Countdown to A level results day - 2023

[HereWeGo2023]

Following on from the A level support thread I thought I would create one for results day.
Hopefully you will all join me for the long nail biting wait and the big day at the end of it!

@Forestfriendlygarden interesting stuff - the teenage brain is truly fascinating!

@SB1971 she probably needs to just decompress for a bit doesn’t she? What subject is going to be studying? Maybe she could do something related? Once her mates disappear in Sept/Oct she’ll probably snap into action, but I’d be like you and twitching for a plan (even a loose general one).

@Nugg , yes, they all had a great time in Porto. Did cathedral, 2 museums (that she can't remember the names of ), boat trip, cable car ride and lots of clubbing! She didn't recommend the beaches - said they were v windy and the sea was cold - but there was a good lido that they enjoyed chilling at. Have a great time with DS.

Hello there and welcome!

It's a tricky one isn't it? You want them also to have some space just to be after such a long haul with exams...but then structured is also good...

Deferred place at uni must have required a lot of planning and thought in itself. I met someone at the offer holders day who had done a year out.

Sounds like she is already eighteen. The work experience is good also...on lots of levels...

How about Teaching English as a second Language online certificate?

DD just started on the online course she needs to do to accept her offer of a place at Uni - so wondered why she has been so quiet this morning on her day off work - and was a bit worried, but it means she will keep her hand in with studying - and hopefully it will be a challenge for her...she needs to do so many hours to complete the online course so there is a bit of structure...

You are right!
I do need to chill a bit- is SO hard for me to let go and not be in control.

Good call also re TEFL - I will mention it in a non-controlling manner!

Hi @SB1971 Im a great believer that sometimes young people just need to be unscheduled and just “be” - and sometimes maybe be a little bored. They’ve had 14 years continuous schooling through some exceptional times.

I think sometimes as parents we feel time needs to be purposeful but it really doesn’t. My eldest had a gap year spent 50:50 working / travelling and that was fine - he needed the time to kick back, take stock and check he really wanted to go to Uni.

I mean this really gently but she needs to neither plan nor get cracking. It’s her gap year, she’s an adult and she should choose what do do. As much as we may like to think our dc should be doing this or that we are not them and should be letting young adults make their own choices - sometimes they are bad choices but that in itself is a great experience and a valuable lesson in itself.

sorry meant to add - and I know this is not what you are doing - I work in a grammar school with high achieving students and a great many feel their lives are scheduled by their parents and they aren’t allowed to make their own choices instead leading their parents version of a perfect life. This causes them no end of stress and harm.

Interesting one. I think if they are still living at home then contributing to the family unit is really important.

And yes, that involves a certain degree of planning and structure.

Contributing to the family unit as in cleaning / tidying / cooking / paying rent if appropriate yes of course but other than that young adults should have autonomy over their lives surely? To make their own choices and as I say maybe even be bored - it’s a trite cliche but being bored is really important. Young people these days are often massively over scheduled and feel they have little control over their lives which causes a whole raft of mental health issues.

I wasn't disagreeing Kitty. Sure there are probably a fair number of parents going along the lines you have described. Not part of my experience though.

Interesting discussions! DD is back from Europe later this week. Has just texted me to say she’s off again over the weekend to stay with some family on her dad’s side. I suppose it’s all practice for us for September - I really miss her, but it’s also been way easier than I expected. And I’m impressed at how relaxed I’ve been about her being away. I was expecting to feel really anxious.
No empty nesting here - we have two much younger ones to keep us busy. One of whom had a little trial day at school today, so both ends of the education spectrum looming!

DS back from first holiday to Corfu.

No arrests, no hospital trips, no tattoos, and all 15 of them managed to make the return flight, so we'll mark this one down as a success

Very hoarse and in bed by 9.30, saying how much he'd missed his mattress and duvet.

Snoring like a bear now.

DH and I are glad to have him back, even if it is just for 10 days before he goes away again.

DD just messaged to say she and 9 friends all made it safely to Prague. We had half of them stay overnight last night so they could all get a taxi to airport together. No way would our car fit five girls and their luggage! I am so glad to see DD finally relaxing.

What a journey/what journeys these are for us all! All different, but all with a common thread, literally!

It's really nice to hear about the joys and tribulations of others on the way...at times in recent years I've felt like I'm the only one going through this, perhaps because of the pandemic - maybe i was just head down focussed on getting through it, but obviously there are commonalities...

It's been just over two weeks since A level exams finished and rather than totally flopping - it's been quite fast moving - DD starting new job - sensibly stashing cash away for uni - meeting her BF. Starting online course for uni - me carrying on adjusting our finances as they will change again come October. Me adjusting to long term health condition and figuring out what i can do going forward.

DD off today to connect with a friend, she is hoping to get a day off Friday to go to Bristol and is then off to Spain two weeks on Saturday.

Can't help thinking the impact of full moon last Monday was quite something!

Isn't it sweet and funny.

I love to hear DD snoring too

I'm enjoying reading about all the different trips away and how other dc are spending their summers.

We have heartbreak here, unfortunately. An out-of-the-blue break up between dd and her boyfriend and she's very upset. In the week of her 18th birthday and year 13 prom - thanks for the timing, bf!

It's in dd's nature to power on through adversity, and she will, but it's awful to see her so devastated.

Oh gosh. That's difficult. Hand hold on offer. You are right Z. it is awful to experience. You wish you could take it away from them, and you know you can't...

That’s awful timing, but at least you’re there to help her through it. DS1’s GF dumped him a few weeks into the first term at uni, and we had to collect him and bring him home for a few days because he was so miserable.

Thanks for the hand hold, @Forestfriendlygarden , it's needed. You really do wish you could take the suffering from them, it's true - I have that dead weight feeling on my chest at the moment.

How awful for your poor ds and you, @SabrinaThwaite - at least here dd is surrounded by family and friends to help her through it. In your first weeks at uni trying to get settled is a brutal time to be dumped. Hope he's thriving now.

Oh gosh, heavens. Hand hold also.

Thanks - yes he is. I don’t blame the GF for dumping him (he wasn’t an attentive BF, at least he has learnt his lesson there) but it was a perfect storm of being ill, being dumped, my dad dying and finally the cat dying. He found it rough going for a few weeks and then met someone else and then it was all fine. I was glad that we were just a couple of hours drive away at the time.

Gosh, do you know that is the most challenging thing about this age group I find.

Things happen, stuff happens they are absolutely devestated - you end up drained talking them through it - and a week or so later...it is forgotten about. Swings and roundabouts, I'll never get used to it...

He’s 25 now and I still worry - especially because he can be accident prone and yet has a cavalier attitude to risk!