Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Original poster

Help! Breakdown, homelessness teen daughter.

298 replies

Vstressedtenant · 13/04/2017 19:15

I am experiencing another breakdown. I have called crisis team and they are seeing me tomorrow can't see me earlier.

I'm scared. I may be going into hospital which I haven't before. I don't know what this entails.

My daughter has nowhere to go she is 16. We are a tight unit and have been let down by almost everyone else. Her father hasn't seen her in 5 years. But I suspect that's what everyone will tell us to do. He lives hundreds of miles away so it would mean her leaving school and friends and all she knows and me and I am scared he will turn her against me and I'll never see her again, never have the relationship with her I have now which frankly is the only good thing in my life.

She is an amazing person and doesn't deserve to have to deal with any of this.

I can't stop crying, shaking, can barely breathe.

Can anyone tell me what hospital is like (for mh reasons) what would I be allowed to take in/not allowed as I cannot be without my phone as I cannot be out of touch with my girl.

Can anyone please advise or help? I'm drowning here

OP posts:
Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 20/04/2017 18:11

Ok I'll take that advice then. Thanks.

You're right it shouldn't be like that. It's not fair. I hate making phone calls I hate feeling like I'm being a nuisance.

OP posts:
CotswoldStrife · 20/04/2017 19:04

Are you still in the hotel at the moment, what has happened to all your stuff - is it with you or still back at the house?

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 20/04/2017 20:14

Still in hotel. Stuff at a relatives we don't have much anyway.

OP posts:
BlackDoglet · 20/04/2017 23:42

How is your daughter coping?

Would it be possible for you to return home with some support?

Hope things are sorted soon.

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 21/04/2017 00:18

Daughter much calmer than when we were in flat. She is very supportive.

Not possible to return home even with support. Plus tenancy has now been ended.

OP posts:
NolongerAnxiousCarer · 21/04/2017 08:52

Hope it goes well with CPN today Flowers

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 21/04/2017 11:39

Thank you.

Went ok seems nice enough but also professional and determined. But a little less pushy on my behalf than I'd have liked but that may have been just to not get my hopes up.

OP posts:
Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 21/04/2017 15:44

Well, we now have a temporary place to stay. So that's a little of the pressure off.

OP posts:
NolongerAnxiousCarer · 21/04/2017 16:46

Fantastic news. Well done for getting through last weekFlowers

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 21/04/2017 16:55

Still not totally relaxed but getting there. Dd and I are gonna chill and watch a film tonight. I won't completely relax until we have somewhere permanent sorted but it feels like things are moving now. Got meetings with various people next week which will hopefully help too.

OP posts:
Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 23/04/2017 20:51

Quick update. In current flat for now. No heating or hot water as we can't figure it out/not working.

Also no wifi and ltd data so can't post/check constantly.

But we have a kettle and throws and it's only for one night so hopefully we'll look back in the future and be able to see it as just one of those things we had to go through.

Thanks again so much for all the support. I am extremely grateful.

OP posts:
NolongerAnxiousCarer · 23/04/2017 21:22

No problem, the heating didn't work in DHs temporary flat either and the kitchen window wouldn't close. It was December. But the main thing is you have somewhere safe whilst they get something more perminant sorted.

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 23/04/2017 22:52

Yes we are safe for now. Dd has gone to bed but I don't think she is asleep. I am fretting about tomorrow and money. Calculators telling me I could be up to £400 worse off! who can cope with £400 knocked off their income in one fell swoop?

I know I know tomorrow's problem.

Tonight's problem is no tv, no music, low data, no wifi.

OP posts:
NolongerAnxiousCarer · 24/04/2017 11:53

Hope it goes well today. They will be able to advise you. There might be things you don't know about that will go in your favour

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 24/04/2017 13:27

Possibly. I've had that happen before. Also I don't fill forms in correctly I forget a lot of things (partly nerves/condition, partly meds make me forgetful). Which then makes it look as if things aren't 'that bad' for me.

OP posts:
Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 26/04/2017 12:55

@NolongerAnxiousCarer I'd really appreciate if I could pm you again later I have some questions? You've been so helpful.

Welfare advisor didn't call and we had other stuff going on. Hoped for call yesterday but none so I called today. Calling me back later.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 26/04/2017 13:02

Hope they call you back soon.

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 26/04/2017 13:05

Thanks been told later this afternoon but always have phone on me. It just would be easier to be somewhere quiet I can concentrate. Heading to dds first ever visit to a laundrette! She seems bemused.

OP posts:
NolongerAnxiousCarer · 28/04/2017 19:23

Hi, sorry I've not been arround this week, have PMed you. Hope you are ok

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 28/04/2017 20:13

Received and replied to. Thanks for thinking of us.

OP posts:
Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 11/05/2017 14:30

Quick and happy update.

We have a new home! Smile

SO much has happened. I applied for local social housing, honestly wasn't expecting to get anywhere for ages but have been VERY lucky that they had on their books a flat that other people didn't want. Partly as supposedly a 'bad area' but I know it and know people that stay there and it's really not as bad as its reputation. Also it's 3rd floor so lots of stairs so a lot of people couldn't manage that. We can (at least for now), funnily enough dd and I both have to do stair exercises for physio! Decent size but not too big. Kitchen and bathroom are completely separate from other rooms (which helps a lot!)

Got keys yesterday but nothing to put in flat yet.

Guy from homeless team who is meant to have done me an application for homelessness etc finally phoned back and we made an appointment to meet but now don't need appointment and STILL can't get hold of him.

Never heard from homeless offices welfare person either (new landlords are putting me in touch with someone).

Cpn is an absolute cracker. Nice and friendly but also no nonsense straight talker! Just what I need! Seen her a few times now, she's got things moving on that side for me, is setting up a getting & staying we'll plan for me which includes mum & dd.

Have also been able to get support & help for dd. She is much happier and calmer and aside from the usual teen hormonal nonsense she's quickly becoming the girl I know again.

Thank you all so so much for your support, advice and encouragement.

It's not over this is just the start. It's going to be hard work I know and there's lots to organise but we'll get there.

OP posts:
NolongerAnxiousCarer · 14/05/2017 22:04

What a lovely update V so glad things are working out well for you and you and DD are getting back on track x

Original poster
Vstressedtenant · 15/05/2017 02:11

Oh I'm so glad to know you've seen it. Things going in right direction definitely. Thank you Flowers

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page