The lonely journey of anxiety - loosen the tight grip of fear. Support, friendliness thread.

[Aintgotnosoapbox]

Hello. I have been suffering with various forms of anxiety over the last year, and have had the tight grip of fear - at times all pervading and almost existential, at other times just transient and anticipatory, which has led to a lot of feelings of being closed up, strained, and losing connection with others. When this happens I get a certain type of chest sensation which feels like pure fear. Sometimes, I am tired and can't tolerate it. Other times, I feel free and in control of it .
My antidote to all of this is connection, mindfulness, self care and various other techniques I have learned along the journey.
What I have also learned is that anxiety states are very lonely fearful places to be so I would really welcome anyone , whether well emotionally, psychologically, mentally, or unwell emotionally, psychologically or mentally, to come onto the thread when they can with a hello, a message or a moan about their day, and maybe we will feel better and get better together.
I was given a lovely compliment today, that I have very good social skills, and make others feel better and empathise. I'm not perfect, in fact have had the most tremendous struggle recently, but am starting to feel alive again.
Come and join me in a path to wellness and connection. Life is short, let's beat this anxiety together.

I think I would like to join, sorry to hear others are struggling. I am in a difficult place too. I realise I am very good at self-sabotage and I seem to do it in all areas of life, I am a perfectionist and I just want to hide away when I perceive things don't go right. I am currently very isolated at home, just taking kids to school, looking after them, I have lost interest in anything else. I have just started medication. I can't imagine my life ever lifting out of this place. I have made a right mess and can't see how I will ever work again which is the last sort of example I wanted to set for my kids.

Having a brighter day today despite being kept awake by DH snoring and farting - I got my sense of humour back at least.
Managed breakfast, too and no Valium today . I needed less than 12 hours help to be honest and you can't drive (I am in a village) so it isolates me. DH has been great.

User, your symptoms sound like mine.

Have a good day all, mutual hugs xx

Hi all, I hope it's okay to join.

I appear to have had a relapse with anxiety and depression, after 3 years. Tonight I will be starting sertraline and I am struggling not to feel a failure. I have many ways of dealing with anxiety, breathing exercises, hypnosis, thought journal, gratitude journal, testing my thoughts for evidence to show myself they are lies but the low mood prevails and my muscles are sore which tells me I'm still a bundle of anxious, regardless.

I'm scared of start up effects. Even though I've been on sertraline before, I'm just so very tired. For the last 10 days, I've forced myself out of bed, into work and back home to look after my four children and I'm exhausted with all the adrenaline. I'm on my own too so no partner to lean on should then start up be bad. I don't want my mental health to affect my children or my work, so I'm going to do it but I want to cry. I hope everyone is doing okay tonight x

Sorry to hear there are a few of us struggling at the moment. My mood and anxiety have lifted even more today. Maybe my anxiety is r

I don't know what happened there?!

I was going to put, maybe my anxiety is related to my menstrual cycle?

Place marking...my nickname says it all.

After a day of panic attacks one on top of the other for hours on end, I'm taking myself to bed to pass out. I'll read this thread and reply properly in the morning

Evening all, how is everyone doing today? I've been at my mums with the kids. Hasn't been a great day, stomach pain and heartburn giving me anxiety and tearful. I was supposed to start the sertraline last night but I just couldn't do it. I keep telling myself it's because I don't know what's wrong with me but I know that ultimately, whether my test results show a bug or not, now I've experienced anxiety again, it's probably not going to disappear anytime soon. So I'm back to trying to get over my fears enough to take the AD's.

After a good day yesterday, not a great day today. Made the mistake of reading somethings which prompted the grip of my fears to resurface. Palpitations, sweating ect. I am supposed to be working tomorrow but I am resigned to taking time off.

Realising that I am going to have to come clean to family and friends about what is happening to me.

