2023 TTC 35+

[VixFromThe6ix]

Hi everyone!!
Wanted to start another group thread for those TTC that are 35+.
When I was first trying, this group helped me a lot. We bonded and went through pains and celebrations together. I had two MCs over 2yrs of trying and lots of crying as I was typing many of my posts. Support helped... Especially at this age.
I had my first baby Jan 2022 and here we are now trying for baby #2.
I'll be 40 this summer!!!
Join me and share your story ☺️

@VixFromThe6ix that sounds so miserable I’m so sorry to hear your incontinence is that bad. I had a few accidents in the first year but now thanks to my pelvic floor strengthening I haven’t had one for ages. I also can’t run and jump and I used to love running, but that’s on the advice of my physio who told me to protect my pelvic floor as much as possible if I want another baby. I wear a pessary most days. I don’t know if you have an issue with prolapse, but you can get pessaries with a little nub shape in them which put pressure on your urethra to help with incontinence. Might be worth asking your doc? I’ve never tried that sort cos it wasn’t much of an issue for me. I’ve tried pretty much every other shape of them 🙈 My physio described it as a support bra for my pelvic floor which I liked cos it’s fairly depressing using one in your 30s. Xx

The one I found really helpful was the one where you envisage sitting on a marble and trying to suck it up all the way to your cervix and beyond. I'm not explaining it very well but they do here a bit www.thespec.com/life/health-wellness/2017/09/21/five-kegel-exercise-mistakes-you-re-probably-making.html

@Mummyme87 yes I'm going to look up some exercises on YouTube in the meantime. I hope I'm not too late. He's 14mos... I should have done this way earlier probably.

@Muriel84 I have to look up what pessaries are I have never even heard that word before lol miserable is the right word for it. I have to wear a liner most days when I go out because I'll wet my pants otherwise. It's like as if I have nothing else to worry about haha but truly I've neglected myself since my sons birth so I got no one but myself to blame. Thanks for the suggestions ❤️

@Muriel84 I missed your message about the daily discomfort since having a baby. That's so tough and horrible to have to give up running. Hopefully you can get it all sorted after having another. And there are midwives here who might have some good advice

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 time to try sucking in a marble with my lady bits! 😁 See if that helps before I get a proper appointment
That link is helpful thanks for sharing it

@VixFromThe6ix I know, the milkshake one 🤢

@VixFromThe6ix its never too late! also have you tried period pants? I use modibodi ones during my period and some designs are quite cute. They say they’re for incontinence too.

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 thanks hun. Yeah it is fairly crap and has gotten me very down at times. Does cast a shadow over what has otherwise been an amazing experience. I feel
more positive tho cos with ttc perhaps my op isn’t too many years away. And I have an excellent team looking after me 😊Xx

@VixFromThe6ix download the squeezy app. It’s really good.

@Muriel84 that's actually a great idea!!! Silly question .... Does it stay dry? I've seen period underwear ads but don't know how they work. I will look into this, thank you!

@Mummyme87 thank you, I will download it now.

I'm happy how helpful you've all been. I've been miserable over this and no one to really talk to about this. Thank you ❤️

Actually the pants look great. If using them for period, how do you change them when out or at work? Do you have to carry the old ones about in a little bag til you can get home and wash?

I think I am 3dpo so aligned with some of you

@VixFromThe6ix @A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 i usually use them with a tampon. They can sometimes feel damp when they need changing. I wear a heavy night time pair at night and just a regular pair during the day usually. they are great! I hate the plasticy feel of pads. Xx

Well, here we go again! Cycle number 6321… I believe I’ll have the solid smiley tonight, so ovulation will be tomorrow? Or Friday? I doubt this will be our month, but of course you never know. DP still hasn’t done his sperm sample so this whole thing might be totally pointless anyway!!

Ohhhh ffs, day 6 of the flashing smiley and DP’s kids have come back now until Saturday! 🤦‍♀️ how can it get so many days? This has never happened before. We usually aim to dtd every other day over ovulation, the idea is to get 3 solid attempts per fertile window, plus an initial ‘clear out’ one, 2 or 3 days befoe- (all so romantic!)

Sowe dtd Sunday, yesterday and now will have to tomorrow when the kids are here. And maybe Saturday too when they’ve gone? I’ve no idea when I will ovulate now, I’m due AF from the 16th, I don’t think that’s enough time 😭 this whole thing is just so shit isn’t it.

Last month I had 10 days of flashing smiles and only got my static on day 11!! I was beside myself that month! Lol xxx

Those flashing smiley tests would give me anxiety. I love seeing the colour on the stick and compare it to the previous test. I guess it's a visual thing for me.

I'm 6dpo today. This cycle I really had no symptoms after ovulation thus far. Last cycle I had a back ache, tiredness, tender boobs. However I'm having quite a bit of cm today. Is this normal? I'm not proficient in cm stages and stuff, so I don't know if this usually happens or if this is new.

Just a quick note on the period pants, I use them with tampons and as a confidence boost in general when I'm out for a long time (in case of incontinence), but I have had one instance when they didn't really hold the wee! So I probably need to get something specific (even though mine are for a "heavy" period.

@VixFromThe6ix I wish I could understand the normal OPKs. I just can't wrap my head around it so rely on the smilies 🤣last time I was TTC I didn't have anything unusual, they were pretty easy to use so hoping it's the same this time. I also can't really remember anything about my CM when TTC but hoping it's a good sign for you!

Ok, so DP’s kids are back at their mums tonight so I’ve told him he’s got to gird his loins, again! -how people keep up ttc for years on end is beyond me.

im really REALLY hoping for the static smiley tonight 🤞 either that or perhaps I missed it? I was really quite crampy yesterday and nothing so far today. Day 11 @Floralsandsmiles ?! That’s nuts

@AgeGapBbe good luck! It is tough when you have other things on and the window is (normally) so small....!

It was the month I had lots of positive opks and was wondering what the hell was going on that I got pregnant last time. Maybe more than one egg 🤷‍♀️ or a strong ovulation

O yes I know @AgeGapBbe ! I almost gave up, but was too stubborn and knew it wouldn't be much longer as had ewcm. Then there it was! Lol joke! Haha xxx

Right, im home from work and no one’s in… time for a test!

Annnnnnnd… day 7 of that smug flashing bastard

I did this test at 6pm which was darker than the 11am one. Would people bother repeating again tonight or just assume I’ll peak in the next 12 hours? X

Ovulation confusion everywhere!

I thought I'd try this first cycle without OPKs as I figured we've only got 2 weeks together so will hopefully be having as much sex as we can anyway. As it is, predictably I have absolutely no idea what's going on. I'm on CD 17 and I usually have a 34d cycle. I dont know that I've had any change in CM. It was maybe ewcm a few days ago but not massively and only on one occasion.

I think I'm definitely over excited this cycle with it being the first one. We've wanted a second for so long but the circumstances haven't been right. Trying to just think that it'll all figure itself out the way it needs to.

I'm sorry, @Muriel84 , I didn't want to read and run but I don't know I'm afraid x

@Muriel84 I would assume this to be peak or very close to it and assume ovulation sometime within next 24 hours or so if that were me

Aww I'm sorry @AgeGapBbe ! Xxx