"Summer is Coming, the Village is warm and safe - support for depression, anxiety and other MH issues"

[LollipopViolet]

New thread, everyone :) First attempt at a thread title for us.

I've just posted on the old one, am really struggling today. Was feeling numb, still do, to be honest. Need to get myself through today.

I phoned council tax and they have sorted it. I don't need to go to court. Just apply online. Also phoned loan company. Turns out the balance will be paid off next week, and I was only a week behind. But I've spent twenty minutes sobbing and am still not dressed. Doctor's tommorow for a fit note, I should think. If even this gets to me. I didn't sleep well- even with zoplicone- ended up sleeping in DD's bed in the end.

Well done on the AA, Something

Setting targets is a good plan, katkins. Well done on getting the council tax and loan sorted out, it can be so hard to phone when you're feeling tearful. Maybe tell the doctor that the zopiclone isn't working?

Hi all,

Haven't been able to keep up with the thread yet again the past few weeks partly due to having no motivation to do anything and partly feeling really sad (that maybe to do with following the news too closely re the killing of children in Gaza - sorry don't want to trigger anyone else) I feel all humanity has gone from the world.... I've had to stop following the news for my own sake which in a way seems like I'm being selfish & ignoring the crisis. So it makes me question myself as not being any different from those committing these atrocities - I feel helpless :( :( :(

Group therapy has been going good but this week we speaks about abuse and now all those stupid fckd up memories have returned & I can't cope with them. Im
Having flashbacks :(

There is sooooo much crap going through my head & I can't seem to concentrate on anything. It's the summer holidays now too so DD is home now for 6 weeks!!! I really don't know how I'm going to cope. On top of it all we have a family wedding coming up in a few weeks & I feel fat & frumpy (wanted to start low calorie diet even ordered the sachets but thanks to being so all over the place never started).

I feel like very time I take a step forward I go 10 steps back :(

katkins crying is a good way to let your emotions out so don't feel bad about that. Zopiclone really works for me for sleep but everyone is different so you just need to find the one that works for you.

something well done re AA meeting. You have taken the first step now which is the hardest. Keep your motivation up and keep attending. You can do this.

snowy assessment are always depressing but you have hit through it so well done. Day hospital will be a good change for you hopefully just take each day as it comes. Hope your doing on today.

Hugs to all ciq lem Nana silvery pyrrh collardrove nethuns victrix and anyone else I'm forgetting xxx

Hi pulledapart, good to hear from you. I'm sorry you're struggling I avoid watching the news because it does get you down. I'm sorry you're having flashbacks, they can be so debilitating. Transport turned up yesterday and today, even though I wasn't supposed to go in.

I'll see my CPN tomorrow as well, not looking forward to it.

afternoon everyone.....just a quickie from me. feeling knackered but dd is dragging me out for the afternoon....just to a country park type thing. i didnt sleep well last night....never do when trying to turn my body clock around off nights...

tomorrow im taking her to a wildlife park.

my plan for today is busy busy busy - keep my mind off drinking.tonight i have the ratties to clean out and a run to squeeze in....by then i should be well and truly knackered enough to sleep tonight. im drinking my bodyweight in diet coke but hey....

hugs to all - if i try and namecheck i will forget someone....
and
we're gonna need a new thread....

Thanks snowy I've stopped watching the news it wasn't doing me any good at all. That sounds very typical of transport! Is this your new cpn your seeing tomorrow? It can take some time getting used to a change in cpn especially when you have had them for a while.

something keeping busy sounds like a good plan. Have fun at the park today :)

I hope the country park is enjoyable despite tiredness, something - I don't know how people who work shifts do it.

My CPN suggested not watching the news/thrillers etc.

It isn't a new CPN, but it's hard to see her when I'm like this, she gets frustrated.

I don't want to go to the day hospital tomorrow, but I suppose people will say I should

Pulled apart- I don't watch the news, for very similar reasons. But it gets very tiring trying to avoid it all, dosen't it?

((Snowy))- they sound as they are messing about- I know how much worse that can make stuff. It's just..well. ten times harder.

I've managed to do a fair bit today, but very, very tired and emotional. I keep focusing on things that were said to me at University. Nana- I was really bullied, and some of it was quite a trigger. I'm still in a lot of physcial pain- my arms especially- and I can't understand why. It's so frustrating. I get very strong urges to self harm, too. I think I am returning to some of a better level of functioning, though, pherhaps. I don't know. I haven't taken my anti-physcotics because it's pnr, and I felt a bit like a drugseeker because the consultant was so reluctant. That might have something to do with it all.

good luck with the CPN snowy i have also been avoiding the news/papers etc.

katkins - i might have missed your answer but earlier upthread i had asked whether you have ever been tested for fybromyalgia (sp??) or chronc fatigue syndrome? the pain doesnt sound normal.

im back from an afternoon out....am trying to rustle up some motivation to go and run.....eugh....

