General support thread - come on in

[Kielyflower]

I couldn’t see a recent one of these so thought I’d start one.

I just feel I need to do something positive so will hopefully share some more thoughts later that I hope will help - others as well as myself.

In the meantime, feel free to check in as, if nothing else, it helps to feel less alone.

Good morning. Feeling quite anxious today. Going into the office for the first time in a while and i don't want to go. Trying to push through.

@Riley1989 sorry I must have missed that! How about talking therapy or cbt? Glad propranolol works for your physical symptoms. Keep talking on here too it helps.

@Ilovedogs1 I think were all the same today. My heart is racing and my belly is upset and my mind is going 10 to a dozen! Thursdays should be happy days its almost weekend! Can't wait for a wine tomorrow I won't lie! Hope you can have a decent day.

@JamSandle glad you replied I was panicking my last post upset you (not my intention!) As above I think were all feeling it today. Hopefully going in the office keeps your mind busy. Here for a vent if you need it.

@snowfoxglove how are you?

Good luck today @JamSandle hopefully you'll feel good for having gone in afterwards. I am teaching a couple of tutorials tomorrow after three weeks off!

Managed to cook yesterday and find a job I am keen to apply for. made it to the gym this morning. The weather is grey and rainy today but listening to music is helping. All the best to everyone today x

I'm sitting in my car about to go to work and I feel really panicky. My thoughts are saying 'how can you just go to work while your so uncertain of such important, moral things' I know it's the OCD/ anxiety but how will I ever get this thought pattern to stop?

@Greenspace81 well done you! You're making such positive steps to help yourself!

I'm trying to shift this knot in my stomach 😩 don't know what's wrong with me lately I'm still so up and down its exhausting x

@Ilovedogs1 sorry I missed your message! To answer your question I had horrendous postnatal OCD around harming my DD. It was awful I couldn’t do anything with her without my stupid brain turning it into harm OCD intrusive thoughts! I don’t have them anymore around my DD but I do have them about myself and I also get suicidal Intrusive thoughts. I worry about being alone with her because I honestly think I’m not good at being her mum (no good at anything really) and I wake up when I’m alone with her with a feeling of an impending sense of doom that something terrible is going to happen and I am not going to be able to cope with it and that she is safer if it’s not just me with her. Just as a side note you are absolutely not weird and the OCD harm intrusive thoughts are really really common in mums! My therapist at the time told me that the intrusive thoughts are basically your brains really messed up way of keeping your kids safe so when you have them to reframe them as in like “thank you intrusive thought for making sure we are being kept safe” I don’t want to trigger you but as an example one of my worst Intrusive thoughts was throwing my DD down the stairs. So when I got to the top and had the intrusive thought I thanked it for making sure that I concentrated when I walked down the stairs to keep me and DD safe. It worked for me in the end but it took a lot of time as I was having them all day everyday no matter what I was doing with DD. I do wonder now if my fear of being alone with her is actually PTSD type trauma from this time because there were days when I couldn’t bare to be in the same room as my DD and we had to move back in with my parents so she was looked after. Sorry that was so long just want to give you as much info and help as I can xxx

Good morning everyone 💚

I just wanted to say a thank you to all of you. Not just the ones who reply to my messages but I see everyone battling this horrible thing called mental health and I am inspired by you all coming together to support each other. I am glad I found this community and I will continue to be apart of it.

I am having better days, the mornings are still the hardest and I'm still under the home treatment team.

I have the horrendous decision to make about uni. I am actually a student paramedic and I love it. But I have a max of 4 weeks to return to studies or I defer and I think in my heart I know I should defer until I'm fully better (if thats such a thing!) but I'm struggling to make peace with that.

I hope you all have a lovely weekend and I hope you find some small pockets of joy and peace in your day! 🩷🩷🩷

Good morning everyone:)

My anxiety is really high today but I have things I need to do. I wish there was a switch for it!

Hi JamSandle! Sorry for the late reply. I hope you managed to have some peace in your day from the horrid anxiety, what I would do for a magic tablet! 😆😆 take care 🩷

Hey how is everyone?

@hk1993x sorry you've got the added present with uni. What does your dh think?

Mornings are definitely the worst. It's like wondering how you're going to get through the day and will you feel like this all day.... well that's the case for me most days anyway!

