Parents and carers of anxious teens(part 8)

[MinionKevin]

Started a new thread as I can see previous OP hadn’t been on for a while.

Link to previous thread:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/feeling_depressed/4970868-parents-and-carers-of-anxious-teenspart-7?page=40

@destiel00
Am sure it's yet another thing to worry about but am sure things will fall in place.
When I was looking at DD to restart the year, I was surprised many offering late admissions. We were too late iny opinion for A levels but it may not be the same for all courses.
DD is now at a FE college and loves it there (not that she attends regularly though). She prefers it to her old school which was a super selective grammar.
There are a few things about college I am not happy about but then it's not about me and not even about her attainment anymore so I just keep quiet.
There is time and maybe DD will come around to it over the summer. In the meantime, keep enquiring. Admissions may work even after the colleges and schools finish.
Xx

@DarkChocHolic
Shes been accepted on one course and wait listed for a levels
It'll work out
I'm just so tired 😫

@destiel00 now spend the weekend on yourself and forget about it for a little while x

@Okisenough
Still got lots of driving/dropping off/picking up to do today as dd is at her hobby activity 😔
But dh and I are going out for lunch tomorrow ☺️ and older dd is away visiting bf til Wednesday.

Lunch cancelled - staff sickness apparently.
Probably a good job.
All I've done today is sleep and sit on the sofa watching Wimbledon 👀
Dd very tired after her hobby event yesterday - didn't get home till 1am 😬

So we’ve been doing okay regardless of the heat. We managed a day out and DD organised and went out with one of her friends. She’s now organising more, changed days.

We did have one meltdown, I think probably triggered by the heat and she is always worried about GCSE results.

I got the letter today to say she has been awarded pip until 2031. In total shock to be honest. After all the recent press I was 100% sure we would be turned down. I would like to still go back to work but finding something around her seems impossible still.

@MinionKevin
Bittersweet, I imagine.
I felt like that when my mum got her BB and AA no quibbles.
I also understand your issues re: work. I've turned down two jobs in the last few years I'd have loved to take, but 🤷‍♀️
Good your dd is getting out.
I'm not coping well in the heat - I never do. My celtic heritage is guess!
Dd is anxious about the new college/course.
I do think its the right one for her tbh.
Today will mostly be spent watching Wimbledon and eating ice lollies 🍭

@destiel00i see a lot of jobs that say they are part time and they aren’t really (30 hours, I know that is technically) or they are full fixed days.
I need hours I can kind of work around DD, bit of a pipe dream just now I think.

It’s a long wait for college etc to start. I wish there was more for young people to do.

@MinionKevin
Yes! Exactly.
We live in place with nothing for young people. And the few things there are close over the school holidays

@destiel00i complained when I was younger but there was lots more choice even then!

Yeah.
We had youth clubs, playschemes, trips out with social clubs

Hope everyone is coping ok with the school hols/ post exam time?
Dd is meeting a friend tomorrow then up to pils on thursday to do "jobs".
I don't think I've ever been so tired in my life.
Although I had great fun earlier deleting satchel one and go4schools apps off my phone! 😁

I very much enjoyed deleting the Go4schools and satchel one app from my phone earlier!
No more parentpay either!
😁

Why did I post that twice!?
(Time for bed!)

You have reminded me to do paretpay for DS now @destiel00
Glad about the pip @MinionKevin
It's good that DD is organising things with friends.
Hope the holidays are restful and enjoyable as possible

We are ok here..the usual ups and downs. DD is away on a trip with bf after so much unbelievable drama. I am glad to have her moods away from the house for a few days to be honest. We continue to do family therapy mostly without DD in it..but the sessions are really helpful and DH and I are slowly learning to manage DDs situations as a team and make a plan etc. it still is a lot of hard work and sometimes I am resentful it's us that has to do all the adjustments and changes and not DD. But maybe I am being unreasonable as I know very well how the ND teen brain works. It doesn't do logic!!

DS still at school so it has been tiring for him. I have a few quiet days off work this week. Will make the most of them.
Hope everyone has a good day.

I've had to get up early to drop dd to meet a friend 😴
I might mooch around the shops too for a while.

I don’t know what apps the sixth form uses so I don’t know what apps I can delete - so annoying!

DD is okay. She’s seeing her friends about once a week. I can tell she’s bored and would like to see them more but it’s hard for them to find places to go and they are weird about just hanging out at friends houses.

I was trying to take her away overnight but she doesn’t want to leave her cat!

@MinionKevin
I checked online and her FE college doesn't use it. I think its just cash/card payments.
Dd is out with a friend today which I'm pleased about as she often doesn't bother to arrange anything then gets bored/upset/anxious.
I'm trying to get sorted for the holiday but I'm so hot and bothered 😫

Hope everyone is doing ok?
Back from our holiday and it was lovely ☺️
Sad to be back 😞
Both dds (and dh and I) really chilled out.
We enjoyed it so much we've re booked for next year 😀
3 weeks and 6 days to gcse results day (not that I'm counting 😬)
Dd seems to be more positive about the btec and FE college.
Counselling next week.
Older dd has relaxed and been her usual lovely self. It's so nice to see her smile again. She's off to her bfs tomorrow then away with friends, then away with bf then she wants to try and see her oldest friend for the weekend too! She's making up for lost time.
I'm shattered. I'm not coping very well with the heat 😪
Dds working tomorrow and I have 3 million loads of laundry to do...ugh

@destiel00
Glad you and the family had a good holiday. Next year's holiday sorted too.. 😃
Eughh...post holiday washing is rubbish. Also getting the fridge stocked up and getting on with cooking.
Hope you have decent weather to do all of it.
We are ok...DD busy with bf. We met him briefly few days ago. Come September I hope she gets her head together about college and does some work. She isn't getting many shifts at work which she is not happy about. She has her driving test in a few weeks. That will be interesting!
Family therapy is going well. DH and I finally making joint decisions and the therapist is really helping DH see things differently.
Things with DD are still full of soap style drama but we soldier on.
Haven't booked any holiday this year which is rubbish. But to tell the truth I don't want to play happy family...but we must do something for poor DS. Maybe a long weekend will work out.
Hope everyone has a good weekend.
Xx

@DarkChocHolic
I have no idea where all the washing comes from!
Would your ds like a city break? Or a 3/4 day forest break?
It can be so hard to suit everyone
...
Glad therapy is going well x

@destiel00 glad you had a lovely holiday
@DarkChocHolic glad to hear about therapy going well

Things are alright here, dd is getting on with her work and keeping in touch with her uni friends via zoom, it gladdens my heart when I hear her giggling and connecting with like minded people. Still the odd blip but it's so seldom that normality is the norm now, which is something I would never dared had hoped for even a year ago. My older dc is better too although to be honest, I think it's more me than them. I think I'm still ultra aware of anything that might lead to mental health decline but actually I need to step back, support but not try and fix things which is even more the case for someone that is a full on adult! You'd think after all my years in the trenches, I'd be a natural at it but alas..........😂

Love to all on this thread, hoping results day brings good news and the summer holidays bring some respite, relaxation and laughter!

@Okisenough
Oh, that's SO lovely to hear 😊
Dd is ok (I think?)
She's doing some art work today.
Older back from bfs later.
I'm cleaning the kitchen (rock n roll)

@Okisenough
So glad both of yours are doing ok. It is a lovely update!
May it last forever and ever.
The PTSD for us from seeing the kids go through this horrible ordeal cannot be underestimated.
Hopefully in the not too distant future it will become less of a heartache.
Xx

@DarkChocHolic
💙