Is a dad buying necessary underwear for his pre-pubescent daughter weird?

[Dadinhove]

I have my 11 yr old daughter 50% of the time. I bough her an extra first bra (same size and brand as existing) for her hols with me. Her mother thinks it’s “wholly inappropriate for me, father to my child, to be buying her underwear and gas threatened to take matters further if I do it again. Am I missing something? What on earth is wrong with a dad buying his daughter necessary underwear like this? Would love to know if in fact I am being unreasonable/ in appropriate.

OP, you sound like a great dad.

Your ex is being crazy and I can see why she is your ex.

Carry on being a thoughtful parent, OP and ignore your ex.

I see nothing wrong with it whatsoever, you're buying a necessary item of clothing. Would be the exact same as me buying my son boxers! She needs to get a grip.

@Dadinhove as long as your daughter is comfortable with it, it is fine. My parents were divorced and my M had awful mental health issues. Meant my DF did a lot of covering my "necessities" for a few years. Was in the late 80/90s and it was fine.

The periods have started too. Was a bit uncertain how to approach but a bit if tact and “I’m here if you need me” approach seemed to do the trick. She’s now had about 3 periods and isn’t embarrassed at all. I just need to factor in the mood swings and be more tolerant at times. X

I used to prefer clothes shopping with my dad, he would get bored and spend more to hurry me along.

You dd is ok with it which really is all that matters.

Oh good lord! My eldest daughter would be embarrassed. Dd2, not so much. But it's just clothes!!

In the same way that I buy socks and pants for the boys when required, I would expect dh to get underwear for the girls if he were going shopping.

How on earth does she think you manage laundry if you're not allowed to deal with your daughter's underwear?

Oh good god what is the world coming too! She is being completely unreasonable (of course based on the scenario as you described it)

the only reason I can think she said that is if you’ve left some vital information out, but otherwise no it’s completely and utterly fine and normal!

Wish I'd had a dad like you at that age! My mother wasn't in my life and my dad should have picked up where she left off, but he didn't and I was too scared/inarticulate to ask for most of what I needed. The anxiety it caused was just awful.

Keep being a good dad!

Would you be ok to buy pants for your son's? At what age did it become improper for him to buy her underwear? Could he grab a multi pack of pants when she was 5? Was he permitted to buy nappies? Vests when she was 8? What about sanitary towels? Condoms?

Utter nonsense. Get a grip.

It's fine to buy a child underwear.

What if the mum is dead? Just go without?

Your poor daughter

But they're the devil's hammocks.

My husband would tell me where to go if I started telling him he couldn't buy underwear for our daughter. I wouldn't even dream of being so controlling anyway.

@MrsSkylerWhite -i think it’s an idle threat as she’s a bit of a control freak. I doubt I’ll need a defence lawyer if she really wanted to go hard!

I lament for times past when there were far more stricter protocols and people knew their place.

Eh? We haven't somehow gone back in time, have we?

@InkyPinkyPonky24 I’ve basically told her where to go already. I think it’s absurd x

My thoughts exactly!

Is this a reverse? The OP often puts an ‘x’ at the end of a post, which is a female trait?

This thread is nuts and the fact that a dad buying underwear for his child is viewed as anything other than normal is just pathetic.

Absolutely! It's concerning that the mum would sexualise it.

Are you seriously saying that nobody could actually have a different opinion to you, therefore everyone on here who says they don't think he did anything wrong are all lying because your view is the only possible genuine view?

Are you joking in your post and I've missed it or are you actually a

No, annoyingly it just seems to be an online trait for both sexes.

Because everyone wears pants but bras are highly gendered, obviously.

Like I said, nothing wrong at all with a dad buying a bra, but this girl has a mum and if she's more comfortable with her mum buying her bras then that's fair enough imo. Turns out she's fine with OP doing it, so happy days.

Perhaps you could have added "the Mosque on Fridays".