The BESH 30s TTC thread in the world EVER - 2010

[CUNextTuesday]

C'mon girls, this is the year. We will form a circle and concentrate hard on diffment.

Meanwhile, David and Jenson have popped the corks and are pouring out the Bellinis. Truckle of stilton anyone?

Scorpette!!! My Moleskine notebook, tattered copy of Seven Types of Ambiguity, shredded Roget and obsession with rephrasing cliches so they don't ACTUALLY look as if someone else has ever used them but are in reality the same words only very slightly rearranged - ALL OF THESE THINGS BID YOU GOOD E'EN!

Ar, both submitting autumn AAAAAARGH. I've written the 95 thousand word novel and am now re-writing it. Yes, that's what happens. No, I didn't know. The 30 thousand word academic thesis is currently three sentences hastily emailed to my co-superviser. You know what you need under these circumstances, to really get the old brain and critical faculties chugging over nicely? PREG-HEAD, that's what. Pass me the lithium.

This thread has saved the latest feeble remnants of what passes for sanity. Chief among the reasons for delaying motherhood ten years into marriage has been a seething hatred of mothers. If these bitches are broody, the whole business is dignified.

Ps My belly button hurst. Google says appendicitis. My only thought was fuck that, I can't go to hospital, I have shagging with intent to undertake. Mind you, doggy-style would mean the stitches wouldn't get ripped right?

Ead does your belly button feel like it's being tugged yanked from inside?

If so, I have no idea what it means, but I did try to pass it off as a preg symptom while 2WOOFLing in early October. Google said appendicitis. My body eventually said 'twas nothing and it went away. No BFP that month. But there was one the next...

Not much help really.

Curly - yup, that's just it - and very tender to touch there too...weird, actually utterly round the belly button. If there was any chance of updiffment I'd've been convinced it was a symptom...

It does help as it means it'll hopefully bugger off. I'm wondering if it's related to ditching my entirely adolecent fondness for laxatives and switching to All-Bran.

Sigh! Everthing in life comes down to shit or babies in the end.

Oh - sorry, satellite delay there: only just cottoned on to your BFP, for which: CONGRATULATIONS, and a chipped teacup of scotch sloshed in your general D.!

Jebus - I wasn't looking for BFP congrats (but thanks!) Just trying to show the tenuous links I was making

I have never experienced anything like it before or since. A most strange sensation. Of course, I was thinking (if not saying) that I was diffed and miscarrying. Because, of course, a tiny BOC was going to be able to exert that sort of force on my naval Seriously though, I sympathise. As I remember it was what I imagined having a belly ring yanked would be like, but from the inside - ouch. Here, drink some of that Scotch you slushed my way and feel better. (very apt choice of tipple for one of the thread's Jocks. Although I expect medee is more partial to a "wee draiy sherraiy" )

Ach well, nice to be patted on the head! (Actually...'twixt you & I & every other bugger reading this ... for so many years I've just thought "YEAH? AND?" when people get duffed up, it's weird doing a massive volte face and wanting to head-pat. WHO AM I? I'm sure I don't know.

I think I'll have a warm bath and then some sloshings. Bound to help OH GOD I DID ONE!

Woo hoo.....

Did anyone notice the world come to an end??

And a big FUCK YAY woop woop for beshie. and vag glad you okay. And welcome edbutt

Although actually ead if you hate mothers we possibly are not going to get on too well...

Fuckit. No need to POAS here. The merest thought of buying one was enough to bring the Droid and it's army of little back nerve twanging droidy friends straight on.

Bollocks. And the play I went to see tonight was rubbish, even though Tamsin Grieg, who I have a total lesbian crush on, was in it.

I hope this helps.

cameltoe POAS! POAS! POAS!

ginhag ach, I have my reasons! Round these here parts the chi-chi cafes are seething with women using their Bug-a-Boos to shove outta the way anyone who hasn't got four children called Portia dressed in matching Boden. And all the mothers in my family say things like 'ickle wickle piggle piggle poo-poo done a naughty waughty piddle did he?' at a pitch so high all the dogs in the neighbourhood start howling.

muser Tamsin's my beeyotch. Get your own.

weedy Are you living in leafy West London, then? I can barely get a coffee round here without tripping over some dreadful yummy mummy.

And I think you'll find Tamsin's my beeyotch.

I also have a bugaboo

s'right eadie I am fucking omnipresent

Ah well - come to the other place an tell us more

ski I am on CD27 and spotting. If I POAS it will just tell me that I iz barren. Although at least that might make droid commence.

I better be barren, anyhoo. Otherwise I will be having a red wine baby.

Incidentally tamsin is actually vag

headbutts to muser

camel it was good quality wine love,so that's fine. Means the baby will be all sophisticated (it's tequila you have to worry about...ahem)

I have a bugaboo as well. But it's for my baybee, not for me.

ginhag do you also sit in Cafe Nero complaining loudly about the difficulty of finding a decent au pair these days and tetchily explaining to the barista why you and all your brood can only drink soy milk?

Please say yes!

Actually it's not West London - but parts of it THINKS it is.

What is this other place of which you speak? Is it .... (and here our heroine lowers her voice to an awestruck whisper): is it VisageLivre?

camel wouldn't a red wine baby have, like, a really strong heart and similar?

gin Ah well, that's alright then. I shall name it Malbec. Actually, that's not a bad name...

And BIG HELLO to ginhag how are things?

beshie glad you're here...I'll be offline due to being very very busy (I fucking hope!) so good to catch you now so I can say hooooo-fucking-raaaaay!

Will mail you soon as I can. Now you can wear the dress!!!

that will never stop being funny.

ooooh ooooh, eadwacer I complain loudly about my cleaner and would love to sit around on my bum all day drinking coffee. Do I get a nice big house on a leafy street? Do I? Do I?

Oui, c'est VisageLivre...

Tell me more about last night gin and co! Did omniiggs make it? Did vagpanic show?
I want to know!

(and I have to spend three hours in the dullest of dull meetings from 10am so please liven up my day!)