Just MC'd .. Come and join us for the long haul (newbies always welcome!) - Vol 3

[LeeWT]

Hi all, old and new, this is the thread where all moaning, pieces of tmi, discussions and virtual cups of tea and biscuits come together to keep us sane .. or at the least insane together!

mrR thank you for the update and wishing mrsR a speedyrecovery

just1more, I am so sorry to hear your news. really really hope it works out for you.

alba yes it was me, it happened 3 times, each time after sex, the following morning, and each time a red gush, not old brown. (have given up apologising for TMI on here ) No reason, everything else fine and only happened those 3 times, sorry I can't be more help.

alba I'm sorry to hear you're having such a difficult time. Your last post reminded me of myself so much, I feel I have to reply.

First, regarding the cyst: Apparently the corpus luteum from which the egg came that got you pregnant, sometimes turns into a cyst. So in a sense they could well both be right. I had a cyst when they scanned me after my MC and they said it was nothing to worry about. Now at my 12-week scan they again found a cyst (in the same place - me wondering if it's the same one?) and again, apparently nothing to worry about.

But mostly what I wanted to say, I felt exactly the same about not wanting to go through the whole thing TWO more times before anybody started looking for causes or doing things about it... so to an extent I took things into my own hands. I just bought baby aspirin without prescription - I know the science on it actually helping is ambivalent, but I figured it might help and wouldn't hurt - easy choice. Regarding the progesterone, I also thought I might have a problem there, so immediately when I got my BFP, I started drinking lady's mantle tea (alchemilla vulgaris). This herb is a natural gestagen (progesterone-precursor), and people have made pretty good experiences in taking it instead of progesterone.
It is right that they stop giving progesterone at around 12 weeks - and there is actually a reason: That's the time when the placenta takes over the progesterone production, so it doesn't matter anymore if your corpus luteum is not quite up to the job.
Anyway, I'm no doctor or specialist so please think and decide for yourself, or go talk to a herbal fertility specialist, before you do as I did... . That said, for me it was SO important to feel that I was doing SOMETHING... instead of just waiting for what I felt would be inevitable. So even if it didn't 'really' help, it helped enormously. Don't let anyone deprive you of this - you need any support you can get, even if it is just tricking yourself into thinking that you are doing something about it.
Good luck.

And best of luck for everyone else too! It's good to see the thread busy and full of support for each other... and sad at the same time.

MrRigby thanks for updating, please convey my best wishes to MrsRigby, hope she gets better soon. And please do tell her to join us on the grad thread whenever she feels like it
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/812791-Totally-39-s-GRADS-lets-handhold-thru-this
(equall y for all other recent BFPs of course!)

Thanks for all the responses, you've all helped me feel like I'm not actually going mad.
Feeling a bit better this evening, DH is being very kind and helpful, I almost wonder if he's stalking me on here and realised quite how upset I am!! Meita, all that advice is fantastic, thank you so much, I'm going to start looking into it. I'm absolutely sure it's all so much easier when we feel like we're doing something positive. But as for the cyst -- the report from my 7.4 scan said corpus luteum seen, right ovary. This is left... maybe after what Hippy says too I can think really positive and assume I either just have, or am just about to ovulate? Unfortunately really not feeling up to SWI this evening...

Just1more, really to read your news, though there is still hope with ISCI

I just read this... I am amazed at the strength of a woman who kept trying 18 times! Uplifting to read she finally has her miracle baby news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/sussex/8522575.stm

Lurking, depressed and hormonal [lurk face. Where's that damn lurk face?]

Hi Ladies, sorry haven't been back properly been busy with work & half term entertaining and have also been waiting for AF to come back after erpc. Had a bleed on Sunday which then trailed off to nothing much but then AF seemed to arrive properly (so to speak) today - shall I count today as the first day or sunday? Then will finally update my stats from pending - yay!

