Why are there so many women over 50 who are single?

[Frazzled54]

I was thinking the other night about the amount of women in their 50’s who are single.
I know of at least 10! (including myself)
I wonder if this is because menopause has made them realise they are happier alone so they don't make the concerted effort to meet someone? Or is is because men in their 50’s prefer younger women?
Just pondering really… 🤔

I'm not quite 50 - although not far off, and I just can't be bothered with a bloke. I'm looking forward to the kids flying the nest and having no-one depending on me at all - when I think of having another relationship, it just feels like a potential millstone around my neck rather than something uplifting.

I've got a job, kids, hobbies, and I'd prefer to spend my time doing things I want to do rather than putting yet another man first. No need to shave anything I don't feel like shaving,

I am single, and know a lot of single women. I think we congregate a bit, it can be easier to meet other single women?

Hmm, I can see if you've never met anyone or are nervous you'd feel lonely but i've had as much D as I wanted and I'm done cleaning up after men. DP is purely lucky he hasnt done anything to offend me so far (and I am honest with him about this because I'm a horrible battleaxe these days). I know in my bones I just dont have the tolerance for a man from here on in, it hasnt been all its cracked up to be for me, or any of my female friends and relatives tbh.

Because they all came in to Mumsnet for advice after their husband bought bad Christmas presents & the advice they were given was to leave him!

Now they are all single 🤷‍♀️

I'm mid 40s. Single for some time and I wouldn't want it any other way.

As I get older I get more disillusioned as to how anyone copes with a man. I now watch families and look at the woman often feeling grateful I don't have one. When I read stories on here I actually feel anger in my stomach sometimes and wonder how so many are able to remain sane and calm. I envisage myself reaching for the frying pan in a similar predicament.

It's best all round for everyone that I remain ( happily) single! 🥳😀

Because they've realised that very often life is much nicer, calmer, more enjoyable, and more peaceful without a man.

^^This!

When I was young I fell for the notion (heavily socially promoted) that it was a terrible failure and terribly sad not to have a man, children, family etc. I remember feeling very sorry for older women who were (old-fashioned word!) “spinsters” or single divorcees or widows. How terrible to be on your own in later life, I thought as a teenager/young woman.

Ha! Now I’m in my 40s I can’t think of anything nicer! I see how happy my mother’s friends are in their fifties, sixties and seventies when they’re single, and how full and interesting their lives are (and how their still-married friends are still running round after grumpy, irascible, stuck in their ways and demanding husbands). It had honestly not occurred to me that when older women said they were happier on their own it was completely true, and now I realise I was a fool not to understand how nice it is for women not to put up with men in later life.

Oh I had a 20 year marriage, but after that ended I've been single 10 years. I preferred being married, so I guess it's just a matter of preference.

I'm not 50 yet, couple of years to go.
It's very simple.
I can't be arsed!
I have a nice life, a lovely flat in a nice location, lots of interests and activities, varied work, pets and friends.
I also have a lot of dreams and places I want to travel and treks I want to do. There just isn't the time in all of that to be meeting someone and starting a relationship and putting the effort in that is needed to maintain that relationship.
I'm happy as I am and I don't need or want a man in my life.

I knew a couple who split. Obviously loneliness is the hardest part of being single. To combat it she threw herself in to hobbies, clubs and building up a social life. He threw himself into dating because he couldn't think what else to do.
I've noticed as woman become older they become more sociable, outgoing and open to new experiences, they develop a new zest for life after dedicating so much of their adult lives to supporting others. Whereas men just seem to get more stuck in their ways and grumpier.

If there was any reason dh and I were no longer together, I would not look for another partner. Friend, holiday companion sure. But that's the limit

Women over 50 just won't take any shit anymore. Simple.

This sounds ideal

I'm loving this. A lot of these comments have really made me laugh with delight! Almost 4 years separated, 7 months divorced; at 53 and 3 dc between 16 and 20, I simply cannot imagine sharing my life again with a man. 2024 has been really hard work but I am looking forward to a whole new chapter in 2025, learning about myself and pushing myself out of my comfort zone to try new things and meet new people, living in a completely different area.

