Insomnia friends - I will sleep well tonight because I have told my unconscious I will- Part II

[madmouse]

Help we left it too late the old thread is full!!! Hope we all find this one!!!

Getdown you don't sound ok?

Still bleeding and this morning there were clots What's going on with me?

Maybe despite all that happened when you miscarried you still had some lining left or more likely your hormone levels were a bit high and you produced too much lining this month. If you are worried go see your GP. Are you in pain? Big hug xxx

Must be so confusing for you Get down . Maybe go and see Gp tomorrow if still heavy. Hope you have better night x

How are you feeling now becky? Hope you've not struggled too much today.

One thing I have noticed since TTC is that I have a new obsession! And sleep suddenly doesn't seem to feature so prominently in my thinking! Even after a bad night, I kind of don't really think about it, even though by the end of the day I usually feel terrible and have a headache. It does seem to help, not dwelling on it all the time. But I know that is much easier said than done. Just wondering becky if you could really get into something new that would take up much of your thoughts e.g. a new hobby or something? I don't know tell me to shut up if you like!!!

Hi kizzie how are you feeling today?

Thanks madmouse - I hope it was perhaps just a thicker lining this month and not anything "left behind". I don't think there could have been anything left behind from the MC as I had a "normal" cycle this month in that I appear to have ov'd, so just hoping it's nothing and the bleeding will go away soon.

GetDown please don't worry too much - I had the same the first period after my MC. I think it is just bits of lining, not left behind as such, just that the lining is thicker than normal for a while :( Big hug.

Perhaps I should suggest to DH we do go for number four so that I have a new hobby!!! I'm sure he won't go for that.

Sorry for assuming you and madmouse would tell me off. I was being a bit cheeky - it's just that I need telling off and I rely on you both to do it

I'm not feeling too bad. I must have had more sleep than I thought maybe. I feel tired, but not horrendous.

"I'm not feeling too bad. I must have had more sleep than I thought maybe. I feel tired, but not horrendous." that sounds like a PST to me Good girl!

Going for number 4 would definitely take your mind off sleep!! Seriously though, have you mentioned it to DH? Would he be ?

What happened about the possible Amsterdam job? anything come of it? That could be your new hobby - researching Amsterdam and exciting places to live!!

Thanks re. the horrible bleeding thing. Sorry this is a bit off-topic for this thread. I didn't realise the lining could be thicker for a while after MC. Had assumed it would all kind of come out after the MC. 7 days of red bleeding! Euch! Not had that before!! Am hoping it will all settle down now I've got through a whole cycle post MC.

Thanks for asking how im doing. this morning was very difficult. Struggled in a meeting I was running to concentrate and felt very weepy - but from about 4pm things felt a bit easier. Going to try and have a real rest at the weekend x

DH and I joke about it all the time, and it came up when I burst into absolute floods when he said he had an appointment to discuss the snip. He says that he would need 'quite a lot of persuading' and I said that I am actually 99% sure I don't want another, it's just that teeny, tiny 1% that is there. So I'm going back on the pill (will that help with my hormone madness I wonder??) for a while.

I don't think DH has heard about the A'dam job yet. He won't get it, he says. I can't really see us upping sticks and moving. His parents would be devastated for a start (they only two years ago moved up here to be near us).

Your body will settle down now, I am sure. Mine certainly did but I distinctly remember the first period after being very heavy and long (mine usually last 2 1/2 days which I think is quite short).

Kizzie I hope you are ok. The run up to Christmas is very hard for all of us, might that have effected you recently? I definitely feel worse than I usually do and my sleep has had a bit of a blip (although last night sleep well). Christmas is such a double wammy - in one respect it is lovely, esp when you have children, but in another it is just so horrendously stressful. My mum hated Christmas with a passion when we were growing up and I never understood her. Now I kind of get where she was coming from.

becky - 99% certain you don?t want another is a pretty high percentage! I think it?s natural to go through that stage of thinking ?I won?t have any more babies? and to feel quite sad about it. But just because it feels sad, doesn?t mean you really do want another. It?s probably just a normal reaction that you have to go through. Think of the nightmare you?ve been through this past year?. Do you really want to go through all that again? (I know I myself am about to possibly put myself through that nightmare again, but the desire for #2 is so strong!) And you?d probably have to get a bigger car, and think of the university fees!!! Eeek!

Glad that you slept better last night. I did too. I woke up early again (about 4 ish) but then managed to get off to sleep again and didn?t wake up till 7:10! We didn?t get our usual early wake up call from DD ? she slept through till 7:30 which is very unusual! I like to horrify my friends that don?t yet have children by saying that 7am wake up is now like a lie-in!

Where?s arcadia these days? How are you doing arcadia how?s work going? I hope that you?ve been quiet because the sleep is all going well!

Thanks Becky.

One of my colleagues wife persuaded him to have number 3 - she had twins! So number 3 ended up being number 3 and 4.....

DS2's nursery teacher told me today about her ex-brother-in-law's wife (work that one out!) who had five boys and then finally had a girl. DH would divorce me if I proposed going to those lengths I am sure!

Ah well, who knows? Some woman is coming around to get my 6-12 month baby clothes which DH put on freecycle. I hate her already, cow bag!

