#makeithappen TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided. All welcome. Thread 8

[kwick]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!

Here is the link to the previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2886793--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-All-welcome-Thread-7
And the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2863056--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-Thread-6
Here is the link to the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2832207--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2769549-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen-loadsofBFPs
Here is the link to the thread before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2688511-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2587046-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
And the one before that!: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1877198-Donor-IUI
We also have a weight loss spin off thread:www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2889818-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-weight-loss-spin-off-thread

I remember feeling a bit grotty for a day or so when I started on Suprecur and Gonal f.

So I just called the clinic to tell them I'm on CD1 and I'm all booked in and being tracked. They do IUI the day after you get your peak OPK so not long to go. When she said "so I guess we'll see you in about 12 days" I nearly cried! Its actually happening!

phoenix how exciting! You're so nearly there. Still 55 days on my countdown app till I'll (hopefully!) be at that stage! Hope the next 12 days go nice and quickly for you.

I'm so behind on the thread, but thanks all for well wishes for my consultation today! Setting off for the clinic soon, will report back later. I'm going out for a meal with my friend after to celebrate finally making a proper start!

pez I'm so pleased that the scan went well! Hope it's helped reassure you, and not long to wait until the next scan now :)

munro glad to hear the IUI was OK, and hope the start of your tww is going OK! I'm always so impressed by all the lovely outdoors things you do (and the beautiful scenery!), hope that helps keep you grounded over the next two weeks.

phoenix I've been meaning to come on the thread for aaaaaages to say thanks for sending me the spreadsheet link! I'll update it later after my consultation when I should hopefully have more idea of next steps.

My other update is that I met a local 'solo mum' at the weekend through my local DCN group, which was ace as she was lovely. She has a gorgeous six months old girl and was so kind and encouraging about everything, made me feel really reassured that things will all be OK. She even offered to give me a lift when I have my iui! I feel like this whole process has really made me appreciative of how amazing women are - when I was at school I didn't have many female friends, but now I have loads, and I've met so many strong and inspiring women since starting this (looking at all of you here!)

pickle - I don't know if they offer aspiration. That's a good thought, though - I will definitely ask. Thanks.

My DP felt sick/odd on some of her stimulation injections, certainly. We were told it's normal. She also (TMI!) had a bit of loose bowels!

phoenix - ooh, what a lovely feeling! You're on track!

snork - that's so lovely.

Phoenix I am so frigging excited for you 😁😁😁😁 (12days is my predicted iui date too)

Ok so I've just had my consultation and now waiting for my counselling sessions which is at 5pm.

Reeling slightly as the consultant has advised that I should have a diagnostic laparoscopy under general anaesthetic before starting treatment, because of complications/adhesions after my appendix burst when I was 8. Basically to check tubes are clear but also that everything is still where it should be (tubes next to ovaries etc) which wouldn't show on the usual test (something something ping something?!) Will then know whether IUI is suitable or whether I need to go straight to ivf. He said its up to me if I have it, but with my circumstances he'd advise it. I think it makes sense, I'd rather spend an extra 2k at this stage if it means making more informed decisions/better use of treatment costs!

Feeling a bit lonely for the first time in the process though, just because it was a bit unexpected and it feels weird having to make the decision on my own without anyone here to bounce it off. And the thought of having a general anaesthetic :-/

On the plus side, going private means it won't delay things too much as should be speedy! And I spoke to mum who said they can help me with the costs, I just feel weirdly guilty about it. Also I guess if things aren't as they should be i will find out, if I was doing this the 'normal' way I might not have found out for another couple of years, and might have ended up needing fertility treatment anyway!

Sorry for ramble, hanging out in the hospital Costa feeling a bit weird and needed to vent :)

Off to implications counselling now, hope that's got fewer surprises!

Big hugs Snork First off you are not alone - you've got this amazing group of kickass women to bounce stuff off whenever you need to. We're never going to get bored of it so don't worry. I was just thinking yesterday I don't know what I'd do without all you lot.

