Why are there so many women over 50 who are single?

[Frazzled54]

I was thinking the other night about the amount of women in their 50’s who are single.
I know of at least 10! (including myself)
I wonder if this is because menopause has made them realise they are happier alone so they don't make the concerted effort to meet someone? Or is is because men in their 50’s prefer younger women?
Just pondering really… 🤔

.... I visit peoples homes ... a very large number if them .... every day for a luving ..... I go behind peoples closed doors , I see people as they really are , not what say they are on websites

What job do you do where you meet very many women every single day and talk to them about how and where they date and how they are so lonely and want a relationship?

I know a lot of divorced men around the same age but as posters have already said, they tend to aim for new relationships with ideally younger partners. Bit weird really and doesn’t seem like a happy arrangement in most cases with the added complexity of diluting their children’s inheritance…

Becsuse the single men in their 60s my age are revolting.
Im only interested in men who are worthy of me. I don't want to end up like my neighbour who has really scraped the bottom of the barrel with the man she found after divorce.
She's a good looking hard working woman. He is a repulsive cocklodger who smokes 60 a day and has dark brown teeth.
I also have my own house and career and I can't risk those things by getting married again, not this close to retirement.
I am incredibly intolerant of men.

... they tell me !!!!!!!! , and over the past 14 years I have visited over 20,000 + homes .... now what job involves going into a lot of homes to do something and involvesc talking to the person in the home and is done 300 , 400 , 500 times a week .... answers on a post card ....

The same as many others: if my current relationship ended for whatever reason, I don’t think I would seek another. Sex isn’t all
that important to me any more, I’m able to be happy on my own and I have lovely friends for companionship.

Very simple - women are choosier and wiser, but there are very few men to chose from.

Yep, also - all the guys my age (mid 50s) who become single date women at least 10 years younger. I tried flirting with one - he recoiled in horror ))) Seen him recently with someone in their 30s I would never be able to compete with. What can I say, good on him)

Because once we’ve done our wife and mother years, we realise that living alone and having peace and quiet is priceless. The thought of coming home from work and having a person there who wants to talk to me is a nightmare!

If I met someone amazing I might consider dating but I would never ever ever live with someone again. I enjoy my own space and peace too much.

And over 50 the pool of eligible men is as shallow as a puddle after a 5 minute rain shower. Most of them looking for a nurse with a purse - no thank you.

I don't think i'd want another relationship if my marriage ended. It's nice to be free and you've not got all the work.

Is there any historical precedent for this? I mean, men have been abandoning their wives and running off with a younger model for millennia. What used to happen to women who were left on they own after 50? I guess in the past they did not have access to generous pensions (their own or ex husbands), and they didn’t benefit from universal free at point healthcare? A lot of them might have ended up looking after ageing parents maybe - especially if they hadn’t had children of their own? There’s less social pressure to do that now and to some extent, society steps in to do that as well.

humm, maybe a socioeconomic / cultural shift then, one that actually benefits women.

do you think it will last? quite a few on here are mentioning boomer / generous pensions, which are going to disappear.

Both my grandmothers were widowed young and never remarried. I can’t remember them ever having boyfriends or partners. For both, it was a conscious choice to protect their income / family assets for their children. My mums mum had an occupational widows pension that she received when her husband died, and she would lose that if she remarried. And my dad’s mum inherited a farm from her husband. She would never have jeopardised that passing to her children, though family legend says there were plenty of men sniffing around. She was only in her early 30s, a 6 yr old and a 2 yr old, and a teacher by trade - she didn’t know anything about farming! But she stuck at it.

not much resemblance to the ‘merry widow’ stories here though - I guess the boomer years have allowed a lot of middle class women to stay single into later life, having had a career / benefitted from property boom etc.

We’re on holiday on the French Côte d’Azur just now, and I was just saying to DH Tuesday that it’s very noticeable how many solo female travellers in their 50s and 60s, and very few - if any - solo men in the same age bracket.

you really should look a little bit harder ......... ! we pretend not to be British

So many women over 50 are single because it’s great!!