Oh becky the baby clothes !!!

bit harsh to call her a cow bag though!!!

Hi am lurking here! Still keep up with this thread though don't have much time to write.

We're having a bit of a nightmare here with DP and DD both really ill. They packed off to London yesterday to stay with in-laws and I've stayed here as I had work today. I'm joining them tomorrow morning.

DD's cough is so horrendous that she is sometimes sick in the night. It has gone on for months and particularly bad the last few weeks, and she wakes at least every couple of hours through the night and you have to settle her. It is like having a newborn again but almost worse as there are no long stretches of sleep and no end in sight!

As well as worrying about her am very worried about DP. He has lost a stone in weight since she was born and from having never been ill since I've been with him he has been ill four times in the last two months, twice needing a week off work. I feel like us having a baby has destroyed him.

Work is completely hectic but today after over a year of stressing about it I confronted my boss about being paid less than my colleagues of the same qualification. He said he had no idea and would sort it out with the office manager (who does payroll). I don't believe he didn't realise, but he clearly said no reason I shouldn't be paid the same as the others. I also argued for some admin support. Go me!

Going for a wine soon with my friend to enjoy my night of freedom. Feel guilty but it's good to have a break from them (DP & DD).

Sleep not that great since worry of DD's illness and her coughing in night. Less bothered by it when i don't sleep though.

There aren't going to be any more babies around here! Good luck with TTC though getdown, and Becky stop it! get another cat instead!

Sorry to hear you're having a down spell kizzie but as others have said this is the hardest time of year to get through. I keep telling myself in three months time it will be spring! In three weeks time it will start getting lighter again in the evenings!

Please may I join you? My PTSD relapse is messing my sleep, but so are other things (GP wrote to my uni describing my MH, and they are suspending me, which puts my accommodation at risk).

Hey snowmash welcome

Not long back from counselling (PTSD here too!! Though getting there) so will post more later.

Last counselling session next week - Im ready but eeeeek.

Children. Who'd have 'em eh? Last night DS2 woke needing medicine and water at midnght - then he was frightened so I 'slept' if that's the right word in his bed from midnight until 5.30am to keep him company. Meanwhile DS3 moaned for one hour and a half and only settled after about 4 cuddles from DH and 2 from me at about 2am. Sigh. Blaaaaa. Ah well. Strangely I don't feel too down about it all. DH is not happy today though. Men don't do tired!

Hello snowmash you are very welcome here :)

Oh dear sorry to hear about your bad night becky.

Hi snowmash do you want to say a bit more about your situation? Hope you are ok

Hi all

Becky sorry for you awful night - all I can say is that the cause is external IYSWIM, not your inability to sleep. And tonight must be better!

Hi to everyone else - how is the sleeping and life in general?

I'm struggling a bit - slowly admitting to myself that finishing counselling, even though in my own timing, is very daunting. Had a late night fb conversation with my friend in which I was making lots of jokes to tell myself that I was ok and as a result came across in this weird wired way that thankfully he knows by now. Wide awake and stressed at 5.30

Had a nice time today though despite it - first when I received a huge MN Secret Santa box full of gifts, and then when i got together with a friend to do our present wrapping together while talking.

I'm so tired now and still not totally well. And I was going to do some housework as things are starting to look messy...

Hi madmouse well done for having a good time today even after your difficult night.

I saw my CPN today and......... she discharged me!

Getdown

well done sweetheart - talking about being an inspiration!

thanks!

I feel like a "normal" person again! (although not yet discharged from CMHT, but discharged from home visits by CPN)

Congratulations Getdown !

Sounds like you got lots done today, madmouse despite the night...some people would have folded before that.

arcadia, well done on the assertiveness, and I hope your DD and DP get better soon.

Becky, I hope tonight goes better.

Getdown, thanks for asking. :) I had two years of term-time only counselling/psych input for childhood issues in my early 20s. I thought that was the end of it and had been told PTSD symptomology...went off to uni fine and did my first degree/training fine.

Been classed as homeless for 13 years, but lived in tied accommodation - current tied accommodation is so bad the council have put me in the same category as priority homeless (but few properties as I'm disabled, which is why I can't get a private let).

Landlord and part of my uni have been harassing/inappropriate for 14 months, affecting work part of uni. This has resulted in strong sudden emotions/flashbacks returning, v low self-esteem, feeling v sad, and not sleeping plus sleeping at night because I don't want to be awake. Work part are suspending me because of this and accommodation (GP and a neuropsych who doesn't do MH felt this needed to happen), worried for when accommodation part find out.

I will see a psychiatrist in a couple of weeks (only way of it happening quicker was getting admitted), and I think GP is keen that psych sorts out medication of some kind for me. I'm not sure how I feel about meds - some have caused bad reactions in the past (tried zopiclone, SSRIs, venlafaxine - ended up with melatonin being the only 'safe' thing as I take large doses of benzos, and have for a decade). I hope I can ask about talking therapy, which although it hurt last time, helped in the end.

GP also said I would see a CPN when I see psych (not sure about that either).

Oh GetDown that is amazing news - brilliant! You are truly an inspiration to us all - you've helped me sooooo much.

Arcadia wow!!!! Go you!!!!

Madmouse you too are an inspiration and you're doing so well in my opinion, you're a fighter.