9 months+ trying to conceive, still losing hope, still trying

[BritInNZ]

Continuing the earlier thread ladies before we run out of room... will tag in who I remember but feel free to tag others I may have missed. And newbies always welcome!

@Aubyone - pregnant! Adding in case she wants to keep in the loop 😊
@kmbegs
@FlyOnTheWall89
@Hopefullywaiting01234
@Tinkerbell098
@LucyAnne34
@MaryTeenOfScots

@Hoping43 - i know that is just strange - sorry if you have said earlier but do you have any answers? Any tests?

I haven't seen a fertility specialist yet, i had bloods done before xmas - everything came back ok (i think) FSH was 8.9 so towards top end of normal however my TSH (thyroid) came back at 5.5, it should be under 2.5 for fertility so that opened a can if worms as GP would treat me so bad to go private - the dr prescribed medication and i had some other private blood tests to check vit d/b12. They both came back low so i have been on high doee vit d for 2 months and been taking a number if other supplements to help thyroid. I have a feeling this what the problem is but time will tell as i have been on it all 2 months now and thyroid meds was upped last week as it had only come down to 3.3.

If i am not pregnant this cycle i am going for hycosy

@NatW2021 did you get any feedback on your FSH? I had mine done in November and I was 34 then and it came back as 9.6 so it sent me into a panic but the nurse I saw at the fertility clinic said it was fine so I will be interested to see what the consultant thinks. Literally know nothing apart from everything is normal so far and we’ve had bloods, semen analysis and I’ve had an ultrasound x

@Hoping43 - no i had no follow up from GP just said no action it was just what i read up online but tried not to worry to much over that. Will be interested to hear what your consultant says. I think 10 and under is "normal"

I had ultrasound as well and husband seaman analysis which were both fine.

@NatW2021 @Hoping43 did you guys get your fsh done at a certain day of your cycle?

I’m just stressing now you’ve said your numbers as I had irregular periods a few years ago and my fsh levels were 8.7 and 9.4 on different samples but I was told not to worry. I lost weight and things regulated themselves so I was discharged as my ovaries looked okay on the scan. Just makes me more concerned something is wrong now. My TSH was also above 2.5 (3.2) but also told this is normal?

@NatW2021 I think I would be happy if mine was 8.9 because lots I read said under 9 was optimal. I’ll keep you posted on what the consultant says. Literally counting down the days. We have waited 25 weeks since I first went to the doctors in sept. I wish in hindsight we had gone private but because it took 8 months to get pregnant with my second then we felt like we needed to wait til at least 8-10 months and then we had the NHS appt booked it so it seemed pointless x

@Sweetpeasandpeonies - yes i got it done day 2 as day 3 was a weekend.

How old are you if you don't mind me asking?

When did you get your thyroid checked? If it was awhile ago i would get it rechecked and have a read if this:

www.btf-thyroid.org/pregnancy-and-fertility-in-thyroid-disorders

@Sweetpeasandpeonies I think your results sound ok. When I saw the nurse at the fertility clinic she just said it was on the higher end of normal but that they do see people with levels at like 100 so she said it wasn’t of concern. I think the higher it is the lower ovarian reserve is likely to be but the nurse said they would find out more about that from my follicle count on scan which they did and said all was normal. So I’m not 100% sure on the connection between the two, all I know is they didn’t seem worried about it. I have night sweats during my period and have done ever since having my second baby so it sent me into a downward spiral of stress about being perimenopausal so then when I got the FSH result I was in serious panic mode but since the clinic told me it was ok, I haven’t thought about it so much x

I also had mine done on day 3 but I’ve heard it differs so day 1 would likely be lower than day 2 and day 2 lower than day 3 but not sure how true that is. I was down a you tube rabbit hole last night watching a consultant talk about AMH and FSH and he said they could take FSH 20 mins apart and it would give a different result x

@Sweetpeasandpeonies how long have you been TTC? X

@NatW2021Thank you - it was a while ago but will definitely get it rechecked. Have a family history of thyroid and autoimmune issues as well.

@Hoping43 Thanks both for the reassurance - just feel like I'm looking at every little thing as to what the reasons might be , when the whole world seems to be getting pregnant around me. It's nice to have a group that gets it.

I'm also lucky as my best friend is pregnant at the moment, and although it was super easy for her , she is being so kind and supportive of my journey as well.

@Hoping43 - i think under 10 is fine - i am holding off for private for time being other than hycosy as i am not really sure what else they can do for me at this point, i am ovulating so dont think i need clomid etc. bet you cant wait to see the consultant now, everything takes forever on NHS

@Sweetpeasandpeonies that’s nice. I have someone close to me who tried at the same time as me and got pregnant straight away and now has a 3 month old baby and she has been the opposite of supportive which made everything so much more difficult on my journey. I find people either get it or just don’t x

@NatW2021 are you waiting to see an NHS consultant?

