TTC after early miscarriage

[RaisingCornishWildlings]

Morning!
So I sadly suffered an early miscarriage at 5w just over a fortnight ago.

We have 3 children already (6,4 and 19m) and I'm 40, hubby 47.

Lovely staff at EPU said crack on again as soon as I'm ready- and not to worry about having a period first.

I've always had pretty irregular cycles anyway and have never tracked ovulation (we have been very lucky and fallen pregnant super easily- and this was my first MC).

I think I have just ovulated (Sunday) which was 14 days since spotting (main bleed from miscarriage was Tues 11, Weds 12 Oct).

My symptoms were bloating on Fri and Saturday, and real drop in mood over the weekend (I've noticed this has happened a few times a couple of weeks before period since cycles started after DD was born), by yesterday my mood was much more stable again. On Sunday I had mild nausea and very mild cramping (more like little twinges).
We DTD Sunday night.

So have fingers crossed that something might have happened!

I noticed yesterday evening and today I'm peeing more than usual but apparently that can be a sign of ovulation too.

I'm going to be a crazy lady symptom
spotting for a fortnight now! Have a cervical screening booked for a week today (wondering if I should cancel it?!)

What's the earliest anyone has had symptoms after DTD that turned out to be early pregnancy? And how many DPO have you got a positive?

How are you doing @Holly0609 and @ThelastRolo20 thinking of you both x

Thank you everyone 😊 I'm genuinely okay, it's not even been three months since the 12 week miscarriage so just putting it all down to a crappy period.

I've taken what control I can and that helps. Going to book in a spa day/ meal out with my husband etc and really try and take a break mentally. My only focus right now though is getting to Tuesday and discussing treatment, I'm thinking I'll go for medical management.

@ThelastRolo20 you have a great outlook. I admire it! Sounds fab a spa day sounds like heaven right now, much deserved!

Did you have that last time? I had it and found it alright to be fair. X

@Claudiasaz I actually ended up naturally miscarrying the day after my 12 week scan - it was also very painless so I'm not too scared of the medical management. I'm glad it was okay for you, that's helpful to know as I've heard varying experiences x

Thank you @Claudiasaz 💗

And thank you everyone ☹️
I ended up being back in work for 5 mins after my lunch before someone asked if I was okay and I broke down crying 😭. Pulled myself together and went to see my manager to see if I can take annual leave and she said no so I told her what’s happened and they let me go ☹️
Now I’m torn what to do about work tomorrow 😭 I was off for 6 weeks after my MMC 3 months ago, and was off sick a week ago with a bad cold 🤣 so feel like I can’t go off sick again! But also don’t know how I’m going to be “ok” in work when I’m patient facing and we’re really short staffed and all I can think about is what’s currently happening to me 💔

The nurse rang me earlier and my HCG level was only 15 🥺. And I went to the loo about an hour after the phone call and had brown blood when I wiped so… the bleed will happen soon I’m guessing 💔

I’m not as upset as last time, I guess because last time was further along and was really dragged out. And I have been worried the last 2 days. But I am devastated. You’re right @Blueskies4 once you’ve seen that positive test it’s so hard 😞. I was so excited. I didn’t cope very well with my MMC at all, and that positive test was all I’ve wished for the last 3 months.

@ThelastRolo20 I’m glad you’re doing okay 💕. You’ve made me think about booking a spa day too! Definitely needed x

@Holly0609 I'm so sad for you both. Really not what I expected to sign back on and see. Gutted for you. I wouldn't feel bad if you need to take a few days off. They know what's happened. You're only human! Be gentle on yourself x

@Holly0609 im so sorry but I’m pleased you got some time off.
I’m a department manager in the NHS, I just took time off last week due to my own miscarriage.

I wouldn’t worry about ringing in sick. Anything pregnancy related including miscarriage should be treat as “pregnancy related sickness” which doesn’t trigger on a sickness policy.

hope you’re sorted and feeling better soon

@Ncl31 Thank you 🥺
Oh are you! I’m sorry about your miscarriage too 💔
Do you think it matters that I had pregnancy related sickness in October, and only 3 months later, go off sick again? Should that still be classed as pregnancy related sickness too?

I know a lot of people just think their period has come late with chemical pregnancies (I hate that word). But I had 5 days of thinking I was pregnant and I’ve been desperate since my miscarriage 😔 it’s so hard!
I’m hoping the bleeding properly starts tomorrow so I can just move on again x

@Claudiasaz thank you so much ☹️ x

@Holly0609 it doesn't matter that you were off for pregnancy related reasons last time, this absolutely still counts and will be exempt from any absence management procedures. We can all feel guilty about letting work "down", but our priorities must always be ourselves.

By not taking time out you'll end up taking longer to recover x

Oh @Holly0609 you poor poor love. I'm Heartbroken for you.
Sh*tty start to the new year.

Really really hope someone has some positive news soon, what CD are people on?
I'm dreading testing on Sunday (which will be 10DPO I think), as I know it's still early but I don't think I can keep myself away from
The pee sticks any longer 😂 I know it'll probably a BFN but even if it is a BFP it's going to trigger anxiety straight away and I'll be expecting constantly that it won't stick!

