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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

8th Dec 6pm press conference

687 replies

PurpleDaisies · 08/12/2021 17:14

Whitty
Vallance
Johnson

I wonder what they’ll say.

OP posts:
toomuchlaundry · 09/12/2021 08:25

Any increase is absolutely horrific, but it is also horrific that we should be relying on schools to be the safe havens for children who have horrendous home lives. What about the evenings, weekends, holidays? Children shouldn’t be in these positions full-stop. Can’t imagine a life where you only have safety for 7 hours a day, term time only.

It’s not lockdown that carried out the violence, it is the parents/partners.

MarshaBradyo · 09/12/2021 08:29

@toomuchlaundry

Any increase is absolutely horrific, but it is also horrific that we should be relying on schools to be the safe havens for children who have horrendous home lives. What about the evenings, weekends, holidays? Children shouldn’t be in these positions full-stop. Can’t imagine a life where you only have safety for 7 hours a day, term time only.

It’s not lockdown that carried out the violence, it is the parents/partners.

The reality is lockdown makes it worse.
rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:32

The reality is lockdown makes it worse which has turned into a convenient excuse for anti-lockdown types.

Anyone who has voted Tory in the last eleven years didn't give a shit about domestic violence or child neglect - they have cut all necessary services brutally. No point wringing your hands now.

Itisasecret · 09/12/2021 08:34

@rrhuth

The reality is lockdown makes it worse which has turned into a convenient excuse for anti-lockdown types.

Anyone who has voted Tory in the last eleven years didn't give a shit about domestic violence or child neglect - they have cut all necessary services brutally. No point wringing your hands now.

This.
MarshaBradyo · 09/12/2021 08:34

Anyone who backs more lockdown is ok with the damage.

I’m not so I can’t.

rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:34

I phrased that clumsily because we are all anti-lockdown at heart! - I mean those who want to do nothing about covid. They whine 'won't someone think of the children' but they don't really give a shit.

MarshaBradyo · 09/12/2021 08:35

I felt differently before but the harm is accumulative and we have vaccines.

TheVampiresWife · 09/12/2021 08:36

@rrhuth While I completely agree that provision for DA help is dire in the UK, it's an absolute fact that if victims are left alone with their abusers for months on end violence will increase. It would be true even if provision was excellent.

Have you ever lived with a manipulative, violent partner? Can you imagine how they might use lockdown as an opportunity to increase their campaign of abuse? Many abusers forbid victims from seeing friends or family so they can continue their abuse away from what they see as prying eyes. Lockdown is a perfect way to do just that.

Yes, provision needs to improve. But it hasn't, and won't anytime soon. It's not 'false choice' - this is the situation we're in. Leave victims of abuse alone with their abusers and the abuse will worsen. Add to that the fact that many victims will have felt completely isolated from friends, family or channels of 'official' help and it's a recipe for disaster.

Many victims feel unable to seek help anyway. For people like them, no amount of extra provision will help. Not being shut up for months with the person terrorising them, however, might.

rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:37

@MarshaBradyo

Anyone who backs more lockdown is ok with the damage.

I’m not so I can’t.

I am not OK with any damage. And no one backs more lockdown.

I have never voted for a perty who would cut vital services for women and children. I will take no lectures from anyone who voted Tory - if you did you voted for cuts to refuges and children's services. If you ever voted for that, you have no right to moan about domestic violence or harm to children because you chose to increase it.

MarshaBradyo · 09/12/2021 08:38

@rrhuth

I phrased that clumsily because we are all anti-lockdown at heart! - I mean those who want to do nothing about covid. They whine 'won't someone think of the children' but they don't really give a shit.
What a gross post - that line trotted out.

Yes I’m sure you don’t think about that at all.

rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:38

[quote TheVampiresWife]@rrhuth While I completely agree that provision for DA help is dire in the UK, it's an absolute fact that if victims are left alone with their abusers for months on end violence will increase. It would be true even if provision was excellent.

Have you ever lived with a manipulative, violent partner? Can you imagine how they might use lockdown as an opportunity to increase their campaign of abuse? Many abusers forbid victims from seeing friends or family so they can continue their abuse away from what they see as prying eyes. Lockdown is a perfect way to do just that.

Yes, provision needs to improve. But it hasn't, and won't anytime soon. It's not 'false choice' - this is the situation we're in. Leave victims of abuse alone with their abusers and the abuse will worsen. Add to that the fact that many victims will have felt completely isolated from friends, family or channels of 'official' help and it's a recipe for disaster.

Many victims feel unable to seek help anyway. For people like them, no amount of extra provision will help. Not being shut up for months with the person terrorising them, however, might.[/quote]
This post is just hand wringing.

We could improve domestic violence provision tomorrow and more cuts are being made THIS YEAR.

Itisasecret · 09/12/2021 08:39

The whole Arthur issue, lockdown isn’t to blame. It’s the Tory govt and anyone who voted for them over the past 11 years.

They made no secrets of their plans to cut social care/judiciary/police/educational funding. Whilst reducing early help and closing all the sure start centres. Their so called enquiry really doesn’t need to go past the front door of 10 Downing Street.

