What to take to prison 2

[drinkswineoutofamug]

Not a great title but can't think of anything catching this time of the morning. Will figure out how to link to the old thread.

Picked daughter up from the police custody suite last night. A set up by her girlfriend I'm fucking fuming. Girlfriend was stopping daughter from leaving. Gf mum came upstairs to see what the noise was about. Gf punched my daughter. Gf mum phoned the police. Gf then blamed my daughter for something earlier in the week that my day had warned gf parents about. Parents didn't stick up for my daughter but lied to protect their daughter. My daughter arrested 😡
Sorry if that's confusing.
Released with no charge. The police where really good with her.

At least she was released with no charge. Will she go back with her gf do you think?

Her friend has been round today. All I can say is wow. A lot of stuff came out about the gf. Proven with screen shots of messages.
She is a twisted toxic bitch, I wouldn't piss on her if she's on fire.
Been shopping with daughter , brought her some new jumpers for winter. Myself a bobble hat as it keeps trying to snow and I swear I saw a penguin on the high street! And a lovey goose creek candle from tk max , butter cookies, could stick a spoon in it smells that good.
Waiting for our shopping delivery , hot drinks and watching Netflix.
I really hope she that won't be named turns up, bucket of cold water I think

Back in custody. She been held until court Monday. Going bed I've had enough.

Oh Drinks, sending you a vitual hug.

Oh drinks 

Oh no! What a rollercoaster. I’m not surprised you’ve had enough. Hugs.

I'm on a 6 day stretch from today, so that will keep my mind off things. I've also got a presentation to sort and my uni stuff. Tbh , I've given up. Yes I want to know that she's safe, but she's her own worse enemy. Her decisions mostly made when drunk are stupid and self centred. She doesn't give a flying fuck about anyone else. Totally lacks empathy, argues that it's everybody's fault except hers. Her up bring is to blame. If so why are her brother and sister successfully working? One in their own flat. As normal I do question if I did something wrong while bringing them up. This has now caused problems between her dad and me. We argue all the time and I think I'm slowly falling out of love with him. I get no support. Can you love someone but not be in love with them? Or is my head that much of a mess I'm questioning myself?

Drinks, I've been reading your thread since you started it. And I really think you need to put yourself and your relationship with your DH and other children first.

Whatever you do for your daughter will never be enough, she will always do what she wants. She will continue to bounce between your home, the GF and prison, and around again and again.

Don't throw away your long marriage because of her otherwise you are going to end up alone and still worrying about whether your daughter is with you, the GF or in prison.

Oh Drinks x 💐what a crock! Sorry to hear the update x

Oh drinks. I was so sad to read your update. I know how difficult it is to try and let go of your kids but I really think you need to prioritise having a long chat with hubby and seeing if you can reconnect somehow. Is he not worried about yr dd too? I have to agree with clutterbug ... whatever she does is down to her. Yes you can support her when she decides she needs help with the drinking but until then you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. Hugs x

Hi,

There's a thread running in AIBU where the OP looks in need of support.

Will my son go to prison? http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/amiibeingunreasonable/3407802-Will-my-son-go-to-prison

She's been encouraged by a few posters to come over here (and I hope she does - it's on AIBU atm and as you can imagine there are a number of unsupportive posts).

Just thought a heads up might be useful if the regulars on here haven't seen it.

Tx

On my way ....

Thanks Drinks - that's kind of you.

I genuinely think she's in need of the understanding and practical support that she'd receive here and hope she finds her way over to your thread. 

I’ve left a message on the thread inviting her over. Thank you for the heads up.

Left a message too. Hope the op comes to visit us.

Ive ended up reading both your threads thanks to the AIBU post. Just wanted to say I hope one day your daughter beats her demons, and realises how truly awesome a mother she has. You sound like you've been to hell and back, and I hope one day soon there's light at the end of the tunnel for you as a family.

Some shitty responses on AIBU. Hopefully none of those people ever learns the living hell each of us are in eh...I wouldn't wish this shit on my worst enemy.

As was posted on the other thread

There but the grace of god .

She's in court tomorrow. I'm worn out after a nightmare shift today. But that tense I think I'm going to explode. Had another huge argument with him indoors. Told him from now on he can deal with the courts, probation, substance misuse, social services because I've had enough. He says he can't as he works 🤬 what the fucking hell does he think I do 6 days a week? Play at nurses????? Pretend to deal with ill people and members of the public after they've had their world implode. I'm done. Or just at the end of my tither . Sorry ranted again

Hi - I've lurked in this thread, hence why I knew to find it when I saw the AIBU today.

I can't and won't pretend that I know what any of you are going through.

What I can say is that this thread has been very enlightening in the sense of:

• the impact on families of offenders;
• how hard it is to get meaningful support;
• lack of rehabilitation programmes;
• the financial cost of supporting a prisoner;
• the daily emotional toil of navigating the system.

I wish you all well 

I hope all goes well today drinks. I’m sorry your dh is being an idiot. It’s tempting to say that yr dd should be dealing with all this and not you. But I think all of us on here know that when it comes to our kids we would move heaven and earth to try and help them - even though they don’t help themselves. And maybe when sometimes they don’t even deserve our help. Will be thinking of you today anyway x

I will be thinking of you today Drinks. And to the poster who is having a hard time in AIBU, welcome when you finally arrive.

By 4pm at the end of play we will find out what's happened. I'm plodding into work running on coffee

Thank you for your kind messages x

She here on a 28 day order of some sort can get no sense out of her. If she breaks the order straight to prison.