Something, I haven't. But it started at the beginning of ny depression and physcotic episode. It's very hard to manage sometimes. I am suddenly overwhelmed today, have been crying in between doing stuff and in the end, took my anti physcotics because they are prescribed as needed. I feel like I can't take much more though, just of this, the whole thing.

Thanks something Isn't it hot for running?

Don't skimp on the prn katkins, it's there to be taken and should help (and should continue to work, unlike diazepam).

Hi all. There's a nice breeze now, pity it'll get hot later. I'm just waiting outside for transport. Not sure I want to go but I ought to.

I hope everyone has a good day.

Hi everyone. I hope that you're all feeling rested and positive.

I just wanted to say thank you for the support and understanding I've gotten here. I think the antidepressants have kicked in at last.
I feel ok again, not leaping from the rafters but ok. Hopeful even. But no longer bummed out or flat.

I've started doing small things. I cooked last night - I love cooking and I haven't felt like doing it for about a month. But I got the pans out and made a curry. I did some light tidying and household stuff this morning without feeling overwhelmed by the crapness of it. Small things but a big deal for me

DS2 is napping, I'm having a cup of peppermint tea and watching black books. Today feels like the day things started feeling ok again.

That's so good to hear, enormouse I like black books too, maybe that's something I could watch this afternoon (maybe the heatwave episode where Manny has Dave's syndrome).

Transport were 3/4 of an hour late, I'm back home now. I have a phone number to ring over the weekend if I need

How is everyone?

Hi everyone :) hope everyone is ticking along ok and having an ok day?

Myself I appear to have turned a small corner in this past week. I admit to feeling almost quietly happy... All to do with handing in my notice at work last week I suspect.

I have not experienced any anxiety this week, for the first time in nearly 3 years I think, since all problems at work started. I certainly feel more relaxed with whatever is happening around me. My aim has been wanting to get to the 'I don't give a shit' stage!! Well for 8 days now I haven't!

Could it of really been as easy to see a change in me with just leaving my job? I will add this is a job I have loved for 5 years despite all the problems, and giving it up was always a no in the hope the evil woman who has caused all the problems who herself leave, then I would be happy again.
A part of me also has never wanted to give her the satisfaction of handing in my notice, but now I don't even care about that.

I am now starting to wonder how my job prospects with a new employer will be. I have had 2 x 1 month off sick this year. Do I have to mention this?... Has anyone else had similar in the past and gone for a new job?

Am I peaking to soon with this new found positivity? I don't know? DH has said it's been like living with a different person.

Enormouse - glad to read since chatting with you on the thread a few days ago that you are feeling better :)

Snowy - :) did you enjoy being there today? What did you do? I am sat in the shade enjoying the breeze. I nearly boiled alive walking home from work today - too much all thus heat :( - roll on Autumn!!

(((Hugs))) for you all on this thread esp CIQ, NanaNina, Pyrrh, PulledApart, Silvery, KatKins, Victrix, Lem, Nethuns, Lollipop. :) I think that is most of you!

everyone.

I'm far too hot.

That's all really good to hear, Collardove
I did some pottery today, and they want people to visit me over the weekend, I tried to say no thanks but got asked what is sensible to do

How can you cool down, Victrix? Have you got a fan?

Just checking in - busy with summer holidays - doing ok. We went to harry potter world with DD yesterday.

Ooh, how was it LEM?

It was great snowy - but so so expensive! i am trying not to think about how much we spent

Lem - did you buy dd a wand? If so whose did you get? We went at the beginning of January and it was an great day out.

I bought Voldemorts wand.... it suited my mood at that time! :-P

Collar - my dp wanted voldemorts wand but dd wanted harry's (predictable! ) we bought a hedgwig puppet too and a dvd

That sounds great, Lem. How was the hospital, snowy? I saw DD for a bit today, and she's been to loads of places (including a visit to Scotland and The National Potrait Gallery which she had lots to tell me about). I have an outpatient appoiment next Thursday, social worker assesment on Wednesday. Home treatment have said that they are going to discharge me, and told the social worker it's alright for DD to come baxk. But it depends on the social worker's assesment.

I'm still very fragile, tired and still lots of muscle pain, voices sometimes and quite tearful. My GP said get it checked out at the clinic, and if it's not a meds side effect, then come back and get full bloods done. He's also signed me off for 6 weeks under 'treatment for a physcotic episode'.

It was okish katkins, I'm still unsure I should be going. That's nice that DD has been doing lots, it must have been good to see her I hope you get the SW assessment soon.

I'm sorry you're still feeling so rough, I hope the clinic sort it out. I'm glad the GP signed you off too, that must be a relief that you can have time to get better.

Lem - oh I love Hedwig :) Glad you all had a very good time! I am glad I am not the only one who wanted to buy the dark lord's wand!

When I picked it there were many young children around watching me in horror! Of course they all wanted and picked up a box containing Harry's wand! Shame on me!!! :D