#makeithappen TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided. All welcome. Thread 10

[kwick]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!

Here is the link to the previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2944496--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-All-welcome-Thread-9
And the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2908645--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-All-welcome-Thread-8
And the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2886793--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-All-welcome-Thread-7
And the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2863056--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-Thread-6
Here is the link to the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2832207--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2769549-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen-loadsofBFPs
Here is the link to the thread before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2688511-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2587046-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
And the one before that!: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1877198-Donor-IUI

We also have a weight loss spin off thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2889818-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-weight-loss-spin-off-thread

Aww London i'm sorry, are you sure its af, could it be implantation? I had 2 months off before this round and honestly I think it did me good. I struggled at first because had been so focussed on ttc it was hard not to be doing anything. I toom the time to focua on my diet and enjoy a couple of guilt free drinks. Guess we'll find out soon if it worked.

Oh London I hope it's just implantation and not af.
My clinic insist on a month off in between each iui. I found it great and actually that month flew by but was great for my mental health

Sorry about AF London
Ive just had 2 months off and feel so much better for it after 5 back to back cycles
If have the break if I was you. Enjoy it! A month in this long journey is nothing and you'll be much happier for it so long as u don't feel guilty about taking the time off

Not the same I know london, but after a failed ivf they make you take a 3-4 month break, and I really enjoy that break. It's so much build up, so much stress and hoping... its good to take time off.

Really sorry london
I think a month off is good - especially if it means you can exercise and have a weekend away. You are in perfect time.
With hindsight I probably should have had more breaks but I got somewhat addicted.

I'm so sorry, London , my thought are with you.
I've had two one-cycle breaks - one was due to poor holiday planning and the second one was more due to financial reasons and also to take a break after three back-to-back IUI - I was just fed up with having my life planned in 2 weeks cycles.
I think it did me good (the first break not so much), but I do feel a bit restless, tbh. But I agree that it is a good idea, rahter than a bad one.

I am happy to be away with work for the next 2 days because it will take away the temptation to test. I am dying to test but also terrified of seeing a bfn, not sure how well I will take it this time especially as next step is IVF which will require some financial planning.

Really sorry to hear your news london. As I'm on my first try can't give advice from experience about having a break but I think I would be like you and inclined to just try again immediately. Having said that some time off might help with the stress of it all.

Not long now till OTD bear and definitely good to keep distracted. I have found being back at work helpful but need to keep reminding myself not to lift anything.

Good news is injections in the bum much less painful than in the thigh. Would not have been able to hack daily injections in the thigh for (hopefully) 12 weeks.

I find it really hard to not do what I normally do wonky, I try and not do too much but sometimes I find myself doing something and then I think oops I probably shouldn't be doing that. The not knowing what is going on inside is the hardest. I also feel like I am coming down with a rotten cold which I hope goes away quite quickly

So this roller coaster just keeps coming.

After deciding to take a break for a month, we called the clinic to schedule a chat re options. The next doc appointment is more than 3 weeks away, so we decided to just go with the third round of IUI that we have paid for, see how it goes and decide next steps with the doc after.

So I went in today for baseline scan, only to find out that I have a cyst in my right ovary that means treatment is out for this month. It's benign, probably caused by the meds, nothing to worry about. The remedy is to take oral contraceptives for a month (a bit odd for a lesbian!).

So, after all, I'm on an enforced break for a month. Some things are clearly meant to be.

And we'll see the doc 5 Oct and hopefully get started on IVF then.

Am focussing hard on the bright side - a weekend away, time with the missus, the chance to run again.

Much love to all the ladies on this thread. People don't get how hard & how up and down this all is.

Yep London it is a 🎢
Sorry about cyst but don't despair- you will get there!

I just went to have bloods again (went straight to blood clinic) as ny HIV and Hep B Core test had expired. Hopefully all will be in order for donor coordinator appt on Tuesday. Am treating myself to a taxi home - so I can inspect the works- and then may even get a taxi on to my mum's!!!

Bloody hell this process is making me crazy! I was asked to cover the on call tonight as someone had a family emergency and I said yes as I couldn't think of an excuse. Then, on my way into work I got massively emotional about the fact that I might have a stressful on call. So basically I got hideously stressed about the possibility of stress! Thankfully managed to get a colleague to cover. I blame the progesterone.

The break definitely seems meant to be london. Hopefully the OCP will sort the cyst out. Are you going to go straight to IVF now instead of doing the 3rd IUI?

Things seem to be progressing kwick. Good news. When are you thinking you are going to be getting to the actual treatment?

Hi Folks

Back again - into the breach! Good to see/hear from you all as we inch forwards! I am at my best friends - she has just had her first baby, from her first try at home insemination. I was due to be 3 months behind her - as in due in 5 weeks but i am not. It's hard. We got our IVF referral as i managed to get my weight down to target while we ere in italy, with lots of fasting and 800 cal days. Our appointment is 3rd october, i want to just start as soon as possible. Praying for us all. Angliski.

@Angliski nice to see you again! Wow! Home insemination?
I am sure it is hard but you will be preggers soon.

@Wonky35 bloody hormones hope you are feeling better today.

My AF tracker told me I will ovulate in 5 days (yesterday) so I guess that means treatment could be in October but more likely to be November- I will know more after my appt on Tuesday.