Secondly I think its probably good this Dr raised this now - at least you didn't have to go through a bunch of treatments and then they say "hmmm we should look at this". You'll know what is your best chance. And if you want to go ahead without it you'll know you have options. And as you said - going private won't really slow things down.

Keep us posted as to how the counsellor goes...

x

Sorry to hear about the extra tests needed Snork. I would be like you though and prefer to have everything checked before spending lots on fertility treatment. I had an hycosy for this reason, I wouldn't have been able to live with the doubt that I was spending lots of IUIs when my tubes could be blocked.
Is this not a procedure you could have done through the NHS or an another private clinic that could be cheaper than a FC? It's worth checking especially if you have private health insurance.

Completely understand this is very overwhelming right now but soon all will be clearer and you'll be able to make decisions

Hope the implications counselling went well. This is a tough journey with hurdles constantly thrown our way but totally worth it in the end.
A laparoscopy would also increase your chances of conceiving so it's definitely good advice they've given you

Snork sorry it's added in a few extra complications but as you say these are things you may never have found out if you hadn't gone down this route #somethingshappenforareason
Hope you got on well with your implications counselling. Quite good timing to have that straight after, found them quite helpful to put my racing mind to rest a bit

snork disappointing when you get news that you are not expecting hopefully the counselling helped a bit. Ultimately I guess having the tests mean that you can ensure you are getting the right treatment.

Snork, one of the very, very few times I can remember feeling lonely in the last few years was when I unexpectedly found out that I would have to have my wrist re-broken and plated under GA. I came out of the appointment and I felt like crying, but I was standing myself on Harley St and there was no one to cry to and no logical reason to cry. I just felt really vulnerable. It was something about the idea of doing something violent to my body I think.

The GA will be fine. They monitor you so carefully the chances of anything going wrong with that are vanishingly small.

Hope you're enjoying your celebratory meal and that the implications counselling was ok.

Phoenix, great news!

Look what I collect today only about 4weeks 1day and 11 hours till test day

Ah pickle it's all going on for you, huh?! So glad you are on the meds already! Take note of all your symptoms and how things are making you feel, in case you need it should this time round not be successful, if it all gets too horrid then you could look to change meds.

pez how marvellously exciting re the scan! So happy for you!

Can't recall who it was talking about ivf? I've had two rounds, and practically breezed through both in a great humour. I had bloating and ached a lot from carrying all those eggs and from collection, but my friends and I have had positive experiences on the whole.

So I'm off to Wales on Saturday for my appt with CRGW. I prepped all my notes today to take with me on the last two rounds I've had.

I also have found a local sonogram clinic who specialise in runner get monitoring scans for far flung fertility clinics. Feeling very happy right now.

Oh, and I'm bringing forward my next ivf. It's gonna be June. Thanks mum for the small loan as she didn't want me doing it during their hols in Jul and Aug!

Ooh stork can't wait to hear about your first appointment with them :)
Your mum is so cute, glad it's been brought forward

Reading the side effects of the leaflet, what I'm getting is quite normal-headaches which are more like migraine feeling ✅ stomach ache ✅ contains lactose so going to make ibs worse. TBH with my ibs I'm used to feeling in agony with my tummy so I can deal,totally for a worthy cause :) thankfully only got tomorrow and Monday and Tuesday at work. Just so excited it's all finally starting 😊

So my baseline scan seemed to go well, I was concerned lining was going to be too thick but clinic phoned this afternoon and said I am good to start mess tomorrow. Last tablet is Monday night and booked in for another scan next Wed where I think they will be able to give me a better indication of iui date. Eeeek everything is falling into place ☺️

Yeh bear that's fab news. What meds are you on? I have my scan Wednesday too 😁

I'm on letrozole, which I believe is like clomid but less chance of multiples, can't believe it's all starting. Feels like it has taken ages to get here