The reg who did my erpc told me we should wait 2 to 3 periods before ttc again but I have read that it is ok to just crack on after 1? Have any of your been told this? I have had 2 mc (one late & one missed) in the last 8 months and I have put on loads of weight and think maybe I should shed this before I ttc but I just want to get going as soon as I can and bollocks to the weight!!!!

Sorry to read that some of you are having a rough time with it, lots of love and hugs to you muse & just1more and any other ladies that are having a really pants time and I have missed off (((((BigHugs))))) Wishing a speedy recovery to MrsRigby too.

Off work for a few days now so will be able to keep up with you all!

xx

big hug to Unbuffy x

Glad you're feeling a bit better alba.

Sorry to hear your news just1more, I don't know your circumstances so wont comment further (for risk of saying something dumb). All i will say is that it's horrid for you to be so sad - good luck for the future.

I went to my GP today for a sicknote and talked to her about how I was feeling. She is such a lovely doc. She even got choked up for me - bless her.

She didn't seem to think the thin lining that i had before the bfp was necessarily to blame because all was going so well. My blood test at 6 weeks showed a good level of hgh etc.

She said that in her opinion this was not a problem with 'Hippy' (except she said my real name). She just thinks the embryo wasn't quite right. However, she agreed immediately to refer me to a different consultant who can check a few things out ready for when we/if we decide to ttc again. I feel much calmer now.

I said that i felt guilty that perhaps I should have gone for an early scan and if the lining was thin at that point they might have given me something to thicken it, she replied that there isn't a lot of evidence that that actually works.

I do feel that my DH is right that we need to concentrate on doing all we can to make the next time work and not spend our time saying what if what if.

I will look into the things that meita suggested too.

hiya sorry can i join?
Found out at the weekend I was pregnant with my second child, he/she was unplanned but a very much wanted baby. Since the weekend, however, I have been discharging brown mucus/sludge and yesterday i passed a clot which looked like a small bean (i would have been around the 6 week mark). I had hospital confirm my pregnancy was ending and i have been bleeding brown since late afternoon (sorry for TMI) I was also told what i had passed yesterday was the embryo. I am devastated, at first i was shocked to be pregnant again (DD only 8 months) but DH and I were very excited and happy but now I feel very low...only thing keeping me sane is my lovely smart DD and my supportive DH. One thing we have got out of this experience is that we want to TTC again and I am a firm believer in my faith and fate and if this baby was meant to be my pregnancy would have continued.

I am hoping to obtain support from you lovely ladies who have also gone thro this pain and heartache and also support other people who join the thread. xx

Allthe8s they tell you this because it's easier to date the pregnancy but my gp said there was no reason not to start trying again immediately.

Lauraloo it does get better but it goes in stages. Don't expect that it will get progressively better. There will be days and events that knock you down and you just have to start again.

thanks tigger will be taking one day at a time for the time-being...got to prep for an interview tomorrow morning with this on my mind...so suppose I better get off MN and do some prep x

Just1, so sorry to hear your news.

Alba, sorry to hear about your mistery bleed too.

Hello everyone else. It is really hard to namecheck everyone on this thread, there are just so many goings on.

I've still got a lot of catching up to do, ~I've not been lurking on this thread for a couple of weeks because I've been trying to forget that I've had a miscarriage.

I thought I was feeling a bit more back to normal and getting over it but now my period is due and all I'm getting is (tmi alert) brown sludge. Is this what to expect? I was hoping for a normal period then to try and get back to ttc.

That's another thing. I need to track my cycle in better ways than cm tracking. I just haven't been able to detect when I ovulate. The pee on tests don't show it up and I bought a thermometer too ( no results) and one of those microscopes too, nope - can't even see anything in that. So I can't really post proper stats for the list.