The threshold for referral to SC is so high because the service is overstretched. An uncomfortable fact much like the fact we’ve used our children for herd immunity. Possibly (or not) storing up long term health complications. We don’t know but we’ve done it anyway. Much like many people talking about Arthur, voted for the policies which have put children like him at risk.

rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:39

@MarshaBradyo do not make personal comments about what I care about. You know nothing about what I do or what my family are dealing with.

MarshaBradyo · 09/12/2021 08:40

[quote rrhuth]@MarshaBradyo do not make personal comments about what I care about. You know nothing about what I do or what my family are dealing with.[/quote]
Why say that line then? Confused

It’s awful.

TheVampiresWife · 09/12/2021 08:41

@rrhuth

The reality is lockdown makes it worse which has turned into a convenient excuse for anti-lockdown types.

Anyone who has voted Tory in the last eleven years didn't give a shit about domestic violence or child neglect - they have cut all necessary services brutally. No point wringing your hands now.

For goodness sake. Being concerned about women and children in abusive situations and pointing out the irrefutable fact that the isolation of lockdown makes their situation worse doesn't make you an 'anti-lockdown type'. When will this ridiculous, pointless 'sides' nonsense end? Who does it help?

I've never voted Tory. I'd sooner eat spiders. I've lived with an abuser and in a refuge. DH works with vulnerable people in refuges. This is a topic that's personal to me and I feel incredibly strongly about.

I can't accept that one group of people should be protected at the expense of another. I just can't.

rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:41

Because it is true. People vote Conservative, who cut all the services vulnerable children need, and then pretend to care when children are harmed.

herecomesthsun · 09/12/2021 08:41

I'm not ok with the damage caused by lack of support for vulnerable children and families- so I don't vote Conservative.

I'm not ok with tens of thousands of needless deaths, so I am in favour of early lockdowns, ideally short ones to mitigate the effect on society. I don't think we can say there should "never" be another one as things stand, it depends how things pan out with cases, waves and likely numbers of deaths. I am not a "pile the bodies high" person.

These are separate issues.

TheVampiresWife · 09/12/2021 08:43

This post is just hand wringing

Nice way to dismiss someone's concerns.

I expect you consider yourself to be a caring, empathetic person, don't you? Hmm

Did you read the link I posted?

rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:44

I can't accept that one group of people should be protected at the expense of another. I just can't. If you really mean this then the reality is we needed lockdown + additional support for services.

If we need another lockdown, at some point in future, would you choose to save the additional children or the lives of those who will die? Or do you want better investement to try to do better in the round? I want better, that's all.

TheVampiresWife · 09/12/2021 08:45

@rrhuth why are you so convinced that everyone on this thread voted Conservative?!

rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:47

@TheVampiresWife

This post is just hand wringing

Nice way to dismiss someone's concerns.

I expect you consider yourself to be a caring, empathetic person, don't you? Hmm

Did you read the link I posted?

I can be but I am at the moment angry at the number of people who 'care' when there is a high profile case, or when it suits their covid position, but do not care enough to vote for the things that would help children in ongoing terrible situations.

I have some personal reasons for finding this very anger-inducing.

TheVampiresWife · 09/12/2021 08:51

@rrhuth as I've said, I have personal reasons for my position, too.

My point has nothing to do with any high profile case. It has to do with the shocking statistics regarding the increase of DA in lockdowns.

Please stop assuming people on this thread voted Tory. I'm a lifelong Labour member (disillusioned at the moment but that's another thread).

And it's not a 'covid position' (?!), it's an 'I'm concerned about the safety of victims of domestic abuse during lockdowns' position.

rrhuth · 09/12/2021 08:53

[quote TheVampiresWife]@rrhuth why are you so convinced that everyone on this thread voted Conservative?![/quote]
I am not convinced of any such thing.

I am certain there are many (in the country and on any forum) who vote for cuts to children's services whilst claiming to care about children.

And these days there are many who use their concern for children as justification for not tackling covid.

I hope we never have another lockdown, but if you are happy with the state of children's situations pre-lockdown and only bothered about the extra percentage that lockdown caused, that makes no sense to me.

Happypootle · 09/12/2021 08:54

rruth I will happily listen to different opinions but I do dislike the way you conflate lockdown views with party politics. That is very simplistic and also inaccurate. I am a lifelong labour voter. I absolutely agree that public services have been decimated by the tories. But the lockdown thing is a separate issue because not only the rules in place but also the 'project fear' aspect prevented people from both seeking help and providing it. You will find many on the left who oppose strong lockdowns (I work with lots of them) because they have seen the damage caused. It's not necessarily outright abuse but poverty, misery, neglect, lack of access to education. I believe if we need further measures to tackle covid these should never again include banning family members from visiting each other, frontline services working from home, or schools being closed to most children. I don't believe any of those things should ever be reinstated and I am not a tory and never will be.

herecomesthsun · 09/12/2021 08:56

It's interesting that so much has been made of the mental health of children/ domestic violence issues etc- in the context of opposing restrictions which people find unpalatable for other, completely unrelated reasons.

Often - and I am not saying this pertains to anyone on this thread- the newfound champions of mental health and abused children etc have not done anything at all prior that involved effort and/or financial input to help these causes.

So it looks like a pretext, as though these individuals are using human suffering as an easy argument to further their own interests.

Not saying, of course, that anyone on this thread is doing this.

But I can understand the origin of some of the questioning responses to this line of thought.