Late 30's here, single 10 years and do not see that changing any time soon. My life is ace, I study, I work, have older kids who see their dad regularly. I spend all my free time with family and friends doing the things I love!

No man can compare. They also get scared off by how full my life is and how happy I am without a man.

I'm single by choice because:

• I don't get lonely so I'm not motivated to spend lots of time with people (although I'm sociable)
• My sex drive isn't high these days so I'm not motivated to date anyone. Vibrators do the trick when needed.
• I'm not sexually attracted to overweight men and most are (shoot me). I am fine with baldness, dentures, missing limbs, and scars, but not flab.
• I'm financially secure so don't need a 2nd person to live comfortably
• I get to enjoy the company of men at my hobbies and don't feel I want to increase that by dating
• Dating is such hard work and I can't be arsed
• I have enough to occupy my life and I'm not sure I can or want to fit dating in

I'm not ruling dating out if it happens organically but I'm not searching for it. A FWB would be OK I suppose and has worked well for me in the past, and it probably suits me better than a "relationship".

Because men are shit and at 50+ irredeemable. 50+ women know that.

Men going for the younger women, new pointy boobs.

Let them, I'm all about the younger men, they seem to love older women. Would very much recommend for uncomplicated fun 😁

I think it's around that age that you realise just how shit men are. IME anyway.

Both but there are also more men in this country. I think 2% more. It’s not a tiny number when you think about it.

50+men are either looking for a younger woman. Alternatively many financially solvent 50+ women will choose a partner carefully to be sure they do not end up bank rolling a man looking for a future nurse with a purse.

plus many older men just monologue forever and are incapable of a two way conversation.

I have never been married.
My dating history is shit.
It stems from trauma.
Created by men.
So I don't bother.
There are better things in life for me.

Just lucky I guess!

Yep same here
I think I would more likely date another women now - you up for that? 😉🤣🤣

seriously I’m a very trendy asexual now. Maybe I could claim to be pan sexual. I might ev3n give identifying as a man a go 😉 . Menopause did that. And a 30 year difficult marriage that burnt me out with “caring” and being sole breadwinner

can’t say I’m abundantly happy being divorced at this stage of my life, but I’m happier not being with a bloke.

i think there’s an element of realising that at my age most blokes who’d be vaguely interested would be 70plus and looking for someone to “look after them till death do us part” etc. fuck that. Did it for 20 years of a 30 year marriage. Came off worse for it. Not going to set myself up to repeat that probability.

whats clear to me dealing with random blokes, now I’m not with a bloke called a husband, is how dismissive, disrespectful and generally unpleasant they can be to me as a women over a certain age on her own. All the time I’m invisible it’s fine. But if I can’t be invisible they can be absolutely shit. Especially trades blokes. Sorry if you’re married to one. I’m sure yours is lovely. But I’m now fracking terrified of having to get work done in the house - one builder was openly hurling abusive swear words at me in hope I’d tell him to not darken my doorstep agian so he could walk of with my money on a not completed job. Just a horrible traumatic shitty experience that was nail in coffin for me.

it isn’t all men, I have brothers and sons. And a fine nephew, relatives are ok with me. But random strange men or intimate relationships, no thanks. Wide berth and avoidance tactic in place for last 3 years. So no chance of meeting a decent one.

fianlly, at 60 and various operations and time vs gravity factors, I don’t see myself having any man attracted to me. Hey ho, that’s a confidence thing form a very difficult marriage. But no real incentive to gain any of that lost confidence back.

I’ve been married twice. First time for only four years to a man child who told me after we got pregnant (planned) that it was all a bit much and did I really want to have a baby? I divorced him. The baby is now 24 and a wonderful young man.
Second husband turned out to be a sulker. Days on end of the silent treatment over the smallest things.

I’ve been happily single now for three years. The people who’ve been there for me have all been women. The ones who’ve broken me, men. I can now do what I want, when and with whom. I don’t ever wish to be coupled again. I’m not impressed with men.

I’d like someone to travel with, a “companion” if you like. I work part time; I run/gym/dog walk/go out with female friends but honestly, it’d need to be a very exceptional man now, for me to think him worth it. There’s nothing I “need” a man for.