Weekends are a little easier, ds keeps me distracted and busy.

I'm greatful for the community on here too and glad you joined us x

Hi @Jk24 and all. That's nice to hear that your DS keeps you distracted jk. I'm fortunate to be enjoying my DCs a great deal at the moment as that hasn't always been the case and I know other mums having hard times with theirs.

My symptoms (when things are bad) are near identical to recent posts about work, OCD, anxiety in the mornings etc

It's kind of comforting to know this common experience is there as it sometimes feel like it's only me who has these crazy thoughts.

I am getting on with my life better than a couple of months or so ago, I wish I could say do x,y,z and it would be a guaranteed fix for others.

Lowering stress in general has been a big one for me.

My issue is now that I feel better I am starting to take on more things and can feel my stress levels rising again!

It does feel like it's something I need to constantly watch, but may be that's no different to other health matters.

Keep on trucking all, try to have a nice relaxing bedtime routine and sleep well. x

@Kielyflower that's great about enjoying time with your dc.

Try not to over do it, you don't want to end up back where you were but well done for trying all these new things x

@Kielyflower I understand what you mean about feeling better then doing more which means more stress. Don't know if your like me but when I think I should slow down a bit I feel quite guilty about it, like I should be able to cope.
I try to think of it like this, anxiety disorders are generally chronic, if you had a chronic physical condition like diabetes or heart disease you wouldn't feel so bad about resting. It is a exhausting battle nevertheless.

Good advice both, thank you. I think I needed that those reminders. I’m going to try to slow down a bit.

Does anyone else relate to thinking to deeply and philosophically about EVERYTHING?
I was just reading an article and there was a line that read 'how do you know that you know what you think you know' 🤯🤯
Thing is are all us anxious types looking for an answer that just isn't there?
And if we are what do we do with that?
Sometimes just feel like I'm managing to get through each day but I want that peace of mind feeling, that calmness that everything is going to be ok.
Bit of a ramble I know but trying to put how I feel into words. X

@Ilovedogs1 yep! Just had a cbt session and I told her that when I'm challenging my thoughts and trying to counter balance with a positive, I tell myself I'm lying to myself then... its a vicious cycle x

I think anxious types are often creative types and there are ways we can channel it (with practice) beyond navel gazing.

Feeling much better today. I always feel better on Sundays and Mondays.

If challenging your thoughts feels like lying, can you find a way to challenge the lie. Like what evidence do I have that my brain is lying? Why would it do that? Maybe the bad thoughts are the lies?

Just wanted to share this for the overthinkers amongst us....

@JamSandle I can see why Sundays and Mondays are good for you as the mean the beginning of your weekly routine, keeping busy and distracted. I find Saturdays and Sundays easier as ds and dh keep me busy and distracted x

Sorry just noticed its gone on unfocused :( happy to forward it by email If anyone wants me to x

I've had an old intrusive thought pop up. Probably because I'm fighting it and the anxiety is changing tack.
I'm going to sound incredibly weird but I used to worry that when I put the bin bag in the wheelie bin 'what if' I've accidentally put something in the bin like a cat or something. Now I'm worried you all think I'm really strange.
Anyway I used to be really obsessively observant about what I was putting in the bin. Then it stopped bothering me.
Well its come back to the point that I've just got the bin bag from yesterday out the wheelie bin and checked its contents. 🤢
Obviously there's nothing in there that shouldn't be. But I'm so annoyed with myself. I've been working really hard trying to not give into the compulsions. Anyway I then noticed there was another black bin bag in the wheelie bin. I feel so anxious that there might be something in it and I want to go through it but I know that's just giving into the compulsions aswell as being gross. I just want to be normal. 😢

@Ilovedogs1 go and check the other bag just so you can sleep tonight. I spoke to my therapist about this today and she said do whatever makes you feel a little better/easier even if it's reassurance seeking.

Youre no stranger than most of us on here so don't worry about being judged! This is your safe space.

I told you I went back the other week to check I'd not ran the guy at the tyre place over. If I hadn't have done that, I would still be worrying now x

@Jk24 thanks for your reply. Thing is all the OCD experts and books etc tell you not to check these things because your just fueling the OCD. If I check again then there will be something else, then something else. It just turns into a vicious cycle.