Hey all.
Sorry in advance about the forthcoming miss jointed ramblings, my head, is somewhat up my arse.
Got a call in work today from the EPU.
They said that they have had the Histology/cytogenetics(?) tests results back today from my MMC nearly 8 weeks ago.
It was a Molar Pregnancy.
And they are quite concerened
I've got to go back in for another scan next Thurs and possibly have another ERPC.
They only do the Molar clinic once a week so it's going to be a long week.
Kinda answers my question about going 43 days without so much as a coo-eee from AF though.
Something strange is happening and it ain't good.
Looks like I'll be dropping off any TTC lists for a long while... possibly 12 months.
I know a little about Molar but really don't want to google too much as it's scaring the shit out of me and until Thurs I don't know exactly how stuffed we are.
My Fab MIL is doing all that for me and drip feeding me info.
I was saying to her to on the phone that within the hour, the rate she's researching Who/Why/Where she'll be able to provide a full dossier on the majority of LWH's staff and how many pets they have.

I was just getting my head round the fact that maybe having the steriods possibly stopped the NK cells and it was "just bad luck" that the 6th MMC happened and it was unconnected.... but I'd definitely get steriods next time(which did work) and I'd get my baybee next time.
But I can't.

I want to scream.
I feel feckin sick

MrsG - don't know what to say - don't know much about molars, but am online so I wanted to acknowledge your post. Can't imagine the shock it was to get that call - please feel free to scream - a lot. Take care will be thinking of you

Gi1da hippy icedlemonmuffin Slimyak & Laura (think that's everyone!) sorry to hear you need to join the thread, but welcome -it's a good place to be upside leftways as you say! NHS care is so patchy and your comment have brought back some unresolved feelings of rage against a junior house doctor I saw.I promised myself I'd compose some "constructive" feedback for him. Had an MMC - waited 2 hours to be seen in EPU and his first words to me were "so - you're here to book an ERPC?" I nearly decked him. after about 5 mins, when he's asked me if I would agree to tissues being taken for medical research he said, "oh, by the way, sorry for your loss" - what do they teach them in med school [goes off muttering to myself, must write that letter...]

muser really sorry to hear your news - thinking of you and let us know how you are.

Alba it's so frustrating not knowing what's going on - hoping it's all ok for you

Just1more -thinking of you

Dirtgirl - urgh - I'm EXACTLY the same. If WTF proves to be a normal cycle then I'm due tomorrow, and I'm just getting brown sludge stuff - was trying to kid myself it was implantation bleed but think not [deluded, moi?!]
haven't been able to pinpoint any ovulation this month, used sticks for the first time and tried to monitor CM, but no real signs to go on.

I have had a totally crap day today - nothing better than breaking down and crying in front of the nine people you manage. The snotty, hiccuping "i'm fine, i'm fine" was very attractive, all piggy red eyes and blotchiness.
Too much going on at work - head decided to explode, and it's probably monster PMT too. Very mixed feelings about AF possibly on it's way, half pleased things appear to be on a regular cylce, half devastated I'm not PG, and on top of that mourning the fact all over again that I'm not pg. I should have been starting to feel kicks this week - and instead I'm drinking too much red wine and ranting on MN
Still can't get that scan image out of my mind

now, before I finish the bottle anyone want a night cap? [passes round bottle] will stop rambling now and go and POAS

Hello Cheepz- CONGRATS!!!!! You're a proper grad!

AF turned up on Sunday - just hadn't got round to changing my info on the list:

MrsGazebo TTC#1 UCL27 cycle 1 CD43
Underneaththestream TTC#1 UCL ? cycle WTF CD36
clareanna TTC#2 UCL35 cycle WTF CD35
Moofold ttc#2 UCL~33 cycle1 CD30
lucyt66 TTC#1 UCL34 cycle 2 CD27
northlondonchoclover TTC#1 UCL28 cycle WTF CD23
Unbuffy TTC#2 UCL? WTF CD23
Liahgen66 TTC#6 UCL26 cycle 1 (post mc) CD21
RunForTheHills TTC#1 UCL30 cycle 14 CD17
yogamat TTC#2 UCL? cycle WTF CD17
vivcliquot TTC#1 UCL27 cycle 3 CD16
sunburntats TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 2 CD15
Tetleytea TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 3 CD15
Barrenbrook TTC#1 UCL 25-28 cycle 11 CD14
Albadetamble TTC#2 UCL25 cycle WTF CD14
LittleMiss72 TTC#1 UCL28 cycle WTF CD13
Hopefully TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 3 CD12
NoShouting TTC#5 UCL? cycle 1 CD11
Curlylox TTC #3 UCL 28 cycle WTF CD11
Goodluckbear TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 1 CD9
Zayja TTC#1 UCL24-26 cycle 11 CD9
Tigger15 TTC#2 UCL26 cycle 9 CD6
Tigerbear TTC#1 UCL26 cycle 7 CD5
SarahMumtoAlex TTC#2 UCL28 Cycle 6 CD3