Totally seems like forever doesn't it, but we are here :)

Thanks so much all, you're all lovely, I'm so grateful for your support and knowledgeable advice! Just got home after my meal and feeling a lot clearer now. I think I will go ahead with it, it definitely feels best to have all the info so I can make the best decisions.

witch, i think that's it, the feeling vulnerable! I think my anxiety about the operation is partly because the last time I was in hospital was for the appendicitis, I was in for a month and it was quite traumatic as I was so young (and there were some really horrid nurses!). But I spoke to my sister in law as she had a laparoscopy done at the same place I'd be referred to, she said it was fine and the hospital was super swanky

Implications counselling was fine! I felt like what you said, pickle, just quite enjoyed talking about it! I think I might have slightly overwhelmed the woman by how much thought I have put into it, ha ha. She was scribbling away trying to keep up with me Definitely felt better after that, and reading your posts here, thanks all xx

Seems like it's a happening for everyone at the moment, lots going on - bear, pickle and phoenix all poised and ready to go! And stork too, great you can bring it forward :) So excited for you all!

pez the laparoscopy will be private but at a separate hospital rather than the FC, and costs wise doesn't seem as bad as I first thought when he mentioned it! Plus hopefully should be able to get it done fairly quickly. I'm going to ring the consultant tomorrow to say I'll go ahead with it, now I've decided I just want to keep moving things forward!

Hi all, behind on thread again.

After a very shaky couple of weeks where I ve nearly slashed my wrists as was so agitated about everything.... its finally all systems go with my IVF2. I start next Wednesday. So as its long protocol could well be in latter stages of treatment with you Stork. Think if I get to EC it will be around 7th June from my patchy calculations because last time I had treatment ended up being on menopur for 12 days. Am glad you have a date your working towards anyway and hope the appt at CRGW works out well. I too had no problem with the physical aspects of IVF, down regging, stimming and after EC within 10 mins of regaining consciousness was wandering the unit looking for biscuits, wasn't at all sore. The worst thing about the whole process was the embryo transfer but that was only 5 mins. I appreciate others do have terrible symptoms on the drugs, and actually as pickle is finding even if you re doing medicated IUI, they are the same drugs but lesser quantity. Everyone's different. The emotional side is another story though.
Woohoo Stork Pickle Bear and Phoenix, and anyone else (sorry if I ve missed anyone) lets hope for some BFPs during May/Jun period.
Continued luck for pez Karen munro. And shoes looking forward to hearing news about littleshoes.. I reckon girl btw.
*snork, am glad you re feeling ok about getting the lap done and then you can just plough ahead without any concerns

I was ready to rant about the situation I ve found myself in, but am seeing a new bereavement counsellor today so am hoping I can find a coherent way of dealing with the loss whilst forging ahead with a new treatment cycle. Was waiting for a nurse appt as had clearance about going ahead as hit the BMI target, and I thought that was the only issue, but it turned out that they weren't happy about me using the Cryos donor I used based on number of pregnancies (despite confirming this was fine when I saw Consultant), I was devastated, and then they u - turned saying its fine, as its a sibling link. There has been a real hassle over the pregnancy slot. I ve lost the plot trying to understand it all.

So after every possible emotion going, I now can order the sperm, because of the timing I need a private prescription posted for the norethisterone and am seeing the nurse the day I start. Usually would be earlier on in the cycle. So now I just have to hope I don't have any kind of early bleed which would end of cancelling the cycle. What a game this is, ahh

Eeek Bear how exciting! This train is definitely moving!

Ever I'm so sorry to hear its been so hard for you and your clinic can't make their mind up. They don't sound helpful or considerate given your situation you'd think they'd get their shit together.

Sounds like you've managed to right it to a strong enough degree that you can move forward. I hope the bereavement counsellor was helpful. Big hugs!

Aww ever I hope you manage to get going now with no more obstacles. It feels like things have been made way more difficult for you than they should be

Yay we're on the way now pickle