So i’m out for another month 😢 really thought it was going to work this time but af had other ideas when it appeared yesterday. I still have to go for blood test on Monday so will speak to the clinic then about possibly starting IVF. I have to order more sperm and get some additional test done so hoping I can get sorted in time for a November start but will have to wait and see.

bear really sorry - hope you can get going with the IVF

Oh 🐻 bear I'm so so sorry sweetie, that totally sucks 😔 big hugs x

So sorry bear. That’s really rubbish news. At least with IVF you know that the sperm meets the egg and that the embryo is starting to grow and looking healthy. Fingers crossed for a November start.

Thanks guys, it has been a tough one to take this month honestly. I spoke to the clinic today (after getting results of my obviously negative test). They said that I could consider IUI with stigma or IVF but honestly IUI just doesn’t have a high success rate. I was quite glad because I had already decided on IVF so happy just to go with that. They will still do my treatment review so will call me tomorrow to make consent appointment. I have quite a high AMH so hopefully should get success with IVF. Just need to see when I can get consent booked in because that was the longest part before my IUI.

Still a lot of unknowns but at least the decision has been made now.

bear and that is half the battle! Hope you can get going at a speed that is right for you.

I have my donor coordinator appt with IVI today 🤞🏼
Still have lurgy which is a right pain in the arse as if I did not feel so crap I could probably get my shit together and move back home tonight... 😷

Bear so sorry to hear your news. Glad your frontrunning IVF now. You ve given IUI your best shot, definitely don't want it with stigma tho. Lol.

And a bit late in response, but am sorry London this also wasn't your round

Good luck for your forthcoming IVF appt Angliski

I ve been off thread a bit because have been in Athens.

I have got a BFP from DD IVF. Was beside myself with the joy of 2 reasonable clear lines yesterday, and then I tottered off for a beta test (requirement of clinic) and levels were ok for day but not great, but low for what my clinic wanted. So it was a traumatic day yesterday all told, which culminated in me injecting pregnyl at midnight as a "rescue shot" - the first of 2 for now. Well I was like a cow with a gun with that, broke one of the bottles, glass smashed everywhere, didn't really have the right needles so improvised, my arse wasn't thankful for being stabbed at such a late hour. Also time ++ spent in Asda pharmacy for ordering (as at that point I didn't know I needed it) and then returning saying I needed IMMEDIATELY and luckily delivery had come in. The joys of trying to constantly get prescriptions processed because am on so many drugs and the urgency of some. Its a juggling act and am def dropping balls. I also had my blood test done in a lab in the middle of a field - ya that was an experience. Was actually wondering if they used the sheep in said field as blood donors. Ha.

Also had "cyclers" varied from my clinic telling me about their research about why using pregnyl as a rescue shot is not a good idea. Their logic was plausible having most gone thru multiple cycles and saying the false readings can lead to missed ectopic pregnancies and dragging out miscarriages for an embryo that was unviable. Its backed up by an opinion at a scanning place I ve used by a very knowledgeable nurse but I trust my clinic and in the absence of any detailed research, I am going with her. She wants to protect my precious pregnancy, and feels its the right way. I ll go with that.
Anyway trying to be optimistic - never had to have betas before, think its best to leave it to nature. The clinic is wonderful but no stone unturned, does equal more stress.

Very quiet on thread of late isn't it. Hope everyone is ok xxx

Ever I am so pleased with your BFP!!! I know it must be hard - lots of emotions but you are one step closer to your dream. Sorry to hear about your probs with administering the injection - I always fid that talking to myself helped calm me down - especially for in the bum ones. Really hope it is plain sailing for you from now one!

I just got off the phone from the IVI Donor Coordinator. And have a much clearer idea of what is what. In summary:

• in Spain donors are matched based on recipients characteristics - physical and blood type. That means baby is likely to be blue eyed like me. They have no shortage of donors - who tend to be university students. All I will learn about donors will be age and blood type (and this will be after a BFP). I have to send a picture of moi anyone any good at photoshop??
• I can have a genetic test done on the donors to rule out over 500 genetic problems (like cystic fibrosis). Results take about 20 days to come through. I have decided I will do this as an extra precaution to having a healthy baby.
• There are 9 clinics I could go to in Spain but they are fine with Alicante as my choice - apparently the person who will take care of me there is wonderful.
• Transfer will be from froze - this means that timing will not be so much of an issue. Once they have the embryos, when I get my AF I contact the clinic and then reconfirm plan and I start taking some meds and have some scans. Transfer is usually 15-20 days later.
• They always do ICSI
• All in will be around 11k but if I am lucky there will be some embryos left over
• You can fly in and out on the same day but we both agreed that would be madness!!! Preference is come the night before, fly back day after transfer. They might even do an airport pick-up service!!! Although to be honest I am fine with grabbing a cab.

The bit that pissed me off somewhat is that she does not have my medical file from IVI London - she is going to chase. WTF are they playing at???? She will send me through the consent forms today. I am getting excited... was a bit disappointed that the genetic test will add on an extra 20 days but what is that in the grand scheme of things? Also gives me longer to lose more weight - which she said was the single most important thing I could do!!! Okay - better get back and do some work....

Happy Tuesday everyone!!!

Lol ever damn auto correct. So excited for your bfp congratulations, hopefully it’s a sticky bean. Do you get another blood test or is it a case of waiting for early scan? There are always lots of opinions out there but I think you are right to trust your clinic, they genuinely want the best for you.

Glad your appt went well kwick sounds like you have a clear plan now. When are you thinking you will start, sounds like around December time once they have the embryos is that right?

I guess so bear... have not really paused to think about timeline

So excited for you kwick