PENDING STATS
westyorkshiregirl TTC#? UCL? cycle? CD?
dirtgirl TTC#? UCL? cycle? CD?
allthe8s TTC#? UCL? cycle? CD?
Polyanna TTC#6 UCL27 WTF CD?
Gi1da TTC #1 UCL? cycle WTF CD?
Malteser1981 TTC#? UCL28 cycle WTF CD?
icedlemonmuffin TTC#2 UCL? cycle? CD?
slimyak TTC#2 UCL? cycle? CD?

GRADUATES
amyboo
totally
hoops997 BFP 11 July 2009
Stressy BFP 22nd August 2009
becky78 BFP 4th September 2009
LittleOneMum BFP 7th September 2009
Waitingisntfun BFP 19th September 2009
Chamois BFP 7th October 2009
Apples BFP 9th November 2009
Meita BFP 10th December 2009
CakeandFineWine BFP 27th December 2009
boodleboot BFP 2nd January 2010
Jollster BFP 10th January 2010
LeeWT BFP 21st January 2010
TFLS BFP 22nd January 2010
Louisesh BFP 22nd January 2010
MrsRigby BFP 27th January 2010
TheKurgan BFP 30th January 2010
effilump BFP 8th February 2010
Sarahlou8 BFP 10th February 2010
samanthab123 BFP 10th February 2010
Cheepz BFP 16th February 2010

Clareanna - sorry you've had a rubbish day. Big hug!

MrsG, so so sorry to read your news, what a shock and such a long wait. How does it take them so long to come back to you with the results?
I only discovered that they routinely check for this when the Dr told me yesterday that the good news was that mine wasn't... I thought if your baby had developed at all it couldn't be anyway? What an awful call to get at work. Best of luck with getting it dealt with and so sorry you have to wait so long now.

I'm up because I can't sleep... Thank god I have the anti-biotics to take... I'm now sure I have a bladder infection. Had I not had one before, and had the 'all ok' scan yesterday, I would be in major panic mode. As it is I necked all the painkillers I could, and am now trying to distract myself whilst they kick in. Agony. Can't get comfortable for more than 2 minutes... Wish the anti b's would hurry up and get working too...

Morning ladies, I hope the sun comes out today like on Wednesday - feel so much better when the sun is out and spring was looking like it was just round the corner.

Sorry for your bad news lauraloo09 and that you find yourself here with us I hope we can provide the support you need. Take time for yourself it will get better x MrsGazebo I am sorry to read your news, it must have been awful to get the news at work. I am glad you are getting good support from MIL. Lots of love and hugs to you x Clareanna I am sorry you had a shit day yesterday and I hope you have a better day today. xAlba I hope your antibiotics kick in today and your are feeling better x Dirtgirl I had this too for 2/3 days but then AF kicked in properly yesterday (had erpc on 23rd Jan). Thanks Tigger I know I should wait 2 and I will as much as the waiting pains me! I will count from Sunday so have updated my stats.