Exactly

Agree with this too

I'm 57. Most definitely not lonely, or desperate for a new partner. In fact, the thought of a partner absolutely feels me with dread.

I have done a long marriage and that was enough for me.

I do everything I want for me, and when I want. I arrive home to no drama, intolerable behaviour and its bliss.

Im happy to live out the rest of my life adapting to being single and the happiness it provides.

You only have to read the pages on here to realise why women over a certain age have had enough of ‘ men ‘ . Look at the issues from sex pests to slovenly to bully / control . Nah the last chapter of our lives is for us . It’s hard to find a decent man over 50 so we are solvent with our own properties , do what we want when we want with our friends who support and champion us . If you want sex find a FWB or holiday fling but longer term nah thanks .

I am too traumatised to risk it again. The men i ended up with were violent, abusive or cheats. I am lucky i have my kids and my own house and a good job. I don't have space for anything else and value peace too much.

Mid 50s here. I've been in my own home for a short while now after 25 years with LTP. My home is a lovely calm space. I can't describe the relief of not having to walk on egg shells or pander to another person's brittle moods. As other PPs have said - it's bliss. I've got good friends and family close by, a good secure job. I can decorate completely as i wish without compromise. I can invite friends / family over without feeling guilty. In fact, i can just BE without another person making me feel as though i'm not worthy.
I keep pinching myself as I almost didn't jump - thank GOD I did. I can't imagine ever chosing to give this preciousness up.

Men are largely rubbish & they think we’re past our sell by date? Just finished dating a man 10 years my senior (I’m mid 40s) who looked every bit his age, not in shape… but he felt I should be satisfied because he really liked my personality and could “settle” for me because I was vaguely attractive/youthful looking even though ideally all men want a size 8 25 year old and looks aren’t as important to him now/ personality is more important. I mean WTAF? Shame because we actually got along so well and dated for quite awhile but I knew something was off actually. And I’m no oil supermodel but if either of us was punching, it was definitely him. He was bald, middle aged pregnant esque tummy, very wrinkled and yet I should be grateful he isn’t as shallow as his younger years. So THAT is why I am definitely staying single. Heaven forbid I want a man who fancies the pants off me AND likes my personality?!

Im 44 but have just come out of a 26 year marriage. Im so happy being on my own with the kids. The house is cleaner, theres less food to buy, no dirty underpants thrown next to the washing basket, no walking on egg shells. Its great. Im seriously considering not looking for anyone else and staying single! I dont know why its taken me so long to make the break of splitting up. It was some form of societal pressure that you wont cope on your own/need a man in your life/shame of divorce! Its a load of rubbish

i do however feel immense sadness for all of those women before us who had no choice but to stick it out with their oafs. Then were celebrated for making it 50/60 years married. Good god, were they really happy years or a case of put up and shut up? 🧐

At 54 and twice divorced,i've been single for 8 peaceful years.
Decorate my home how i like
plant stuff and do the garden,make mistakes like putting up trellis wrong but no man to judge and sheer
Long pubes and hairy legs are no issue
No in-laws to visit and remind ex to sort gifts
Go for a walk,drive in the car,watch whatever on tv without feeling you have to tell them
Cook whatever you fancy for tea. I love eating at 4.30 at the moment.
No more blowjobs thank goodness.

yes it can be lonely, but many people are who are in relationships. You just have to get out there really.

I also feel repulsed by the amount of men who don't wash their hands after using the loo and straight away it puts more barriers up,I mean why would I want their fingers anywhere near me. Menopause is true,pausing men!

I think both

I’m in my 30s and plodding along with dating as I’d like another child. My age limit is 49 on the apps and 1 in 5 men say ‘actually 53 - don’t know how to change it! Or ‘just wanted to make sure I show up in your searches’
i went on a date with a 52 year old I met recently ‘in the wild’ so we didn’t talk ages until our first official date, and he admitted to me that he pretends to be 46, and that his upper age limit is 42 and it’s NOT because he wants more kids (which would be more understandable) it’s because he prefers what women under 42 look like. I was so so so put off. Lying and only dating women over 10 years younger. Ick ick ick.