Recovering from breakdown

[EmmaEmerald]

Does anyone have any experience of this?
I thought I'd had a nervous breakdown in my 20s but carried on working. This time I'm knocked out. I got up at 8 and need a nap already!

I've been dealing with people going through Double Depression which was something new to me but i found now that it exist. It used to happen with me as well. Thank god I found a way now and helping my patients with that as well.

No offence but that seems like a very unhelpful label - the description seems to fit "depression" as I understand it anyway, having had it for decades. And the list of suggestions seems exactly the same? Would you say you do anything different in these cases?

BuggerLugs that's good that it's night time only.

Lugs, I’m pleased you’re getting somewhere. Good idea on the wedding talk. And work. Less things to clutter up your brain.

I'm all right thank you BuggerLugs

some problems are increasing but I feel better able to cope with it. Though I have had to take two Imodium today while dealing with some property stuff.

re the wedding, if you want to get married, I'd just get married. Life is hard enough without adding unnecessary stress.

I'm normally very good at saying no though, it's the sudden absence of that quality that got me into this mess tbh.

I did wonder if there was a link marriage/wedding but I didn't like to say

I kind of feel that your instinct will be more helpful than anything else but our instincts get buried under things....I need a lot of peace and quiet to get back in touch with mine.

My single status is very important to me, to the extent that even having a boyfriend was bizarre.

I tend to see marriage as a practical financial and legal arrangement

So it will vary from person to person, but for me there'd have to be a humungous financial incentive and as I an fine alone, that would be hard

If you see marriage in a more romantic light, then it's different again. And of course, children change things.

I hope you can get to the root of your feelings.

That sounds like a step forward @TheBuggerlugs but understandable that it's rocked you a bit.
I'm having a tricky couple of days after feeling a bit more confident. I'm not sure why.

@TheBuggerlugs it sounds like your psychologist knows what they are talking about

Hi allI just checked back on the thread to say hi and to ask a question

Sorry that people are going through so much

TheBuggerLugs sorry if this seems wrong to ask but are you sure that therapy, or this type, is right for you?

My question - how are people physically? I'm shocked at how tired I am. I'm now almost four weeks into new meds and expect to be on the full dose middle of next week.

It may not be related of course. I actually asked for a full set of bloods as I was wondering what's going on. I thought it might be low iron or something but turns out not to be. All is well. Which is good, I'm just a bit taken aback that two months after the breakdown, I'm still very tired.

I also find that my limbs ache, which is a side effect of vortioxetine but I thought it would have worn off. It has definitely reduced - the first few days of 10mg, I felt like I'd been lifting weights. But it's still there.

The doctor thinks that after years of stress, I will be fine but will take a while to get back to normal physically. If I'm not working, I fall asleep in the daytime and there is a rebound effect, which is bound to happen I guess. He also thinks that adrenaline and cortisol will take a while to get back to normal. Just wondered what experience others have had.

TheBuggerLugs I don't necessarily mean her, though that could be a factor

but I have a lot of doubts re therapy generally and certainly I've been concerned about some people I know who have found therapy problematic. That might be their individual therapists, I don't know. But do you think that revisiting the past etc is necessary eg childhood? Worst example I heard recently, a friend for private therapy after her mum died. The therapist decided she hadn't processed her father's death correctly....that was 30 years ago! My friend stopped going after a few of us expressed concern. Blatant money making attempt.

Another friend went because she was anorexic, there was a clear trigger for it but the therapist was convinced it was due to something from childhood.

Did that awful phrase come up earlier on this thread - "if it's hysterical, it's historical"? Another of my bugbears.

Is your therapist NHS?

Re Covid, no, I think I might have some old tests, I'll have a look. But it's not that I feel unwell. I don't feel virussy at all. i wake up all perky. More that I get to 4pm and hit a wall of fatigue. I might actually get some iron sachets. Also, I didn't take Vitamin D all summer but summer hasn't been great and I suppose I was ill for a fair chunk of it anyway, so will start my winter daily dose.

I wake up totally normal but then hit a wall in the afternoon. I need to stop working at least two hours before my normal. I work for myself and the doctor said if he could have signed me off for about three months, he'd have done that.