Allthe8s TTC#2 UCL28 cycle1 CD5
MrsGazebo TTC#1 UCL27 cycle 1 CD43
Underneaththestream TTC#1 UCL ? cycle WTF CD36
clareanna TTC#2 UCL35 cycle WTF CD35
Moofold ttc#2 UCL~33 cycle1 CD30
lucyt66 TTC#1 UCL34 cycle 2 CD27
northlondonchoclover TTC#1 UCL28 cycle WTF CD23
Unbuffy TTC#2 UCL? WTF CD23
Liahgen66 TTC#6 UCL26 cycle 1 (post mc) CD21
RunForTheHills TTC#1 UCL30 cycle 14 CD17
yogamat TTC#2 UCL? cycle WTF CD17
vivcliquot TTC#1 UCL27 cycle 3 CD16
sunburntats TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 2 CD15
Tetleytea TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 3 CD15
Barrenbrook TTC#1 UCL 25-28 cycle 11 CD14
Albadetamble TTC#2 UCL25 cycle WTF CD14
LittleMiss72 TTC#1 UCL28 cycle WTF CD13
Hopefully TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 3 CD12
NoShouting TTC#5 UCL? cycle 1 CD11
Curlylox TTC #3 UCL 28 cycle WTF CD11
Goodluckbear TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 1 CD9
Zayja TTC#1 UCL24-26 cycle 11 CD9
Tigger15 TTC#2 UCL26 cycle 9 CD6
Tigerbear TTC#1 UCL26 cycle 7 CD5
SarahMumtoAlex TTC#2 UCL28 Cycle 6 CD3

PENDING STATS
westyorkshiregirl TTC#? UCL? cycle? CD?
dirtgirl TTC#? UCL? cycle? CD?
Polyanna TTC#6 UCL27 WTF CD?
Gi1da TTC #1 UCL? cycle WTF CD?
Malteser1981 TTC#? UCL28 cycle WTF CD?
icedlemonmuffin TTC#2 UCL? cycle? CD?
slimyak TTC#2 UCL? cycle? CD?

GRADUATES
amyboo
totally
hoops997 BFP 11 July 2009
Stressy BFP 22nd August 2009
becky78 BFP 4th September 2009
LittleOneMum BFP 7th September 2009
Waitingisntfun BFP 19th September 2009
Chamois BFP 7th October 2009
Apples BFP 9th November 2009
Meita BFP 10th December 2009
CakeandFineWine BFP 27th December 2009
boodleboot BFP 2nd January 2010
Jollster BFP 10th January 2010
LeeWT BFP 21st January 2010
TFLS BFP 22nd January 2010
Louisesh BFP 22nd January 2010
MrsRigby BFP 27th January 2010
TheKurgan BFP 30th January 2010
effilump BFP 8th February 2010
Sarahlou8 BFP 10th February 2010
samanthab123 BFP 10th February 2010
Cheepz BFP 16th February 2010

Oh MrsG, I'm so so sorry, my love. I can't imagine how anxious this must be making you, so I hope that you're doing as well as you can be and that you're getting lots of love and support from everyone (it sounds as though you are).

I know this is a completely futile thing to say, but just do everything you can to get through the days between now and Thursday and try to think positive - it may be that they've caught it early and that it can be easily resolved, so try not to torture yourself with the worst case scenarios.

Am sending you lots of love missus xx

Mrs G so sorry, and rubbish that you have to wait for tests. It's just all so bloody unfair. I've just been reading the mn mc campaign thread and balling my eyes out whilst at the same time getting enraged at all the horrible experiences. I also just had a friend ringing me with the line "oh well it wasn't meant to be". Yes it fecking was.

Oh ladies I am so sorry you are all going through this. It is a hope though to see the grads list here and I hope one day to be on it. Here are my stats if someone would be so kind to add when next published.
Ttc1 ucl28 cycle WTF cd 7 (is that right, bleeding started Saturday then mc sunday?)

I've been having a wobble because my bleeding seems to be stopping now, I thought I would be glad as I was sick of bleeding but now I feel sad and empty like it's all over and as if the pg never happened. Am dreading going back to my horrid job next week. sorry for moaning. Will get myself out into the garden and try to sort my head out by digging. Wishing you good days.