Yes I just want to start making some progress now. Can’t bear all this waiting with everyone else in the world (except you guys) getting pregnant in the first month of trying, people having babies soon who have been trying less time than us etc etc. I just hope something can be done for us but I am worried about the financial implications of IVF x

@Hoping43 Yes my GP referred me when i had my blood results back but i know the waiting times are long - after i have had the Hycosy (which i am paying for) i think we have both had all the initial tests so by the time i actually see someone (hoping i dont have to) it might be straight to ivf but i need to lose some weight so i am working on that now as i dont know what else they can do as had SA, my bloods, ultra sound and Hycosy - they may want us to repeat the bloods and SA again

@NatW2021 how much weight do you have to lose? I hope everything goes well for you. I’ll keep you posted if I get any useful information at my appt next week x

@Hoping43 - thank you that would be great 😊💗 i have about 2 stone to lose - i always struggle with my weight but i know 2 stone is achievable if i put my mind to it, least its not like 4/5 stone which would be hard going for me.

Sorry to hear you havent been supported by your close friend/family (sorry im not sure which one) i have stopped talking about it now with the small family/friends that do know as there isnt much to say and i hate the look on their faces. This forum has been so good for me getting all my thoughts out so i think its helped as i feel i dont need to offload as much. My brother and his partner are TTC as we spoke about it last week - i have a feeling it will be happen for them soon (they are 3 months in) i will be so excited to be an aunty but i think ill find hard as i am the oldest and always hoped ours would be the first grandchild so i think it will be hard for me especially as we are trying x

@Hoping43 sorry you aren’t finding your friends supportive , that just make it extra hard

@NatW2021 have you had much advise about weight loss when TTC? I have about 1/2 stone to lose so not a lot but worried if I overdo the calorie deficit it’ll make it harder.

My AF is due on Friday and I already feel hormonal and miserable like AF is going to come 😭 my boobs are so sore which is always the case a few days before AF arrives. If other months are anything to go by, I should be spotting by Tuesday too. So I'm really hoping my new supplements help with the spotting but I'm not hopeful. I usually have sore boobs for 3-4 days and then the spotting starts and lasts for 3-4 days and then AF hits in full force. I hate this part! I've only got one more shot and then I have my next fertility appointment to get the wheels in motion on what happens next.

@NatW2021 I need to lose some weight too, about 1 stone would bring me back to a healthy range. I'm quite short, so any gain puts me straight into the unhealthy range. Not gonna lie, the pandemic has made me very unfit. I'm more into swimming than running/cycling and since all the pools shut two years ago, I was in a very bad place and never really got back into the routine. I still work from home, so in front of a computer most day. have started swimming again a couple of months ago, but really struggling to lose the weight now. I'm also concerned about going on a diet/ create calorie deficit as I don't want to deplete any nutrients so not really sure what the most efficient way to lose weight is (I don't have much sugar anyway, so probably need to cut down carbs and have more protein perhaps?)

@BritInNZ sorry you're maybe starting AF again. I've just started mine today. Usually I'm a wreck on CD1, but this time I've just accepted it and I think having a plan has helped deal with it. Hope you don't get any spotting this time and the supplements are doing their job.

I've ordered another load of supplements to last the next three months so my bank balance is in a very sad state, especially since all the invoices for the private appointments have just been paid as well. I don't know if it's me being stupid or just hormonal due to AF, but I'm going on a shopping spree for some much needed retail therapy. Hope everyone's having a good weekend and enjoying the sunshine!

@Hoping43 sorry forgot to reply. My AMH was 12.6. Consultant said it's "fair" for my age (36), but not the best, so was a reason to push me for IVF straightaway. Did you get the test done privately? I just emailed the consultant's secretary to ask to share the result and she did. So I had it before I went into the follow up appointment.

@BritInNZ sorry you're feeling low. I completely understand how horrible explained must be. Knowing the reason is horrible too but at least I have a reason. It's the darkness, the unknown and the limbo that is excruciating. You're doing so well. You're ticking all the boxes. There is nothing more you can do. Keep with it 💕.

@Tinkerbell098 thanks. Do you know your follicle count and FSH? Just trying to gauge what mine might be but don’t know if it’s possible. The wait to find out is killing me. It’s NHS so they don’t tell me. I’ve rung a couple of times x

@BritInNZ sorry for feel rubbish. I always feel like that in the week before AF as well. At least you’ve got a plan in place for if it doesn’t happen which will hopefully lead to your BFP but I know it’s not always a comfort when it’s what you want.

I’ve been to see some friends today and it was hard as my friend is expecting (which I knew) and she’s been really supportive, but she’s just had her 12 week scan and telling people now so just had a day about how kids are the best thing ever all day. So happy for her but it just got a bit draining after a while as it’s all I want as well. Never mind will just keep going and hope one of these months it’ll be my turn

@Tinkerbell098 - i am not 100% sure i was just aiming to reduce sugar/cut down on carbs/take aways etc and try to exercise a little more - i put on some weight during lockdown, i WFH but find i actually eat better now. I have been listening to a great podcast which has loads of episodes which i would recommend its called food freedom and fertility podcast,

@BritInNZ - my nutritionist said to me give things time to work i know its hard and you want to see results quickly but keep being consistent and give your body time - i know its frustrating x

@Sweetpeasandpeonies - sorry to hear you had a tough day - i know this all to well when i catch up with friends its all they talk about and for me i just feel worse as i am sat there out the loop and cant contribute, think it would be different if i wasnt TTC or didnt want children. As you said got to hope it will be us one day x