIDN'T! I scrolled past every news article, trying not to read even the headlines, I certainly didn't watch the video, I turned the tv off when the news came on but still - I've absorbed so much information about it. I don't think people like me are "grief vultures". Some people are very upset and it offers some relief to mention it on a forum like this.

HeartsAndClubs

Your post describes my thoughts exactly.
Especially:

And frankly I find the fact that anyone would want to watch the video which was hawked about all over the press and the internet as if it’s some kind of entertainment bloody sick. why does anyone want to watch that? why?

There is no reason other than to jump on a bandwagon and paint yourself as the victim you’re not.

@Medievalist

I feel like the TV shows should be discussing what can be done to improve the system, what we as the public can do to help, what charities we can all donate to, what we can do if we are concerned about any children etc

Improvements to the system need to come from the government and those responsible for children's services not TV.

You need TV to tell you what charities you can donate to? Really? You've never heard of charities like the NSPCC or Childline?

You need TV to tell you what to do if you witness or suspect child abuse? You wouldn't think of contacting social services, the police, school safeguarding officers?

What happened to Arthur was horrific, but I am not in tatters over it and I don't need support from the likes of Phil and Holly. The idea that people need 'support' if they see or hear something upsetting on TV is quite frankly ridiculous. There is so much suffering and cruelty in the world (have you seen the latest reports and photos of starving children in Afghanistan?) it's crass to think that it's the viewer that needs support and help.

I think this is very astute. This is just one sad story amongst thousands, really. I think it's a bit much to think that this one story is so above all of the other terrible things happening every day that it needs weeks of reporting dedicated to it and everyone responding as though it's totally unprecedented. Surely as adults we all know lots of things as bad as this are happening all the time and aren't just learning about abuse due to this case?

@smileanddance

Okay message heard loud and clear, I am BU! I don't think the TV execs should have ever shared those horrific videos with the general public in the first place, but now they have without any trigger warnings, they need to take responsibility and offer content with support for what they have made us witness. Not all of us are lucky enough to have real life support and I think you'd be surprised at the number of people who do rely on TV shows like these for support.

You want support and help over your own mawkish indulgent gawping at the murder of a child who had no.... Support or help?

Is that right OP?

So do you have any self awareness at alll?

We're a nation of massive hypocrites. We weep and wail over the death of this poor child but are not prepared to fund and pay more tax for systems and professionals that could help him and others.

Then we forget until the next poor child.

We're the same with those poor migrants dying in the channel. The death of them is a tragedy but if they live and make it to our shores they are a problem, a burden etc.

I remember crying when I heard a news story about a little boy being killed by a crocodile in an animal park in America. At the time I was TTC and couldn't believe that something so awful could happen in the blink of an eye. I kept imagining myself in that situation and it really affected my mental health. Obviously paired with the desperation to have my own DC and the fact my brain was punishing me by replaying the images.
Instead of turning to TV for support, I went to the drs and was diagnosed with anxiety.

Feeling an exaggerated amount of emotion to an even which isn't related to you at all is a sign of poor mental health, not the other way round. Fair enough feel sad, want to make a difference, look into what options are available to you...don't rely on TV to do this for you.

@smileanddance

Wow can now clearly see why our nation has a national mental health crisis. God forbid you should to dare to display any emotion!

That's a really weird leap. Endlessly raking over the details of one very sad incident for the rest of time is not going to have a positive impact on anyone's mental health.

@SuperHeroSweepStake

We're a nation of massive hypocrites. We weep and wail over the death of this poor child but are not prepared to fund and pay more tax for systems and professionals that could help him and others.

Then we forget until the next poor child.

We're the same with those poor migrants dying in the channel. The death of them is a tragedy but if they live and make it to our shores they are a problem, a burden etc.

^this

The competitive 'I'm more heartbroken than you' stuff is quite disturbing. If you want to help, look at lobbying your MP for greater financial provision and training for social workers. Donate to the NSPCC. Call out behaviour you see from people who appear to be acting aggressively towards their children in public. Don't just sit on your sofa wailing about how Holly Willoughby isn't doing a five minute segment on one story.

It's too sensitive a topic for them to be talking about on a light hearted entertainment show. They wouldn't do it justice. They do talk about serious and upsetting topics at times but not of this nature.

@CampagVelocet

The competitive 'I'm more heartbroken than you' stuff is quite disturbing. If you want to help, look at lobbying your MP for greater financial provision and training for social workers. Donate to the NSPCC. Call out behaviour you see from people who appear to be acting aggressively towards their children in public. Don't just sit on your sofa wailing about how Holly Willoughby isn't doing a five minute segment on one story.

yy it was called Competitive Sadding on here years ago, the trope of a spiral of I am more sadder than you is very striking.

And if you're not crying about this, you're clearly not an empathetic, feeling person like I am.

It's bizarre how many self centered people will tell you that they're actually the most sensitive person they know.

There are threads on here where a hardcore group of posters are on every single one. Every one of them. Dissecting it all under the guise of ' becomes it's so awful.'

It is awful. I don't have words really. I can't comprehend it and I refuse to watch the cctv clips or the audio stuff.

Because where does it being awful end and grief performance theatre take over?

Right here on Mumsnet. Like I said, some posters are neck deep in it all and I find that so mawkish, disrespectful and downright nosey

I am not in the U.K., but I know the broad details of the case.

I don't watch This Morning, but I'm guessing that people may well watch programmes like This Morning for a bit of light entertainment.

It really is not at the forefront of everyone's minds, and it doesn't warrant some sort of blanket media coverage, which helps absolutely no one. These things are essentially private tragedies.

They used to cover very upsetting stories in the past, but I think the show has gone down the ‘entertainment’ route.

These things are essentially private tragedies.
Well, no – the abuse and murder happened in private, but this is like saying domestic violence is a private matter between husband and wife. I agree that a lot of the threads on MN, and the tabloid coverage, has had a prurient, poring over the details, “look another CCTV video for us to despair over” unpleasant taste to it all. But I disagree hugely that it’s a private tragedy or that the case is not in the public interest to be discussed.

I don’t think light entertainment TV programmes are the right place for discussion, and I think the OP needs to take personal responsibility for her news consumption instead of this idea of being “made” to consume things, but I disagree wildly with child abuse being a “private tragedy” to happen behind closed doors, let’s all look away. That’s the exact problem.

@MurielSpriggs well I disagrees with that!

Child abuse is everyone's business and we all have a role to play in stopping it

Grief theatre is another matter

This Morning will cover stories its usually if someone has written a book or a documentary Is on they will have parents of friends of, on talking about it. I think the difference here is the op wanted some sort of support item or another dissection of this awful murder which this morning won't do..

*Child abuse is everyone's business and we all have a role to play in stopping it

Grief theatre is another matter*

Well put.

@gamerchick

I haven't seen any videos. I don't want to see any videos, it hasn't been hard to avoid.

This.

I have avoided clicking any video clips online, and I don't watch day time TV so have spared myself seeing unnecessary clips you cannot unsee.

The amount of people who have made the murder of this little boy about themselves and their feelings is abhorrent.

I just find it strange that the whole nation is in tatters over this awful story

Erm...