MrsG - so sorry to hear about what you're going through. Will be thinking of you over the next week - and sending virtual hugs.

Big hugs to everyone, especially those of you having a hard time right now.

I saw the article in the Evening Standard about the lady who's had 18 miscarriages, and taken 13 years to have a baby. It sounded so hard, I don't know how she managed. DH got back and asked..."did you see the Evening Standard tonight?". I said "yeah, I saw it". He goes "the sports section?" "Er no, the miscarriage article!" He thought it was positive as she got a baby in the end, I thought it sounded awful!!

xxxxxxxx

MrsG so sorry to hear about your sad news, took them long enough to tell you mind! Got me wondering now, will chase up the report from the DR's. Big Hugs to you! x

I'm off to a spa for afternoon tea, thanks good the bleeding has stopped however like Gi1da said I do kind of feel empty. Hugs for you to as I know the feeling

I'm a little nervous about ttc all over again, the more I read the more I think somethings wrong. I guess the best I can do is try and keep everything crossed for a second chance.

Oh .. little rant.. if one more person say's to me 'oh at least you know you can get pregnant quickly' I'll slap em!

Have a lovely Friday all x x x x

Hey Littlemiss - we should make a list of rubbish platitudes:

"at least you know you can get pregnant"
"it wasn't meant to be"
"well at least it wasn't a real baby" (I'm not kidding!)
"it's nature's way of dealing with it"

I've heard so many but my memory's gone blank. Thing is, I probably said similar sort of things before experiencing it myself. (Apart from "not a real baby" - why did she say that, the lunatic.) In fact, the nicest comment anyone made was that "I won't offer you any platitudes because there aren't any". Too true.

xxxxxxxxx

My personal favourite was one of my very best friends who told me over Christmas that I was, "Far luckier than a mutual friend, who tried for 12 months before she conceived her now DS, as she was worried she could get pregnant at all."

Right. So one mmc and one termination for a fatal chromosomal abnormality makes me luckier than someone who took 12 months to conceive a healthy child. Right-o.

I've come to realise people say this kind of shit because they don't know what else to say, but think saying something, anything, is better than saying nothing at all. Unless they've been through it, they cannot possibly understand, so I (nine times out of ten) can forgive their foot-in-mouth syndrome and just smile beatifically (while mentally slapping them, obv)

morning everyone.

Do you know I think as it comes up to the weekend it makes us all feel a bit shit.

MrsG I am so sorry to hear your news, I really hope it comes right for you very soon.

Gi1 it's very normal for the wobbles to catch up with you at odd times, just when you think you are ok, (ish obviously) it hits you ike a ton of bricks. Rant on here about whatever you like, we all know sadly how you feel.

viv people don't know what to say do they so instead they come out with something completely moronic. I would much rather they say, I am very sorry to hear your news, I really don't know what to say. Oh no much too easy.

littlemiss just get straight back on that horse. Youcan do this.

For anyone on any other ttc threads i will update on myself

Have had my niece staying and she had a small pg scare, ( i say scare as her baby is 11 wks )so she bought a twin pack. So here isthis bloody 2nd test, (hers neg btw) calling to me from the cupboard, so i caved and did it on weds night, (baring in mind period, if gonna be normal due Monday or maybe even Tuesday) There it was a line that was pale but easily seen at arms length

SO.. thinking could be left over hormones but kept it all the same bought FR yesterday morning and was completely neg, nada, nothing. Ok so this confirms my left over hormones etc.

well fr was bogof in boots so have 3!!! (I know I know) sitting in cupboard now, so did one this morning and there is the faintest of lines there!! . Appeared in time and coloured.

Am feeling bit emotional about it all and have to ring docs at 2pm to be seen this afternoon. Am gonna ask to be sent to epac for them to do blood to get confirmation one way or other. Am tentaively positive as it definately wasn't ther yesterday but Aaaggghhh.

Will update when I've seen doc.