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Original poster

Anyone agree? Re. Children in lockdown

214 replies

Sorehandsandfeet · 14/02/2021 16:45

Now, I am aware that I am not speaking for everyone but I have spoken to a few people who have the same opinion. Before I get flamed, I understand that there are those living below the poverty line that don't have the resources for this lifestyle. I also know that there are some children who are not in the position to fully access education in lockdown due to poverty or neglect. However, I do think this applies to many.
Before lockdown many children had very busy lives with very little down time. After school there were all the extra curriculars,such as dancing, music, sports etc. Then there were the weekend competitions, matches etc. Alot of children I know pretty much had school, activity, dinner, homework and bed. Weekends were busy. Not only that but they were expected to excel academically also.
In my personal opinion, this high stress lifestyle was as damaging to the mental health of this generation as the lack of formal school is now.
Some children are finally being allowed to chill out at home with their families. Let's not be naive, most older children/ teens are still in contact with their friends via devices. Most are receiving 'some' education. I know it is substandard compared to being in class but it is still going ahead. Parents who wfh now have more time without all the running, ferrying children from one activity to another and stress of having to fit everything in. In some ways some children may have improved mental health/self esteem without all the pressure and competition.

OP posts:
DelurkingAJ · 14/02/2021 16:47

Disagree. My DC did swimming, dance and Cubs. They miss them horribly and all’s just don’t cut the mustard for keeping them entertained and active.

DelurkingAJ · 14/02/2021 16:47

Walks even nots all’s!

ToastandJamandTea · 14/02/2021 16:49

Disagree. My dc are suffering from the lack of physical activities and clubs. They have put on weight and are lethargic, anxious when they have to interact with others and just don't have the same motivation that has before.

Snowdrop30 · 14/02/2021 16:50

I always thought overscheduling my DS was bad for him (has SEN, needs down time). He misses the couple of things he did weekly though

tearsandtiaras · 14/02/2021 16:50

disagree . not all activities are a pressure to children or competition

EmergencyHydrangea · 14/02/2021 16:52

You do understand that even people who don't live below the poverty line don't have the resources for their children to do activities everyday? In the real world most people are not actually crashingly middle class

SaltyAF · 14/02/2021 16:52

Nah, we're bored now. I was thinking the other day that I kind of miss Saturday gymnastics.

hahaboink · 14/02/2021 16:55

@Sorehandsandfeet

Now, I am aware that I am not speaking for everyone but I have spoken to a few people who have the same opinion. Before I get flamed, I understand that there are those living below the poverty line that don't have the resources for this lifestyle. I also know that there are some children who are not in the position to fully access education in lockdown due to poverty or neglect. However, I do think this applies to many. Before lockdown many children had very busy lives with very little down time. After school there were all the extra curriculars,such as dancing, music, sports etc. Then there were the weekend competitions, matches etc. Alot of children I know pretty much had school, activity, dinner, homework and bed. Weekends were busy. Not only that but they were expected to excel academically also. In my personal opinion, this high stress lifestyle was as damaging to the mental health of this generation as the lack of formal school is now. Some children are finally being allowed to chill out at home with their families. Let's not be naive, most older children/ teens are still in contact with their friends via devices. Most are receiving 'some' education. I know it is substandard compared to being in class but it is still going ahead. Parents who wfh now have more time without all the running, ferrying children from one activity to another and stress of having to fit everything in. In some ways some children may have improved mental health/self esteem without all the pressure and competition.
Parents wfh have more time!!!! Ha ha ha ha. Please do come visit my house where I’m trying to look after and homeschool 2 young kids at the same time as dealing with a high pressure job wfh and show me where this time is 🤣🤣🤣
Tholeonagain · 14/02/2021 16:56

No, they need to interact with other children/ young people in person, not just on-line, for proper social and emotional development. I can’t pretend properly with my nine year old like she does with her friends. My eleven year old is missing his sport desperately and physically it’s bad for him. We are more fortunate than most but it’s still rubbish.

OhDear2200 · 14/02/2021 16:59

Ummm no, would I rather my child playing football twice a week, tennis and swimming or staying at home seeing no one, playing computer games with the occasional walk?

I know which one I think is more healthy.

Frazzled2207 · 14/02/2021 17:00

Disagree. I do think that to some extent 'downtime' has been useful for the kids, but we get that in school hols anyway. Other than a period in the autumn they've basically had it for a year now. Am very worried about my 5 year old's mental health. He's ok in himself but just wants cuddles with me all the time. I really can't imagine sending him back to school and his usual sporting activities right now. Just hope that being very young, he's got plenty of time to bounce back.

Regardless of his actual education, I think the lack of opportunities for him to play with other children for a big chunk of the last year is an absolute disgrace.

I do agree that having a 'full timetable' of extra curricular activities is not ideal. But most children just do two or three things max after school, not loads.

But you are U to say that parents who WFH have 'more time'. Parents that WFH have to WFH AND home-educate their kids. It's bloody murderous.