Hope you are all feeling ok xx

I had a good day yesterday, I'm hoping for the same today.
Taxi it does sound as though you might benefit from taking some time off work. Do you have occupational health at your workplace who might be able to help at all?
only I've never taken AD's so I don't know the complications from taking them, but I'm assuming they can cause stomach troubles by what you have written? If it is to do with that, I can empathise, it must be really difficult for you to muster the courage to take them when initially that can make the situation worse.

I've some underlying anxiety today and I'm torturing myself by looking on the relationship boards. Why on earth am I doing that?
How can i/we just stop thinking what we think? From the relationship book I read it does say that if you have depression Etc., then the feelings of 'non love' are in a way normal in that situation, but not normal in everyday life, so it should be ignored to a certain degree. What happens if I come out of this and I realise it is all over for us? DH has been my constant for nearly 26 years and we have lived together for 18 years. I really can't imagine life without him, not that i don't think I'll be able to cope, i kniw i will, but I'm me because of him, and he is a good man, kind, generous and caring to both me and DD. The book also said as a society are just not content with the companionship and we need the constant flush of love feelings.
Can you just fall out if love with no apparent reason?
I don't want this to be happening, I want my happy life back, the one where I didn't question my relationship.
We were out by ourselves again last night and we were just happily chatting but I had that constant wariness hanging on my shoulder where I just wasn't enjoying the moment, and i was kind if checking in on myselfvand my feelings. How do I stop doing this?
I feel teary again to get the worry out.

Aintgotnosoapbox should have a soapbox.
How very generous of you to use your anxieties to help others. You must be a very special person and I'm sure your new boss will see this. Best of luck.

Thank you teas - kind words from you :)
I feel bad as I started this thread and then went through a dip into ' the fear' after therapy and haven't been able to post as much as I initially intended, but I think on this board we are understanding that people may be having a bad day/s.
People are so brave, and anxiety is such hard work.
Today I am off work, and taking chance to cook for my son, be in the garden and try to slow down.
I find mindfulness really helpful, I might go outside to do 10 minutes practice in the garden.
Hope everyone on the thread is settled, and can take steps to look after themselves.
I have a tip which I have been taught and use when anxious : if you feel quite acutely anxious one trick to try is counting with the senses which is a type of grounding technique :
Breathe quite deeply but gently, in through the mouth and out through the nose and
Count five things you can see outside.
Count four things you can see inside.
Count three things you can hear
Count two things you can feel ( feet on floor etc)
Count one thing you can smell
I find it works for me , at least to bring the level of anxiety down.
Have a good afternoon, all :)

Hello all. Thank you for starting this thread op.

I'm very much 'in the eye do the srorm' at the minute. Feeling very anxious and over whelmed. I went out on Saturday night and had more to drink than I normally would and it has triggered it. I just don't seem to be able to shake that feeling of panic.

I had problems with anxiety for many years but I really thought I had turned a corner as I haven't had any anxiety for several years. Then in the last 6 months the feelings have all started to creep back. After having suffered so long with them followed by several years without them I'm now absolutely dreading them being back to stay.

taxiforme I had to leave a job due to my anxiety when I was younger. To be honest I didn't know what was wrong at the time, I just got to a point where I was hyperventilating, feeling like I was going to faint on work mornings. Work were very understanding but in the end I resigned. I didn't work for about a year (was supported by dp)which made the anxiety worse because I used to panic about people asking me why I didn't work.

nota for a long time a drink would help with my social anxiety . I suppose it is for a lot of people. However drinking too much is dreadful for me. I imagine things I might have done or said even if I know I didn't. That's how I feel today. I've given up in the past but I do enjoy it and hate feeling like my anxiety has 'won' and I can't even have a drink with a meal out if that makes any sense at all.

Does anyone else have feelings of anxiety about their children? I'm very cautious (?) with my dc, I have irrational fears about them falling off bridges or out of windows. Not so bad that I can't function but enough that I wish they would go away. I'm not certain anymore about how much worry is 'normal' .

