Graduation present - is it a thing?

[Treviarpelli]

Dd graduates this year, we’re beyond proud, we have funded her and will celebrate with her generously- but it’s only just occurring to me that graduation gifts are a thing?
Likewise flowers on the day, she seems to think they’re a thing, I think they’ll be a pain in the arse waste of money personally

Yes because that’s what a graduate needs…a teddy! 😅 no 21/22 year old ACTUALLY wants a teddy!! Ffs

Thank you. We’ve brought her lots of jewellery etc for birthdays and Christmas etc. so didn’t want to get her anything like that.
This sent of books is very personal to her, probably only DH and I really know just how passionate she is about topic and it relates to her degree too. We will also take her out for dinner on the day.

I graduated in 2021, we went for a meal out I think it's mad to expect presents (that and I've never heard of that being a thing!)

Reading about cars, flats, diamond earrings and all expense's paid holidays…. Just mind blowing…

My Mum bought her a graduation teddy when I graduated 35 years ago
It was very unlike her
It has sat next to my bed every where I lived for the last 35 years
I do think going out for a meal,paying for photos etc is standard, if you want to do presents that is in addition
I sent my niece flowers and gave and my nephew £300

I didn’t get anything when I graduated and my parents didn’t pay towards me going to uni either (my dad loaned me the rent money each year as it was cheaper to pay upfront and I paid it back in full throughout the year).

Saying that though, your daughter has asked for flowers. Of all the gifts I’ve seen mentioned, flowers is the simplest, cheapest thing you could give her and you know she wants them. If she regrets it later when she has to carry them around then that’s on her, it’s better than feeling unloved by you refusing to buy them. It’s literally just flowers, I buy them for people all the time when they’re just feeling a bit meh, I can’t imagine begrudging buying them for my own daughter and for something as special as a graduation.

Just realised it’s 50 years since my graduation.
My parents were keen to give me something and gave a sewing machine which lasted 45 years.

Exactly. Kids are so spoilt these days. No wonder most are so self-absorbed!

Sorry what? you’ve lumped charms and jelly cats in with Birkins and Kelly’s?

It never crossed my mind to buy graduation presents. My children all know we are proud of them and we did fund their living expenses whist at Uni along with being supportive parents.

It was a last minute impulse but I bought my son a college tie… he even occasionally wears it, I have seen evidence.

I remember someone in my graduation year getting a new car for getting a 3rd. I got bugger all from my parents and I got a first in the 1980s when that was not easy. Not bitter, honest!

I went abroad to university. My friends got:
a BMW convertible, Corvette, boob job, 3m trip to Europe, one got an apartment so she could get to her new job without facing too much traffic. I didn’t get anything, lol

Flowers definitely seem to be a graduation thing these days, for the girls at least. Yes they'll be a pain, yes it's a bit pointless, but also... they do look lovely in the photos and it's just one day! 💐

There is no "thing" with regard to graduations. It is personal and up to every graduate to choose what they like, within reason.

When I graduated I wasn't even that interested in going to the ceremony but my parents wanted it. My father got his secretary to organise a trip for us to Scotland (sort of work related socialising!) to watch the golf (my university was in southern England!) that was more for his and my sibling's enjoyment than anyone else's! I was offered a trip to the theatre in Edinburgh to watch a semi professional group in a musical (not bad) and my mum treated us to dinner at a very nice Michelin star restaurant - that was one thing I and everyone else enjoyed. That said, many graduates' parents can barely afford to pay for attending the ceremony so I was very lucky in comparison.

It sounds like your DD would like flowers so sure, why not. She has worked hard and will only graduate from a first degree once. If you wish to do a gift. I would find something meaningful - not expensive- and write some thoughtful lines (not just "congratulations! Love Mum and Dad") on a beautiful card just in case she decides to keep ir and scrutinise it from time to time. Something relevant to university studies or her time at college like a diary or journal to write in, or an elegant photo frame, or a beautiful fountain pen.o

I totally agree! Financial support through university and no student debt. You’re welcome.

I do get the pressure though when loads of other parents bestow expensive gifts.

Yes, my parents got me a Swarovski figure for my first one, a silver necklace for my second one, and a silver bracelet for my third. I still wear the jewelry now at 58 years old and it’s a nice talking point. It doesn’t have to be expensive but it’s lovely to have something as a keepsake. If she’s into Pandora or similar then a graduation charm would be appropriate.

You seriously think most graduates are getting these things as gifts?

OP if she wants flowers then get her flowers, a bit of a pain carrying them round all day but not really worth quibbling over.

A graduation teddy is the one thing my DD has specifically asked for.

No to flowers. I think a little token gift is fine if you want to mark the occasion. We got DD a inexpensive necklace with an owl pendant, paid for her dress and a lovely meal afterwards.

My parents are buying me a graduation Dcuk as I collect them.

We had dds last year, I bought her a pair of the doc martens loafers she’d been eyeing up for a while. She was really touched. Her friends came to meet her before and bought her a big bunch of flowers then took them off back to their flat while dh dd and I went to the ceremony. The friends then met us afterwards and we paid for a very fancy slap up dinner for everyone. We went back to our hotel and dd went back and stayed with her friends and bought her flowers home with her the next day.
all in all very lovely but nothing over the top.

No I didn’t get any of that but lots of people did. My parents took us out for an ‘order anything you want all night’ dinner and drinks (me and sister graduated the same year)

Never heard of. The student loans are not enough to cover for expenses so in most cases parents have already paid a lot of dough to support for years.

Jesus, are we not paying enough without gap years, cars and fancy handbags? This certainly wasn’t a thing when I left university and it was free then! Good lord.