I'm oversensitive to caffeine so no more than one cup in the morning. That said, I'm also very oversensitive to medication! I was wondering if it's right to go up to 20mg but doctor is concerned as I get bad SAD so he feels there's a risk of relapse.

I did notice, the two days I used the Tube, I really benefitted from those bars of bright light. I hate the Tube but in winter I always notice the benefit of those lights.

I've ordered two massive bright lamps for my flat and I really struggled to assemble the first one - as if I can't lift anything at all. And it's not blooming working! Three weeks ago, all that effort for something that's likely faulty would have triggered tears, but not today, so I'm confident I'm on the mend.

I'm also grumpy I can't find anyone to go to a music thing with me next weekend - another sign I'm on the mend. But I must tackle this tiredness and joint aches. A hot bath helps the joint aches a lot. And my brain is definitely back on, which is nice!

Oh this is really first world but another background stress - I think I will struggle with stress till my other flat is sold. There’s now a problem in there that needs fixing which means another four hour round trip coordinating with a workman. Who i currently have yet to source. There’s a tube strike next week anyway so I can’t get there.

I really don’t feel up to renting it out but if the sale falls through, I will give it one more try at selling and if that fails, then I’ll have to rent it. It sounds horribly over privileged but it’s a huge source of stress and I guess a lesson in how badly I’ve handled everything on that front.

I find it hard to put stuff like that to the back of my mind.

Hey everyone. I'm continuing to feel better but also wary of this still.
Intrusive thoughts have upped there game a bit this week but its been a busy one with lots going on.
@EmmaEmerald earlier in the year when I was really ill and the psychiatrist keep increasing meds I felt like an absolute zombie. I could of quite easily have slept all day. My husband and I decided to reduce some meds ourselves and 🤞it's been about 4 weeks and I feel much better.
I had some bloods done and apparently am deficient in vit b12 so doctor has prescribed tablets for that.
The pharmacist at my local pharmacy said she's had lots of customers saying that psychiatrists just increase meds all the time which just makes them feel knackered.
Have lost faith in the psychiatrists a bit this year I'm afraid. X

I've never seen a psychiatrist but I've heard much better things about them than about therapists. Just anecdata, of course. But if you feel you're on too high a dosage, definitely tell them that. These are powerful drugs, and aren't a lot of them increasing the load on the liver? Also, diazepam makes me very very low if I have too much even just for sleep.

I had a ponder about increasing my vortiewotsit dose to the max. But I figure I can always go down. Also, the situation with my elderly mother isn't going to get better. So I want to be a top level functioning. But if 20 is too much, I'll cut back.

My experience has been that doctors were more likely to want me off medication, but I've never missed work or anything before this so maybe it's different. I once got told if I was only using 10 diazepam per year, I didn't need them at all.

Yesterday, after napping for two hours, I didn't sleep till 6am. Woke up at 10. Felt surprisingly okay, saw mum, then I walked around a lot running various errands. Didn't nap. Hopefully I can get an early night and then be back on track.

I'm also going to take a mutivitamin again, I had stopped years ago and only take B complex and magnesium. But I'm now going to take a general one too.

Just checking in. I had about 3 weeks where I felt more confident but had a set back back this week. Horrible lows and anxiety again. No obvious trigger so trying to keep as calm as possible.
for us all

TheBuggerLugs obviously I'm not a doctor, but you've said yourself you feel worse after every medication increase and you keep notes, I think? So that's something to discuss with your doctor. I am not sure what meds you are on now. Did you drive after taking the diazepam? I realise that might be fine for you but my doctor wouldn't be keen on that.

If it's any consolation, if you asked me at the end of July, I wouldn't have cared if I lived or died. I wasn't suicidal but I didn't care. Now I want to live.

Mentally, I am working my way through a lot of stuff on my own and making progress. I don't want a therapist. I'm not advocating that anyone give up on a plan prescribed by professionals, just putting it out there that's it done me good to work through stuff alone, with no external influence.

Also, have you had a full physical, blood tests etc? I've been in treatment for decades, always on the lowest doses and my doctor used to ask me to have yearly blood tests.

We gave up on that after I had a bad experience with some false results, so normally I'm reluctant to suggest it but in your case I do wonder if it's worth it. Also how much diazepam are you taking? Along with venlafaxine, could it be that in managing your anxiety, they've gone for too much and got you on high doses?