Hi all ... I'm on anxiety tabs.. they do help a lot.. but if someone says the wrong thing to me my eyes water up .. and I just feel like walking away from the situation but as I'm at work I don't think it would go down well ... I'm not too good in social situations or meeting new people .. I just want to be normal .. I over think too much and a people pleaser .. I always think the things I do are not good enough .. family control me .. if I'm not home at a certain time I always wonder what response I'm going to get .. I've tried councilling but it's not helped ..

What are anxiety tabs Mother?

Tablets

Back in the eye of the storm again.
Overthinking panicking catastrophising about a trigger event at work.

Didn't help by having a good friend round who is also a work colleague (work is where my issues are) and issues raised which as above, sent me over the edge.

Poor DH, another sleepless night. Back on the Valium.

Signed off for 4 weeks.

Sorry to hear all your troubles- hope everyone is feeling better today xxx

taxi sorry to hear it's got a grip if you again today. You do sound as though you need the time off from work.
Overall, i had a sad day yesterday, with an underlying anxiety. I had another short talk with DH after DD had gone to bed. I woke this morning and I'm doing ok today. I've even had positive thoughts and feelings about DH, so I'm going to try and focus on those to overcome any fear or worries that might crop up.
I hope everyone gets through the day as best they can.

I had quite an anxious day yesterday. I went to my parents' house with my two children, we had a nice day and a play in the garden but my mind was racing a bit and I felt pretty anxious. It was my DD's birthday yesterday as well, she is 3 now. She had a good day which was the main thing.

I've decided to stop taking my aripiprazole cos I think it's making me more anxious. So I didn't take it this morning. I feel quite relaxed just now, although I have some anxieties over a day trip we will be making next week. Filled with dread a little bit if I'm honest.

I hope everyone is ok.

I had a good day yesterday. I had a few bubbling anxious sensations this morning, but I've put them to bed at the moment. I'm just telling myself they are not true thoughts or feelings and I'm focussing on the 'mental filter' explanation from Moodgym which is 'one (negative) part of the picture is examined to the exclusion of the larger (positive) parts'
Another quote from the anxiety book I read is 'mist anxious thoughts are actually assumptions or exaggerated reactions to situations.'
I hoping and will try to maintain control of my thoughts today.

Would people recommend Moodgym - to the extent that it is worth paying for it? I tried beating the blues and it didn't help at all.

I've found Moodgym helpful to certain degree and I currently get it free because I was a free user prior to them charging a fee.
I have learnt some lessons from it, but I think it's more focussed towards building self esteem by the examples it uses rather than focussing on general anxiety and anxious thoughts. It does however have questionnaires which measure your level of depression and anxiety. There is also a questionnaire which highlights your main triggers, mine being the need to succeed and the need of approval. Although it isn't clear to me how these relate to my current anxiety.
Out if interest how much is it?

Hi everyone. I'm struggling today after a better day yesterday. I'm still focussing on when i went out on Saturday. I'm imagining things that just couldn't have happened or are really unlikely to have happened and getting very stressed about it. I've spoken to my friend who I was with who assured me that I'm imagining it but I can't stop thinking about it. Does this sound familiar to anyone?

I'm also struggling with the fact that this level of anxiety is back after so long.

Yes, Battle. That's me. I was convinced I would go to prison the other day (for a perceived mistake I had made at work). Completely irrational but sadly a reflection of the terrible stresses, blame culture and micromanaging in my job.

I am also in a situation where I can't read or watch the news at the moment.

I am waiting for a knock at the door. Some terrible repercussion. I know that it isn't going to happen in my rational mind. I have even played out worse case scenario for what happened on Saturday and rationally know that even my worse case scenario isn't worth this level of stress.

I can relate to your work situation taxi. Just before I left my job (this was many years ago) I became convinced that I was personally responsible for something terrible. Something terrible that didn't happen and I was not responsible for anyway. It was an absolutely awful time. You have so much of my sympathy.