I am deffo feeing very premenstrual today- another day of reflux (and proper acid in my mouth tonight), very very gassy- been burping all day!, headache and lower back ache/
aching around my hips. And full of rage this afternoon with the kids (but that will be exacerbated by lack of sleep!)
All things that could be incoming AF or the start of something more positive.

@Holly0609 it absolutely would not matter in the slightest. It is still pregnancy related. No matter what.

You should get hold of a copy of your place of work’s policy. Ours is called “policy for parents”
it includes all things about time off, sickness etc even for fertility treatment.

i hope you’re feeling better soon, a loss is a loss no matter how early it is. They’re still your baby.

@RaisingCornishWildlings i’m 9dpo and couldn’t resist so did another test this morning there is a faint line. Trying not to get my hopes up but might go buy a FRER for tomorrow morning. This is the longest cycle I’ve had since the MC and based on pre MC cycle tomorrow I’d be 1 day late so we will see.

I threw my back out yesterday lifting the little one and it’s pushing my anxiety through the roof further as the first symptom of the loss was lower backache. Pregnancy, TWW, TTC they are all different after a loss 😢

Oh @Cat2022 that sounds promising- fingers crossed for you. I just did a test too- I a cheapie from Poundland or B&m or somewhere. And of course it was a stark negative and even though I know it was stupid to test so early, I feel even worse now and absolutely convinced it won't happen for me 😫

Deffo will hold off til Sunday earliest, Monday if I can keep myself away from the sticks!

After having random and long cycles before the MC, I've had a 34 then 28 day cycle so I don't even know when my period is due but I'm day 26 of my cycle so judging on last two months could be any time from Sunday / Monday to next weekend!!

One things for sure is that I'm feeling the effects of the Luthuli phase progesterone rise 😭

@mumsince2021 I've spoken to dr today and they don't think it's normal what I'm still experiencing fyi. So I'm getting checked out. Just wanted to let you know as know you're experiencing similar x

@Cat2022 sorry I missed this. Sounds promising fingers crossed for you!

It’s faint but it’s there (less sensitive test and not fmu)

@Claudiasaz my luteal phase has been shorter since the MC, was only 8 days last two cycles. I have read that taking vitamin c can help lengthen it but I’m not sure how true it is.

I see it ❤️
Been squinting at mine from this morning in the vain hope of spotting the merest shadow of a line, but Nada! Will try Sunday!

Ah that's interesting @Claudiasaz what did you tell them that they were concerned about? Do keep us posted as it's helpful to know what they can do!

@Cat2022 ohh that looks promising🤞 surely this time will have a good outcome. We need good news here, no more losses!

@Claudiasaz it's great you're being taken seriously by the doctor about your cycles. @Cat2022 I see it 🤩

Ladies - I've been down a Google rabbit hole (who can resist!). I know it's bad news but humour me....

So at the scan they saw an embryo with a 2.5mm measurement. Googling has shown massive variation in what should be seen at 5/6/7 weeks. A few say you can only see an embryo from 6 weeks, starting at 1mm placing me around 6+2 days, not 5+2 days (but sources vary as I say). I actually ovulated a couple days late in November due to the miscarriage, so when I went I'd have likely been 6.5 days. I'm clutching at straws I know and I'm content with the inevitable bad outcome so tell me I'm being ridiculous. But if you'd like to hop on my train of ridiculous thinking come on board! 😂

@ThelastRolo20 i don’t think you are completely clutching at straws. When I had my EPU ultrasound I was 2.1mm and they said that was bang on expected 6+2 but no heartbeat yet and even then they said that was normal and would just need to wait and see.

I went for an early private scan with my daughter and left in tears as the dates were off and it somehow made up a week between then and 12 week scan. Did they say what the next steps are for you this time?

@Cat2022 so bizarre that at 2.1mm they say to you that's 6+2 days, at my private scan I got told 2.5mm was 5+2! I'm getting scanned at EPU on Tuesday...no I don't know what to think

@Cat2022 I actually have a luteal phase of 12 days but spotted from 9 this month. Random. Trouble is there's no consistency for me since mc. And I've never had any of those issues before my mc had my two little ones with no problems. So super frustrating!

@mumsince2021 I told them about the spotting and irregular cycles, and that was it!

@ThelastRolo20 id expect them to maybe do another scan next week. How far along are you now? I didn't have to have another scan because of the baby being clearly big enough for heartbeat which I'm guessing happened with you last time. However I think when smaller there is usually a second scan offered in a weeks time? X

@Claudiasaz yes, at the 12 week scan there was no need. They won't classify it as a miscarriage without a heartbeat unless the baby measures at least 7mm (the things you learn!)

I have a scan on Wednesday at the EPU. I know what the outcome will be, but it's fun to dream!

@ThelastRolo20 honestly who knows what will happen I'll be thinking positively for you. You do hear stories like this happen. Let's hope it's the case for you! Keep nice and busy until next week xx