CKBJ · 14/02/2021 17:00

Evident at DP school many children from yrR upwards would be in breakfast club for 730am, go to school then after school until 6pm. Several children commented about this on their return to school in September after the last lockdown. School conducted a well-being survey, children also commented on less pressure due to lack of after school activities. A good percentage said they liked seeing their parents more and enjoyed the extra time together. A fear that was shared by some children was things would go back to how they were with parents too busy to spend time with them. 99% were pleased to be back to school. This well-being survey results were shared with parents via a newsletter hence how I know about it.

SeldomFollowedIt · 14/02/2021 17:00

I agree to an extent. SO many were ridiculously overscheduled. Problem is now they are massively underscheduled. As with all things in life it’s just balance.

I have three and with work/swimming/dancing/football I didn’t have time to breathe. I won’t be going back to all that.

Useruseruserusee · 14/02/2021 17:01

I do agree that life was a bit too fast paced before. My children are 6 and 3 and when life goes back to ‘normal’, I think we will schedule less and spend more days with no plans at all.

Avaganda · 14/02/2021 17:02

One of my DCs thrives on being kept busy and would wish for more hours in the day so he could do every activity under the sun. He is really struggling in lockdown.
Another DC prefers to be at home and that's fine with us. We've never forced him to do any activities he doesn't want to do.
Youngest DC is still a bit small to do activities but also likes to be kept busy.
All kids are different but I think the vast majority of kids I've seen at clubs want to be there, and I've heard from their parents that they are really miserable without their activities during lockdown.

Moomoolandmoomooland · 14/02/2021 17:04

I agree with you in that it has been nice to realise that the daily chasing our tails was neither necessary nor beneficial. I wasn't a massive one for clubs etc to begin with though.

I totally disagree with you that I as a parent now have more time. I now have to fit homeschooling two DC in with full time work. I can't fit that into the couple of hours they used to do activities in.

Mine are also not at the age where they have phones to contact their friends, so they are missing out on that.

There is a balance to be had. Slowing down is good but not to a complete standstill!

If this is moaning about schools reopening, the hotspot for transmissions is actually hospitals, not schools

audweb · 14/02/2021 17:04

Disagree. My 8 year old is stuck in the flat with just me working full time. she didn’t do a ton of activities but we spent weekends with friends and family, she got to see other children, we were out and about in parks and museums and activities. Things are not an improvement - you know what my kid misses most about school? The before/after school club where she just got to play with lots of other kids every day. Not every kid has siblings to hang out with, some during lockdown see no other children.

TheKeatingFive · 14/02/2021 17:06

Totally unreasonable. It was within people’s gift to reduce their activities if they thought they were too much, they didn’t need a lockdown to do that.

My little boy is really missing his football and swimming. He loved learning new skills, the camaraderie, the discipline of the class, his friends. I’m so sad he’s missing out on all this.

RuleWithAWoodenFoot · 14/02/2021 17:09

I'm going to jam my child's time with stuff when we can. Working from home with a 6 year old just means that 6 year old watches TV for 7 hours some days. I can't wait until she can get back to swimming, gymnastics and dance lessons. She misses them.

poppycat10 · 14/02/2021 17:09

I think a lot of people did force their kids to do too many activities. But there's a balance to be struck and we're now at the other extreme (and in my view for no good reason - outside exercise in small groups creates minimal risk). We may not be able to return to large dance classes etc for a bit but some councils have closed playgrounds (despite government guidance) and outdoor gym equipment (apparently in my area it's ok to touch a swing but not an outdoor cross-trainer - who knew the virus was so clever?) and tennis/golf not being allowed is stupid too. Ditto outdoor swimming pools (maybe not this week when it has been so cold but some are heated).

Certainly a lot of parents like competitive stress and go on about being so busy with "life admin" (translation: paying the odd bill) and all the kids' birthday parties and no doubt pass this stress onto the kids so some are probably enjoying spending loads of time with their books or more likely their xbox rather than being driven from pillar to post.

But I would like my son to be able to get back to his athletics. In normal times he would have had a residential training week this week.

devildeepbluesea · 14/02/2021 17:09

I'm not sure I could disagree with your post more if I tried.

My daughter has suffered physically, emotionally, socially and educationally. All this pandemic has done has taken away 15% of her life so far. And as for suggesting that as I WFH I have more time...words fail me.

RuleWithAWoodenFoot · 14/02/2021 17:11

Before lockdown we made sure our only child had some kid company every single day. It's vital. When we were in the Nov lockdown, we put her in after school club so she could have some (slightly more) unstructured play with other kids instead of coming home to watch TV alone.

BikeRunSki · 14/02/2021 17:11

Disagree. My dc miss their sports and Cubs/Scouts. Neither of them had a super packed schedule, and before Covid we had a good balance of active time and down time. No it’s just hours of nothingness.

nicknamehelp · 14/02/2021 17:12

In May I did think it was nice life had slowed down a bit for us all but now we all dc included want to get back to activities we love and miss.

HexWitch · 14/02/2021 17:12

Disagree. DC need proper social interaction even if they don't do schedules extracurricular activities. Mine are gaining weight and anxious when they do have to interact with people. And no, daily walk/bike ride just doesn't cut it when normally they'd be at swimming, Jumparooz, and out and about with friends and family at the weekend.